Buying a Fishing Rod for my Grandfather. Gao Xingjian
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“Are there too many young women in the city?”
“There’s no shortage of young men, it’s just that there are too few decent young men.”
“But this young woman is very good-looking.”
“If the woman falls in love first, it’s always unlucky.”
“Will he turn up?”
“Who knows? Having to wait really makes a person go crazy.”
“Luckily we’re past that age. Have you ever waited for someone?”
“It was he who first sought me. Have you ever made someone wait?”
“I’ve never failed to show up for a date.”
“Do you have a girlfriend?”
“I seem to.”
“Then why don’t you get married?”
“I probably will.”
“Don’t you really like her?”
“I feel sorry for her.”
“Feeling sorry is not love. If you don’t love her, don’t go on deceiving her!”
“I’ve only ever deceived myself.”
“That’s also deceiving the other person.”
“Let’s talk about something else.”
“All right.”
The young woman sits down. Then she immediately stands up again, looking towards the path. The last smudge of faint red on the horizon is barely visible. She sits down again, but, as if sensing people are watching, she puts down her head and appears to be fiddling with her skirt at the knees.
“Will he turn up?”
“I don’t know.”
“This shouldn’t happen.”
“There are too many things that shouldn’t happen.”
“Is this girlfriend of yours pretty?”
“She’s a sad case.”
“Don’t talk like that! If you don’t love her, don’t deceive her. Just find yourself a young woman you truly love, someone good-looking.”
“Someone good-looking wouldn’t necessarily like me.”
“Why?”
“Because I don’t have a good father.”
“Don’t talk like that, I don’t want to listen.”
“Then it’s best not to listen. I think we should leave.”
“Will you come to my home for a visit?”
“I should bring your daughter a present. It will also count as my best wishes to you.”
“Don’t talk like that.”
“What’s wrong with that?”
“You’re always hurting me.”
“That’s never been my intention.”
“I wish you happiness.”
“I don’t want to hear that word.”
“Then aren’t you happy?”
“I don’t want to talk about it. It’s been hard just to meet this once after all these years, so let’s not talk about depressing things like that.”
“Very well, then let’s talk about something else.”
The young woman suddenly stands up. Someone is coming along the path, walking very quickly.
“Well, at least he’s turned up.”
It’s a youth carrying a canvas satchel. He doesn’t slow down and keeps walking. The young woman looks away.
“It’s not the person she’s waiting for. Life’s often that way, oddly enough.”
“She’s crying.”
“Who?”
The young woman sits down with her hands raised; her hands are raised and seem to be covering her face, but it can’t be seen clearly. Birds are twittering.
“So there are still birds here.”
“It’s not only in forests that there are birds.”
“Well, there are still sparrows here.”
“You’ve become quite arrogant.”
“That’s how I managed to survive. If I hadn’t kept that bit of arrogance, I wouldn’t be here today.”
“Don’t be so cynical; you’re not the only person who has suffered. Everyone was sent to work in the country. You should realise that it was much worse for the young women sent to the country, where they had neither relatives nor friends. The reason I married him was because I had no better option. His parents arranged for my transfer back to the city.”
“I wasn’t blaming you.”
“No-one has the right to blame anyone.”
The streetlights have come on and produce a wan yellow light among the green leaves of the trees. The night sky is grey and indistinct; even the stars can’t be seen clearly in the city sky, making the light from the streetlights among the trees appear too bright.
“I think we should leave.”
“Yes, we shouldn’t have come here.”
“People might think we are lovers. If your husband finds out, he won’t misunderstand, will he?”
“He’s not that kind of person.”
“Then he’s a pretty good person.”
“You can come and stay at our place.”
“Only if he invites me.”
“Won’t it be the same if I invite you?”
“Too bad I didn’t know your address. That was why I went to look you up at your workplace. Otherwise, I would have gone directly to your home to visit you.”
“You don’t have to go into all that nonsense.”
“There’s no need for us to