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Raising Boys
The Secret of Happy Children
Manhood
Raising Babies
Contents
Part One: The Five Stages of Girlhood
2 Right from the Start (Birth–2 years)
3 Learning to Explore (2–5 years)
4 Getting Along with Others (5–10 years)
5 Finding Her Soul (10–14 years)
6 Preparing for Adulthood (14–18 years)
Part Two: Hazards and Helps: The Five Big Risk Areas and How to Navigate Them
Part Three: Girls and Their Parents
Contributors and Acknowledgements
Dear Reader
Let me tell you a bit about myself before you jump into this book, so that you can know the person behind the words. People often think I must have boys, because I wrote and campaigned about boys for many years. In fact our first child was a boy (a man now). When our friends asked what we wanted next, I said I didn’t mind, and I really believed that was true. But when our daughter was born – by emergency caesarean, with me in the theatre trying my best not to faint – I was overjoyed. I couldn’t believe how happy I was. That happiness has never gone away.
I wrote about boys for just one reason – they were a disaster area, and the ethic of my work is to go where the need is greatest. Back in those days, girls were doing just fine. But about five years ago that started to change. We began to see a sudden and marked plunge in girls’ mental health. Problems such as eating disorders and self-harm, which once had been extremely rare, were now happening in every classroom and every street. But more than this, the average girl was stressed and depressed in a way we hadn’t seen before.
Girls aren’t born hating their bodies. They aren’t born hating their lives. Something was happening that was poisoning girls’ spirits. It seemed to come on in the early teens, but was creeping younger and younger every year.
In response, a worldwide movement sprang up – of girl advocates, therapists and researchers – to try and mobilise parents and the community. Many of these people were my friends, and together we saw the need for a simple, parent-friendly book to help get girlhood back on track. That is the book you now hold in your hands.
Raising strong girls starts young. We have to love them well, and we have to fight the forces that would bring them down. We have to make good choices because the world today does not seem to care about girls as it should, and sees them just as a way to make money. Of course some of these things are timeless. Girls have always needed to be strong.
Girlhood is a quest, a journey of gathering the wisdom needed to be a woman. We are our daughters’ guides on that quest. To do this we need good maps, good examples, and good clear eyes.
Perhaps your daughter is just a little baby. Perhaps she is in her teens. Whatever age, I hope this book lifts you up, fills you with a fire to make the world a better place for her and for all girls. And helps you to give her all the love you feel.
Sincerely,
Steve Biddulph
