Piers’s voice was emphatic on that last statement.
“Well, as long as you realize he’s not like a toy you can pick up and put down at whim. He’s a lifetime commitment. When you start a new relationship, I hope, whoever she is, she’s on board with having a baby in her life.”
Piers shot her a searing glance. She could see the banked irritation in his eyes.
“What are you implying, Faye? That I’ll just ignore Casey when it suits me?”
“I’m not implying anything. But, let’s face it, you’ve only had a few weeks with a baby, part of which you had with me and the rest with Meredith who probably hardly let you hold him once she got there. You didn’t have any work or other priorities to deal with, so you could focus completely on him. It’s not the real world. The reality involves dealing with fevers and colds, teething, colic, potty training, tantrums, sleepless nights on top of the busy schedule you usually keep. You seem to think it’s going to be a walk in the park, but it’s not like that. Raising a child is damn hard work.”
“And you’d know because?” He pinned her under a hard stare, silently demanding she answer him.
“I know because I’m not some Pollyanna who thinks everything is always going to be all right. Bad things happen. Life doesn’t always go the way you expect to.”
As soon as she said the words she wished them back. It was almost the anniversary of Quin’s death. Piers knew as well as anyone else who’d suffered great loss that life could deliver unexpected blows along with the highs.
She hastened to make amends. “Look, I’m sorry. I’m out of line. I’ll get out of your way. I have a meeting with the new brand manager at ten so I’d better get down to marketing.”
“Yeah, you do that,” he said, his voice carrying a note of determination that made Faye’s stomach lurch a little. “And while you’re at it, ask yourself why you keep such strong emotional barriers up between you and everyone else. It’s not just me, is it? It’s everyone. Because while you’re questioning my ability to commit to Casey, I think perhaps you ought to be asking yourself why you’re not capable of committing to anything but your work.”
She looked at him in shock. His acuity cut straight through everything and got immediately to the point. She took in a deep, steadying breath and met his gaze, but even as she did so she could feel the sting of tears burning at the backs of her eyes.
Piers saw the moisture begin to collect and his expression turned stricken. “Faye, I’m sorry, this time I overstepped.”
“No, it’s okay,” she said, blinking fiercely and waving a hand between them. “I’d better go.”
* * *
Piers watched her leave, feeling as if he was little more than a slug that had crawled out of a vegetable patch. What on earth had spurred him to be so cruel to Faye like that? Was it because she’d hit a nerve when questioning his commitment to Casey? Or had it been her comment about bad things happening to people? Which she apologized for, the voice at the back of his mind sternly reminded him. Either way, he knew he’d done wrong. He couldn’t afford to lose her and it wasn’t just because she knew his company almost as well as he knew it himself.
The last two weeks without her had been oddly empty. Sure, he’d been busy with the baby, who’d already grown and changed in that short time. Yes, Meredith had helped him, but he’d made sure he’d been Casey’s primary caregiver. But Faye’s absence had made him all the more aware of what she’d come to mean to him on a personal level. If only he could get past that barrier she kept so firmly between them. He sensed the only way that would happen would be if he learned what had occurred in her past to make her so closed off and wary.
Obviously his people had done a background check before she’d been offered the job here, but it had focused on her credentials and experience, and had been peripheral to what he needed to know about her now. Maybe he needed to delve a little deeper. A part of him cautioned him about digging into her past without her knowledge—warned him that if she wanted him to know that much about her, she’d tell him herself. But Piers didn’t get things done by waiting for other people. Sometimes you just had to take control and steer the course yourself. This was one of those times.
By the time Faye returned from her meeting, Piers was satisfied that before long he’d get to the root of why she held herself so aloof. Of course, it didn’t mean that he wouldn’t keep trying to glean what he could from her in the meantime. As soon as she was back in the office, he rose from his desk and walked over to her.
“Everything go okay with the brand manager?”
“Yes, perfect in fact. You made an excellent choice there.”
“I know people,” he said without any smugness.
It was one of his greatest strengths and he wasn’t afraid to admit it. It was also the reason why he knew Faye had unplumbed depths he needed to explore. She deserved more in her life than the shell of existence he knew she lived. She deserved to feel, to laugh—to love.
“You do seem to have a knack there,” she admitted wryly.
“I’m glad you think so, but I’d like your help with the meetings I’ve scheduled for the afternoon. An agency is sending over some nannies for interviews. I want to establish a nursery for Casey on this floor. I was thinking of repurposing the archive room a couple of doors down, actually. Archives can be moved to another floor. I’ll need someone who can be here with Casey during the day and at home when I have to make an overnight trip anywhere—although I plan to minimize travel where possible from now on.”
Faye looked at him in surprise. “You want me to help you with interviews?”
“Of course, you’re my right hand here.”
She looked uncomfortable. “But choosing a nanny... Surely that’s something you should do on your own.”
“Why?”
She was running again, moving into classic avoidance mode, although perhaps not quite as literally as she had back at the lodge.
“Well... I...”
“I trust your judgment, Faye. Will you help me?”
He’d chosen his words carefully, knowing her pride in her work wouldn’t allow her to say a flat-out no if he phrased it like that.
“Why me? Maybe you should ask someone else on staff who already has children and has hired nannies before.”
“But you know what I need. You always do. First appointment is after lunch.”
He saw her visibly sag. “Fine, I’ll be ready. Is there anything in particular you want me to look out for?”
“No, just use your judgment like you always do. I know you won’t be shy in telling me what you think. And, Faye,” he continued just as she started to turn and walk away, “I want to apologize for my comment earlier about commitment. It was unkind of me to say that especially when you’ve always been there for me when I needed you.”
“It’s fine. Consider it forgotten.”
“No, I can’t forget it
