being petulant.’
‘I feel petulant,’ Zack said.
‘I’m just saying that I’ve thought this through and there’s no need for you to get worked up. I can more than cope with single motherhood.’
‘That’s good to know,’ Zack said, but with an edge. ‘And do I get to see my child in this plan you’ve made?’
‘If you choose to, then I’m sure we can sort that out.’
‘You’ve really thought this through.’
‘I have,’ Freya said. ‘So when I have your thoughts we can make plans or not.’
‘Are you worried, upset?’ Zack checked. ‘You were just getting back into psychology.’
‘I don’t see that one has to exclude the other.’
‘Are you—?’
‘Zack, I’m thirty-one,’ Freya interrupted his questions. ‘I was already planning on single parenthood. I’m not going to fall in a heap.’
‘You don’t like it when the tables are turned, do you?’ Zack said. ‘You want my thoughts, yet you refuse to give yours.’
‘Ask away,’ Freya said.
‘Okay, what about us?’
‘You’ve made it clear that it’s just sex you want from me.’ Freya put her nose in the air as if she disapproved.
‘You don’t want sex?’ Zack asked, and she didn’t answer. ‘Well,’ he said.
Freya pressed her lips together. She didn’t know this mood. He was arrogant and angry yet there was this twist of a smile on his face that she didn’t get.
Zack carried on. ‘With all this sexual attraction do Mommy and Daddy do it when you drop the baby off?’
‘I don’t know where this is leading, Zack.’
Oh, my God, Zack thought, she’d just used that voice again.
‘Well, you’ve been so busy sorting it out I just wondered if that was covered already. Curious...’ Freya could see that black smile was there and it wasn’t the news he seemed annoyed with but her.
Freya.
The woman, Freya knew, that he didn’t want to have a relationship with.
‘What about the two of us?’
‘No,’ Freya said. ‘I lived through my parents’ unhappy marriage. I’m not inflicting it on my child.’
‘You jump straight to marriage.’ His grin was incredulous now!
‘I’m saying that I don’t want a marriage, I want to do this on my own. Of course you’ll be entitled to access.’
‘Do you know what I like about you, Freya?’ Zack said. ‘You’ve got it all worked out.’
Freya looked at him.
‘Do you know what I don’t like about you, Freya? That you’ve got it all worked out without me.’
‘I don’t understand.’
‘That’s okay.’ Zack shrugged. ‘I’m not in the mood for explaining. Well, thank you for dropping by.’
He stood and went to the door.
‘Are you asking me to leave?’
‘Yes.’ Zack said. ‘Pay attention to the sign next time. If it says don’t disturb, don’t disturb.’
‘But we need to talk.’
‘We already have.’
‘I need your thoughts.’
‘Well, you can’t have them yet.’
He didn’t have a clue what they were.
HIS HANGOVER WAS impressive and instead of going to The Hills, where no doubt Freya would be tapping her feet, waiting for him to snap to her snappy tune, he took the morning off and in the afternoon he drove into South LA and to the Bright Hope Clinic.
‘Mila’s not here today,’ Geoff said.
‘I know. I’m just dropping by to see how things are going.’
‘Well, we’re taking delivery of an MRI machine tomorrow,’ Geoff told him, ‘and I’ve just ordered a state-of-the-art ultrasound that might mean we can have intelligent conversations...’
It had been frustrating. Knowing that The Hill’s equipment would give clearer answers, there had been a lot of doubling up. Zack wanted state of the art, so nearly every test Geoff had done had been repeated.
‘It’s great news about Paulo.’
‘I think he’ll be going home soon,’ Zack said.
They went through the patients and Geoff said he’d like to come and watch the scheduled ablation.
‘On a Sunday?’ Zack checked. ‘And it’s Valentine’s Day.’
‘My wife is very understanding.’
Zack saw a few patients and then drove back to the hotel and lay on the bed with his hands behind his head and tried to make some sense of his thoughts.
He took out his laptop and typed in a few things, and found out that their baby, assuming it had been conceived on the first night, was due on September twenty-fourth.
He stared at that date for ages and then he texted Freya.
Are you okay?
She took less than a minute to respond.
I’ve told you I’m fine with it.
He fired back another text.
Such a well thought-out response!
Then he deleted it, unsent, and wrote another.
Let me know if you need anything.
She wouldn’t.
That much Zack knew.
He still couldn’t get over how she’d been the night Cleo had died. Even he had teared up but not Freya. It was like she kept all her emotions inside and yet he had glimpsed them.
The things she’d told him, Zack knew, only he knew.
And
