her a few moments to work out what to say to her friend.
‘Well? I could not have heard what I think I heard? Tell me!’ she ordered as she clenched her jaw shut and ground out the words. Elizabeth strode over to the bed and threw herself on it, rolling on her stomach and leaning on her elbows.
‘I overheard James speaking to his father about his misgivings about our marriage last evening.’ That was a good beginning. Elizabeth would take the lead and drag the rest of it out now.
‘When? I was at the feast with you.’
‘After you retired, James escorted me back and he kissed me.’
Elizabeth sighed, clearly enamoured of this betrothal. Tavis was, as she’d told Ciara many times, too old for her. She liked James because he was only a few years older than either of them. And he was not as intimidating as Tavis. The sight of a naked Tavis, though it had excited Ciara, had overwhelmed Elizabeth. She would have to begin searching through the Murray men for an appropriate husband for her dear friend.
‘Was it wonderful?’ she asked, closing her eyes as she did.
‘It was … nice.’
Elizabeth rolled over on to her side and gave Ciara a perplexed glance. ‘Nice? But that is good, is it not?’
Ciara did not want nice, she wanted more than that. She wanted a kiss from her future husband to be wonderful and exciting and transcendent. Like Tavis’s later kiss was. Rather than trying to explain it, she simply agreed.
‘Aye. But I realised afterwards I’d forgotten my shawl on my chair and went back to get it.’
‘That one? The one James brought with him earlier?’ Ciara nodded, embarrassed that she’d not even noticed it.
‘I was about to enter the hall when I heard them talking about my mother.’
Elizabeth might seem like a flighty young girl when they spoke of a kiss, but she was her closest friend and she knew this was a serious matter. She moved to Ciara’s side and drew her to sit next to her on the bed, holding tightly on to her hand and not letting go.
‘I had no inkling of any of it,’ she whispered, the words and truth still difficult to accept let alone speak of it to another. ‘My mother was called the Robertson Harlot.’
It made no sense to her even now that Tavis had confirmed it. Marian Robertson a whore? Her mother never even looked at another man and was deeply in love with Duncan. She shook her head. ‘I cannot believe it, but Tavis confirmed it.’
‘You spoke to Tavis about this? When?’ Elizabeth asked as she pressed a linen square in her hand.
Ciara did not even realise that tears flowed once more. She dabbed her eyes and then tried to tell the rest.
‘I listened until they left the hall and could not even believe all they’d said. I went to find Tavis, hoping he would tell me it was all a lie,’ Ciara said. Taking in and releasing a deep breath, she admitted the painful truth to her friend. ‘My mother was found with several men by her father and banished as punishment. She bore me during that exile and was only allowed back after I was born.’
Elizabeth gasped then. ‘It cannot be true, Ciara. It cannot.’ She shook her head several times. ‘Your mother and father …’
‘I always knew Duncan was my stepfather and never knew about my real father. I was but a bairn the few times I asked and even I understood it was not to be asked again. I asked again just before we left Lairig Dubh, but my mother said we would speak of such things when we had time.’ She shook her head and Elizabeth tsked several times in sympathy.
‘Apparently what my mother does not wish me to know is that no one knows which of those several men is the one.’ Elizabeth released her hand and jumped up from the bed.
‘Tavis said this is true?’
‘He said that he did not know if it was the truth, but he heard the same rumours when he accompanied Duncan to Dunalastair when he met my mother. And that my mother never denied it. The laird declared that it was past and that none in Lairig Dubh were to speak of it.’
‘Surely your parents would have told you if this were the truth? They would have to expect you’d hear this.’
‘Mayhap they hoped that the Murrays were so desperate they would not bring up such a shameful matter and insult either the MacLeries or the Robertsons?’ she pointed out. ‘I cannot ask them anything until I return. But it is too late now to rescind my agreement to marry James.’
‘Why would you change your mind? Did he offer you some insult?’ Elizabeth crossed her arms over her chest and lifted her chin a bit. ‘Let me speak to him and I will make certain he knows these are lies.’ Her staunchest supporter, always ready to protect and defend her.
‘James and I are at peace over this, Elizabeth. He appreciated my frankness in speaking to him about the matter, so there is no need for you to provoke him in any way.’
‘And Tavis? Where does he stand in all this?’
Ciara turned her head and looked away. He had kissed her with abandonment, showing her everything that James’s kiss was not, and then sent her back to him. He expected her to stand by the betrothal and live her life without him. He had convinced himself that he could not claim her for himself and no matter how or what she argued, his reasons stood in their way. Damn the man!
‘He returned me to the Murrays, but not before showing me that he does feel something for me. A taste of what passion is like.’
Elizabeth gasped then. ‘What did he do?’
‘’Twas only a kiss,’ she explained, trying to believe it herself. Instead her body remembered the heat and the thrill once more, leaving her breathless in its power.
He returned you to James.
The reality of that action cooled her immediately. Anger flared now that he could claim she meant something to him and then he could discard her in the next moment.
‘A moment of passion that is gone now. Do not worry. He said there are reasons, but goes no further,’ she explained. Ciara looked at her friend and shared her innermost worries about everything she’d learned last night.
‘I think that this hidden truth, whatever it is, is the reason why the MacLeries are so happy to rid themselves of me. My uncle provided most of my dowry, I know that much, so it costs them little and gains them much. Since the Murrays are in great need, this works out for them. James marries me for my dowry and the truth as he knows it does not stand in the way.’ She paused and took a breath.
‘Tavis has some truth that stands in his way and he will not reveal it. My parents live with some lie that they will not reveal. And I stand in the middle of it, gaining a husband who does not want me, losing a man who does and with parents and family who do not care enough to give me the truth.’
Elizabeth threw her arms around her then and hugged her to within an inch of her life, forcing almost all the air from her lungs.
‘None of that matters, Ciara. You are a jewel and James Murray understands that or I will beat it into him!’ she promised. ‘Once they discover all of
