Anguished
• Ashamed
• Betrayed
• Blue
• Cheated
• Despair
• Disappointed
• Distraught
• Embarrassed
• Forgotten
• Guilty
• Heartbroken
• Heartache
• Heartsick
• Helpless
• Hurt
• If only
• Ignored
• Inadequate
• Inconsolable
• It’s not fair
• Left out
• Longing
• Loss
• Melancholy
• Misunderstood
• Mourning
• Neglected
• Nobody cares
• Nobody loves me
• Nostalgia
• Passed over
• Pity
• Poor me
• Regret
• Rejected
• Remorse
• Sadness
• Sorrow
• Tearful
• Tormented
• Torn
• Tortured
• Unhappy
• Unloved
• Unwanted
• Vulnerable
• Why me
• Wounded
Allow yourself to take a few moments and remember the last time that you or someone you know experienced grief. Then give yourself a few moments just to be with whatever feeling this memory brings up in this moment.
Could you allow yourself to welcome this feeling as best you can?
Could you allow yourself to let it go?
Would you let it go?
When?
Before you go on, repeat the releasing process a few more times. Keep at it until you feel as though you are able to let go of some or all of what you are feeling, and then continue with the next emotion.
Fear
When we experience fear, we want to strike out, but we don’t, because we think the risk is too great. We believe we’ll probably get hit harder. We want to reach out, but do not because we think we’ll get hurt. Our bodies have a little more energy than in grief, but the energy is still so contracted that it is mostly painful. Feelings can rise and fall very rapidly, like cool water on a hot skillet. Our minds are a little less cluttered than in grief, but still very noisy and opaque. Our pictures and thoughts are about doom and destruction. All we can think of and see is how we will get hurt, what we may lose, and how we must protect ourselves and those around us.
Releasing is an excellent tool for coping with fear, as Judy discovered on a six-week camping trip through Morocco and Kenya. On an isolated and precarious road atop the Atlas Mountains, the four-wheel drive jeep that she and eleven others were riding in suddenly turned over. For a few moments, everyone thought they were going to die, until the jeep stopped partway over the cliff. Hearts pounding, they scrambled carefully out onto the slope where they remained stranded overnight under challenging conditions. It was windy and chilly. They had few supplies or provisions, several people had diarrhea, and one injured man went into shock. Yet, throughout it all, Judy kept releasing her fear. As a result, she was calm, even fascinated, wondering if they would ever get out of their predicament and thinking it was an incredible adventure, however it wound up. Best of all, she lived to tell the tale without carrying around any sense of trauma from what had happened.
Words and phrases that describe fear:
• Anxious
• Apprehensive
• Cautious
• Clammy
• Cowardice
• Defensive
• Distrust
• Doubt
• Dread
• Embarrassed
• Evasive
• Foreboding
• Frantic
• Hesitant
• Horrified
• Hysterical
• Inhibited
• Insecure
• Irrational
• Nausea
• Nervous
• Panic
• Paralyzed
• Paranoid
• Scared
• Secretive
• Shaky
• Shy
