Ask, Don't Get” school of begging.
So come prepared with savvy questions. Sreene Ranganathan, a member of Facebook's Corporate Development team and former Jefferies banker, put it succinctly when he said, “I hate it when people don't do at least a minimum amount of homework. I mean how much friggin’ work does it take to look me up online and find out one or two interesting things about me? It shows me that I'm not just one of thousands of bankers and firms you're meeting with.” Nowadays, given how easy it is to stalk someone online, if you don't do it, it shows you're really not that interested.
Being the interviewer is really quite mindless because every candidate has the same answers to the same questions. So try to stand out, either because you're not wearing socks (this strategy is risky), your last name is Musk (or even Elon), or you've done your recon and can recite every deal the firm completed. I once had a candidate who read every interview I'd given in the Wall Street Journal and watched every presentation I'd delivered at industry confabs. That showed me a real interest in the industry, my firm, and, most important, me. In an ocean of candidates just looking for a safe port in the storm, nothing differentiates a candidate like a real, genuine interest in finding the right ship.
The Inquisition
So how exactly might you come off as unique? By providing one-of-a-kind answers (in a gregarious way1) to predictable questions. Here are some Q&As that should help get those gears turning:
What's your biggest weakness?Good answers: Almost any answer that doesn't relate to the job is good. For example:“I care about people too much.”“I love animals more than some people.”“I get very emotional about hunger and homelessness.”Turn any weakness into a strength. Here are a few others:“I'm obsessive.” Generally not great with boyfriends or girlfriends (see the film Fatal Attraction), but it can be a superpower if harnessed, particularly if proofing numbers and fonts is your bag.“I'm always pleasing people.” Again, not perfect if you're in Fifty Shades of Grey, but senior managers and bankers secretly love this. We all want loyal employees who will go the extra mile, and there's nothing like someone who's motivated not just by money, but by an innate drive to satisfy our every desire!“I love the weeds; I get lost in them.” Perfect because someone needs to check the work. It sure won't be me. I paid my dues and I'm done reviewing numbers and fonts that no client will ever check because they'll assume that we did!Terrible answers:Anything that could be translated in your interviewer's mind that you would not be a good employee and would be clearly bad for the job. Examples would be sloppiness, tardiness, and lack of enthusiasm. Tread carefully.Anything that presumes you're too good for the job you're applying for. In other words, don't overstep your bounds, and don't make it seem like you think you should have your interviewer's job.
For extra credit: What I look for most in a candidate is self-awareness. There's something called the self-enhancing transmission bias, whereby people share their successes more than their failures. This can lead to a false perception of reality and the inability to assess situations accurately. People with big blind spots are a recipe for future disaster. So if you take too long to answer when I ask you about your biggest weakness, that makes me think you're probably a narcissist, a sociopath, or both. So make sure you know your weaknesses (or at least have good answers), and don't hesitate before answering. If you don't have any weaknesses, Mazel Tov. Be sure to send me your name and address so I can refund the money you spent on this book and address it to your real name: Jesus Christ.
Why do you want this job?Everyone knows the only honest answer to this question, but no one wants to hear it: “Moolah, dinero, buckeroos, Benjamins, cashola.” Stay away from that answer because it sends the signal that you're just a mercenary jerk. Instead, do your homework and respond with something that specifically relates to the company, such as the following:“Because of the culture.” I know you're thinking that's a lame answer, but I will tell you that this is the most important thing in choosing a place to work. In most jobs, you'll be with your coworkers more than anyone in your life—that includes your drinking buddies who bum off your food. So even though you think you're an adult, you're still growing, and just like how peer groups affect teens more than anything else,2 your coworkers will shape the professional you'll become. But just so you don't sound like a complete suck-up, make sure you have examples of how their culture differs.Compensation, promotion, and client practices are all good fodder. And better yet, if the firm has been a great feeder into other careers like nonprofits or politics, that works too.“Because of the deals you've done this quarter.” Make it obvious you've studied their deals, products, and projects. Better yet, make it clear that you would early-decision them in a heartbeat like you did your college admissions.
How many balloons can you fit in a truck?This is a real question, and equally inane queries are the favorites of highly paid interviewers, maybe because they're bored out of their minds asking dead-end questions like “What are your goals?” and “What do you perceive as your strengths and weaknesses?” Or maybe because they really think they might learn something about the candidate by their reaction. There are a bazillion variations of this sucker. How many squirrels would be needed to blanket the Moon? How many golf balls could you stuff in your colon? You get the idea. Each question is more absurd than the one that preceded it.Lest you think I'm making this up, ask around. These are actual questions asked at top investment banking and management consulting firms like Goldman and McKinsey. Why, you ask? Because they want to see how you think “out of the box,” as they say. I know; it's stupid, but make sure you walk through the methodology in a coherent manner. Obviously, no one has any idea what the real answers are; they're just interested in how you think under pressure. The only right answer is to play along, but at the same time show you can think out loud logically. Ask clarifying questions. Remember that a big problem is just a bunch of small ones, so break them down and solve them one by one.Take a lesson from Spencer Wang, a former banker at Credit Suisse and Salomon Brothers, who retired as the chief investment officer of Seasons Capital. When hiring, Spencer always asked candidates his own version of the balloon question. “I'm going to flip a coin 10 times,” he'd tell them, “but first I'm going to give you $1 million of my money to bet on a coin flip. What's your bet on the first flip? What will be your bet on the 11th flip? Now what if it's your $1 million, does that change your answers?”Spencer knew these questions were atypical. Many would say it's a 50/50 proposition so it shouldn't matter what they bet. Spencer's take was that while these interviewees were book smart, there was nothing innovative in their answers. He generally rejected people who jumped at an answer without asking questions. One person Spencer did hire was a candidate who, once he learned he could ask questions, fired them off: “Is this a two-headed coin? Is it equally weight distributed? When could he stop and take his winnings?” Spencer hired him. Why? Because this person demonstrated intellectual curiosity, took charge of the situation, and turned it into one most in his favor. Spencer recently told me he still believes in this fellow, and that he invested in his fund, which has vastly outperformed the market during its lifetime.I have some experience myself with these “moonball” questions. One of my interviews out of Wharton was at a top management consulting firm, where I was asked by a smug interviewer the “Squirrels on the Moon” question. I actually knew how many squirrels could blanket the moon and told him. As we were about to wrap up, he asked me if I had any questions. I was young and had already decided I didn't want to count crap in the ocean for a living. So I asked him, “How many tires can you fit in the Pacific Ocean?” He nervously laughed off my question and bid me farewell.
Pitch yourself.This is another common ask, and a favorite of mine, particularly for more senior positions because I'm trying to gauge how people sell themselves. Some just panic, while others pitch themselves like a hot Internet stock. Personally, I go aggressive and pitch myself as the second coming of Amazon at IPO. Sometimes this strategy can backfire if you sell too hard,
