never touched him—not willingly, at least. In the whole year of their marriage not once had she reached out and placed her hand on his arm as she had done just now. Now the shock of the contact spread through her so that her fingers and arm tingled.
There was a moment’s tense silence before Katherine abruptly let him go. She drew a ragged breath of air into her deprived lungs while she avoided looking at him. But she sensed that Jordan was watching her. It disturbed her to wonder what she would see in those deep blue eyes if she looked...
‘It’s still there, isn’t it, Katherine?’ His voice was so low that it barely disturbed the silence of the night, yet she still jumped. Her eyes flew to his face, and what she saw there filled her with fear. Jordan was looking at her with an assurance and a certainty which allowed no room for doubts as he continued in that same soft tone.
‘Despite how much you hate yourself for it, you still feel that same desire for me that you felt on our wedding night.’
‘No!’ Katherine felt the blood drain from her head so fast that she thought she was going to faint. ‘You’re wrong... wrong! I don’t feel anything for you, Jordan. Do you hear me? Nothing at all except... except contempt!’
She tried to push past him, her whole body trembling with the shock of what he had just said. Jordan caught her wrist, his fingers cool and hard as they closed around her flesh to hold her still.
‘Don’t lie, Katherine! We both know what the truth is. Do you think I’m stupid? Do you imagine that I don’t know how you felt on our wedding night?’
‘Yes. You must be stupid, or incredibly arrogant!’ She gave a sharp laugh, then bit her lip as she realised she was verging on hysteria. She forced herself to meet his eyes, wanting desperately to convince him that he was wrong. ‘I know it comes as a shock to you, Jordan, but not every woman falls under your spell. If you want the truth, I hated what happened that night.’
His hands tightened; the violence she sensed in him made her wonder if she had pushed him too far. Then suddenly he gave a deep laugh, mocking, taunting, knowing... so very knowing, which was so much worse.
‘Mmm, is that a fact? You’re sickened by the idea of me making love to you? All you felt that night was revulsion ? Is that what you’re saying, Katherine?’
‘Yes! What does it take to convince you? Is your ego so huge that you can’t accept that I’m telling the truth? I hated you touching me, Jordan. I hated the thought of you anywhere near me!’
‘Like you’re hating me touching you now? Is that why your heart is racing, Katherine?’ He pressed his finger to the pulse which was throbbing at the base of her neck, and let it rest there, so that Katherine could feel its warmth branding her flesh. She jerked back, struggling to free herself, but Jordan was too strong for her to break the hold he had on her.
‘Let me go, Jordan.’
She saw his smile deepen. When he let his finger slide up her neck to come to rest by the corner of her mouth she closed her eyes, terrified of what he might see in them right now—all the turmoil and anguish she felt, all the shame that even now his touch could have such an effect on her.
‘It wasn’t loathing you felt that night, Katherine. Oh, you might have fought me like a she-cat, but it wasn’t because you were disgusted by what was happening—far from it.’ He slid that tantalising finger beneath her chin, forcing her head up. ‘You wanted me, Katherine. You wanted me with a passion that you had never expected, didn’t you? After all, you hadn’t married me because you were in love with me, so how could you have suspected that you would feel like that?’
His voice was like a drug, soft and deep, and so compelling that her eyes opened almost of their own volition. Katherine stared into his face, seeing the truth of what had happened that night—which she had tried so hard to escape from.
‘No. Jordan, I...’
He didn’t seem to hear her as he continued, in that same quiet tone which made a mockery of her halting attempts to deny what he was saying. ‘Maybe I was wrong to do what I did, but it wasn’t planned. It just happened, and for those first few minutes when I took you in my arms you responded to me. You can lie to yourself but we both know I’m right.
‘But tell me this, my sweet, who do you hate most? Me for showing you what you’re capable of feeling? Or yourself because for those few minutes you acted like a real woman, not a scared little girl!’
He let her go, his gaze contemptuous as he strode back up the path.
Katherine watched him go with tears burning in her eyes. She wanted to scream after him that it wasn’t true, but he wouldn’t believe her. Why should he? Both of them knew what had happened that night. One year later she was still paying the price for it.
No matter how hard she tried she could never forget how she had lain in Jordan’s arms and felt for him a passion she never wanted to feel again!
CHAPTER THREE
IT WAS almost three a.m. when Katherine heard the sound of a key in the lock. She hadn’t gone to bed. There had been no point—she had known she wouldn’t be able to sleep.
Jordan had left the reception shortly after Peter and Diane had left for their honeymoon. Katherine wasn’t sure where he had gone but she suspected that it might have something to do with Peter.
She had stayed up, waiting for him to return, longing for him to get back but also dreading it. Of course she wanted to know that Peter had nothing more to worry about, but it was the price Jordan might demand in return for his help which worried her. She knew to her cost the kind of bargain Jordan struck!
He was in the hall taking off his jacket when she opened the sitting-room door. He glanced round, and Katherine realised how exhausted he looked. There were deep lines etched either side of his mouth and his skin looked grey beneath its tan.
‘I thought you would be in bed by now.’ He tossed his jacket onto a hook then leant against the wall as though he was almost too tired to stand up. ‘Should I be touched that you waited up for me?’
The fleeting concern Katherine had felt disappeared at once. She stared coldly back at him, hating the way he kept taunting her like that. It was something he had never done before; it made her wonder a little fearfully what had changed to make him do so now. ‘I assumed that your absence had something to do with Peter’s problems. I wanted to know what had gone on and if you had decided to help him.’
‘Of course.’ Jordan gave a soft laugh which held just a thread of menace. His eyes were cold as he came along the hall, the tiredness in them not quite hiding his contempt. ‘I should have realised that any concern you felt was purely on behalf of your beloved brother. Silly of me to imagine anything else, wasn’t it? I must be more tired than I realised.’
Katherine swung round, refusing to stand there and debate the point when her nerves were already so on edge. ‘I’ll make some coffee. You look as though you could do with some.’
‘Mmm, there’s a lot of things I could do with, my sweet wife, but I doubt I’m going to get them tonight.’
There was a nuance in his voice which brought the colour to her face. Katherine busied herself filling the percolator until she was sure that the colour had faded. Yet, when she glanced round, Jordan was watching her with an expression in
