to take that hand, to press it to his parched lips, to wet it with his tears, to kiss, to kiss it to all eternity. He wanted to say a great deal, but what he did not know himself; he would have been glad to die at that instant. But his arms felt like lead and would not move; he was as it were numb, and felt nothing but the blood pulsing through his veins, with throbs which seemed to lift him up as he lay in bed. Somebody gave him water…. At last he fell into unconsciousness.
He woke up at eight o’clock in the morning. The sunshine was pouring through the green, mouldy windows in a sheaf of golden rays; a feeling of comfort relaxed the sick man’s limbs. He was quiet and calm, infinitely happy. It seemed to him that someone had just been by his pillow. He woke up, looking anxiously around him for that unseen being; he so longed to embrace his friend and for the first time in his life to say, “A happy day to you, my dear one.”
“What a long time you have been asleep!” said a woman’s gentle voice.
Ordynov looked round, and the face of his beautiful landlady was bending over him with a friendly smile as clear as sunlight.
“How long you have been ill!” she said. “It’s enough; get up. Why keep yourself in bondage? Freedom is sweeter than bread, fairer than sunshine. Get up, my dove, get up.”
Ordynov seized her hand and pressed it warmly. It seemed to him that he was still dreaming.
“Wait; I’ve made tea for you. Do you want some tea? You had better have some; you’ll be better. I’ve been ill myself and I know.”
“Yes, give me something to drink,” said Ordynov in a faint voice, and he got up on his feet. He was still very weak. A chill ran down his spine, all his limbs ached and felt as though they were broken. But there was a radiance in his heart, and the sunlight seemed to warm him with a sort of solemn, serene joy. He felt that a new, intense, incredible life was beginning for him. His head was in a slight whirl.
“Your name is Vassily?” she asked. “Either I have made a mistake, or I fancy the master called you that yesterday.”
“Yes, it is. And what is your name?” said Ordynov, going nearer to her and hardly able to stand on his feet. He staggered.
She caught him by the arm, and laughed.
“My name is Katerina,” she said, looking into his face with her large, clear blue eyes. They were holding each other by the hands.
“You want to say something to me,” she said at last.
“I don’t know,” answered Ordynov; everything was dark before his eyes.
“See what a state you’re in. There, my dove, there; don’t grieve, don’t pine; sit here at the table in the sun; sit quiet, and don’t follow me,” she added, seeing that the young man made a movement as though to keep her. “I will be with you again at once; you have plenty of time to see as much as you want of me.” A minute later she brought in the tea, put it on the table, and sat down opposite him.
“Come, drink it up,” she said. “Does your head ache?”
“No, now it doesn’t ache,” he said. “I don’t know, perhaps it does…. I don’t want any… enough, enough!… I don’t know what’s the matter with me,” he said, breathless, and finding her hand at last. “Stay here, don’t go away from me; give me your hand again…. It’s all dark before my eyes; I look at you as though you were the sun,” he said, as it were tearing the words out of his heart, and almost swooning with ecstasy as he uttered them. His throat was choking with sobs.
“Poor fellow! It seems you have not lived with anyone kind. You are all lonely and forlorn. Haven’t you any relations?”
“No, no one; I am alone… never mind, it’s no matter! Now it’s better; I am all right now,” said Ordynov, as though in delirium. The room seemed to him to be going round.
“I, too, have not seen my people for many years. You look at me as..,” she said, after a minute’s silence.
“Well… what?”
“You look at me as though my eyes were warming you! You know, when you love anyone… I took you to my heart from the first word. If you are ill I will look after you again. Only don’t you be ill; no. When you get up we will live like brother and sister. Will you? You know it’s difficult to get a sister if God has not given you one.”
“Who are you? Where do you come from?” said Ordynov in a weak voice.
“I am not of these parts…. You know the folks tell how twelve brothers lived in a dark forest, and how a fair maiden lost her way in that forest. She went to them and tidied everything in the house for them, and put her love into everything.
The brothers came home, and learned that the sister had spent the day there. They began calling her; she came out to them. They all called her sister, gave her freedom, and she was equal with all. Do you know the fairy tale?”
“I know it,” whispered Ordynov.
“Life is sweet; is it sweet to you to live in the world?”
“Yes, yes; to live for a long time, to live for ages,” answered Ordynov.
“I don’t know,” said Katerina dreamily. “I should like death, too. Is life sweet? To love, and to love good people, yes…. Look, you’ve turned as white as flour again.”
“Yes, my head’s going round….”
“Stay, I will bring you my bedclothes and another pillow; I will make up the bed here. Sleep, and dream of me; your weakness will pass. Our old woman is ill, too.”
While she talked she began making the bed, from time to time looking at Ordynov with a smile.
“What a lot of books you’ve got!” she said, moving away a box.
She went up to him, took him by the right arm, led him to the bed, tucked him up and covered him with the quilt.
“They say books spoil a man,” she said, shaking her head thoughtfully. “Do you like reading?”
“Yes,” answered Ordynov, not knowing whether he were asleep or awake, and pressing Katerina’s hand tight to assure himself that he was awake.
“My master has a lot of books; you should see! He says they are religious books. He’s always reading to me out of them. I will show you afterwards; you shall tell me afterwards what he reads to me out of them.”
“Tell me,” whispered Ordynov, keeping his eyes fixed on her.
“Are you fond of praying?” she said to him after a moment’s silence. “Do you know. I’m afraid, I am always afraid…”
She did not finish; she seemed to be meditating. At last Ordynov raised her hand to his lips.
“Why are you kissing my hand?” (and her cheeks flushed faintly crimson). “Here, kiss them,” she said, laughing and holding out both hands to him; then she took one away and laid it on his burning forehead; then she began to stroke and arrange his hair. She flushed more and more; at last she sat down on the floor by his bedside and laid her cheek against his cheek; her warm, damp breath tickled his face…. At last Ordynov
