I didn’t know about? Had the commander called him in to give him bad news from home, such as a death in his family? I thought I would never fall asleep, but I must have dozed, for I woke when someone opened and shut the door to our dark room. There were soft footfalls and then Spink’s bunk creaked as he sat down on it. I heard it creak again as he bent down to pull off his boots.
‘What was it?’ I whispered into the darkness.
His voice was husky. ‘I’m on probation. For immorality.’
‘What?’ I spoke louder than I meant to.
‘Quiet. I don’t want the others to know.’
‘Tell me!’
Spink came and sat down in the dark on the floor by my bed. He spoke in a hushed voice. ‘I was so shocked I thought I would pass out when Colonel Stiet accused me. He was shouting at me and I couldn’t understand what he was going on about. He accused me of leading an innocent girl astray, of corrupting a mere child with lecherous advances. I finally understood he was talking about Epiny. I didn’t know what to say, so I just kept my mouth shut. The more I just looked at him, the angrier he got. He started shouting at me, Nevare, saying that as long as he was commander, no cadet in his charge would be so corrupt. He asked me how I could be so depraved as to make advances to a mere child, the precious daughter of a respected family. And he told me that when she was of an age for courting, she already had other prospects, much better prospects than a frontier-bred New Noble whelp. He means Caulder. I just know he means that Epiny is for Caulder.’
I gaped at him. I couldn’t believe that, at that moment, he was more concerned over who might get Epiny than over the unjust charges against him. He didn’t notice my expression.
‘He must have roared at me for half an hour before he gave me a chance to speak. When I said I didn’t know what he meant, he shook a letter in my face. Then he read it out loud to me.’ He took a ragged breath. ‘It was from your aunt. She had the housemaids keeping watch over Epiny while she was gone. They’ve distorted everything about every moment that I spent with her. It’s all lies and innuendo, but they’re taking it as golden truth.’
I felt a horrible lurch in my stomach. ‘No,’ I pleaded, knowing it was true.
‘Yes.’ His voice hitched. I didn’t like to think he was weeping, but knew he was. ‘Your aunt found a letter Epiny was writing to me. It was … affectionate. I am sure it was no more than that. But she wrote that she is certain that I attempted to seduce her, a little girl still new to long skirts. She claims that she questioned the servants, and could prove that I had spent a long morning alone with her daughter. When the colonel asked me if that was so, I could not deny it. We did sit and talk in the morning room. And she wasn’t, well, she wasn’t yet dressed for the day. But, well, you know Epiny. That didn’t feel improper, only, well, unorthodox. I meant no wrong, Nevare. I meant no shame on your family. I am sorry, so sorry. And I’m so afraid I’ll be sent home from the Academy. And worst of all, I know that when my family’s letters arrive, asking permission for me to court Epiny, it will only be proof to everyone that I’ve behaved shamefully. Yet it didn’t feel that way. I thought I was doing everything correctly. I thought I had been honourable.’
‘You were! You did! It’s my stupid cousin’s fault! Epiny is the one sending letters to you. You haven’t written back, have you?’
‘I have. I’ve written reams and reams of letters to her, but I haven’t been able to send them. There was no way to do so without, well, without your uncle and aunt knowing. So there you are, Nevare. I did know it was wrong, or I wouldn’t have been hiding it from them.’
‘Spink, stop being so dramatic! Think this through. It’s Caulder behind it. He did hear us that day in the library! And this is his perfect revenge, not just on you, but on my uncle for coming to the Academy and complaining about how we were treated. I’m sure Caulder is behind this; he probably wrote to my aunt, or said something to his mother to get the rumour started. Then my aunt would have gone looking for evidence.’
‘I never should have let her write to me.’
‘Spink, how could you have stopped her? You didn’t do anything wrong. It was all Epiny! She was the one traipsing about the house half the day in her nightgown, she was the one making her horse run off and writing you lots of letters. How could you have stopped her? It isn’t fair. And—’ A slow realization was dawning in my sleepy brain, ‘I’ll wager my uncle knows nothing of my aunt’s letter. He liked you: I know he did. He wouldn’t write a letter accusing you of seducing Epiny. If he had any notion that you had behaved improperly toward her, he’d have bluntly told us when we were there. And if he’d heard accusations that you had done something improper, he would have come here and confronted us both. He’s direct; that’s his way. I’m sure of it. This hasn’t got back to him yet.’
Spink sat by my bed on the floor, breathing raggedly. When he spoke, his tone said this was obviously the worst news of all. ‘They’ve sent her away, Nevare. Colonel Stiet told me so. I won’t see Epiny again.’
‘What? Where did they send her?’
‘It’s done. They sent her to a finishing school, way out on the edge of the city. Colonel Stiet didn’t say which one, only that he wanted me to know that she was forever out of my reach.’
I had only the most vague concept of what a finishing school was. My elder sister had spoken of them with longing, as a place where women could learn music and poetry and dancing and manners, in the jolly company of other well-bred girls. A finishing school taught a girl all that she might need to hold graciously an exalted place in society. To send a girl to a finishing school did not sound like such a dire fate to me. I said as much.
‘Epiny will hate it there. And it’s all my fault, so she’ll hate me, too.’
‘Stop wallowing in it, Spink!’ I hated to hear him taking all the blame on himself. ‘Yes, she’ll hate it, but maybe they’ll teach her how to conduct herself like a lady. Maybe they’ll grind all this séance silliness out of her. Now listen to me. Tomorrow, I’m writing to my uncle about this. I write to him every day anyway, and I’m sure when I tell him what happened he’ll straighten it out and let Commander Stiet know that you haven’t done anything wrong and shouldn’t be punished. Besides, we have much worse things to worry about.’
Hastily I told him about the test, the culling to follow, and Trist’s suggestion to Gord. I had expected him to get angry at the suggestion he might cheat. Instead, it just plunged him deeper into despair. ‘I’m going to ruin everything for everybody. Oh, Nevare, it’s like a curse called down on me.’
‘Enough of curses! Don’t be silly, Spink. We need to focus on what is real and important. Forget about Epiny until after I’ve written to my uncle. The most important thing you can do in the next day or so is study your eyes out.’
But he was in no mood to hear or heed me. ‘I’ll try. But I can’t forget about Epiny or forget that I am at fault for her unhappiness. And now I endanger all of you.’ His clothing rustled as he stood up. ‘The best thing I could do would be to resign from the Academy immediately. Then they couldn’t count my low scores against the rest of you.’
‘Spink, don’t be an idiot!’
‘Too late. I’ve been that, and more. The colonel told me that I’ve exhibited every fault that he has come to expect in New Nobles’ sons. That my behaviour is far more suited to a common foot soldier than a cavalla officer, and shows that in elevating soldier sons to noble status, the King has usurped
