Dandy said. “I wouldn’t want to scare off any of the ghosts.”
Malcolm gave him a look. “You couldn’t scare a flea off a dog’s behind. Keep walking.”
Dandy crept slowly behind Malcolm, then shouted, “Wait!”
Malcolm nearly jumped out of his jeans. “Don’t give me a heart attack like that! What’s wrong?”
“You didn’t bring the ghost detector.”
Malcolm exhaled a barrel full of nervous air. “I know. We’re just scoping the place out right now. Besides it’s pointless to try and detect a ghost during the day. Don’t you watch horror movies? They only come out at night.”
“So when do you plan to look for ghosts?” Dandy asked.
Malcolm grinned. “Tonight.”
Dandy turned a sickly shade of white. “A-alone?”
“Don’t be silly,” Malcolm said. “You’re spending the night tonight.”
Dandy’s face drooped. “Tonight?”
“Don’t be such a baby. Let’s go.”
Malcolm and Dandy walked up to the crumbling picket fence. It was an awesome sight. Even in the middle of summer, the trees looked dead and mossy. The weeds were taller than the first floor windows, and the second story of the house sagged. The top windows reminded Malcolm of sleepy eyes, waiting and watching.
Malcolm stepped onto the creaky McBleaky porch. He grinned.
“Dandy,” he whispered to his jittery friend, “a creaky porch is a definite sign of a haunted house.”
A cottony cobweb guarded the front door. “Bingo,” Malcolm said. “Another sure sign.”
And when he opened the squeaky McBleaky door, he knew he couldn’t have picked a better place. Malcolm was sure that nothing was living here. But just as they were about to step in, two hands grabbed their shoulders. Malcolm and Dandy whipped around with a scream.
“Ahhhhhhhhhhh!” A most hideous monster stood inches away!
“I’m going to tell Mom you came here,” Cocoa said, pursing her lips.
It took Malcolm a few seconds to catch his breath. “You followed us!”
“That’s right,” Cocoa said. “I told you I’d pay you back. Now you’re in big trouble, mister.”
“Well, if I’m in trouble then so are you. You’re here too.” Malcolm gave Cocoa a smug grin.
“Not if I tell Mom that I followed you because I knew you were up to something,” Cocoa said.
“And I’ll tell Mom that you don’t mind your own business,” Malcolm argued.
Cocoa pressed her fists to her hips. “I’ll tell Mom that you could have been killed out here, and I was only doing it for your own good.”
“I’ll tell Mom that I saw you kissing Carson O’Donnell behind the school last week.”
Cocoa gasped and covered her mouth. “You didn’t see that,” she whispered.
“Yes, I did,” Malcolm said. “And you’re just lucky I haven’t told Mom before now.”
Cocoa stood up tall and raised her nose in the air. “Fine. I won’t say anything if you won’t.”
“Fine,” Malcolm said. “Now go away.”
Cocoa stepped off the rickety porch and pushed through the tall weeds. She looked back and yelled, “But you better bring back my blow-dryer!”
Once she was gone, Dandy shook his head. “Your sister is weird.”
Malcolm nodded. “But not as weird as this old house. It’s perfect. We’re definitely coming back tonight.”
Malcolm sat with his family at dinner that evening, but his mind was on ghost detecting. Everyone was unusually quiet. Dad had the TV blaring from the living room so he could hear the six o’clock news. Malcolm saw his chance to launch Step One of his ghost-hunting plan.
“Mom, can Dandy spend the night?”
“Of course,” Mom said. “He can keep you company while you watch Grandma Eunice.”
The spaghetti in Malcolm’s mouth suddenly tasted like lead. “I’m watching Grandma Eunice tonight?”
“It’s just for a few hours,” Mom said.
“Why can’t Cocoa watch her?”
Mom laid down her fork. “Because Cocoa is going with me.”
“Why can’t I go?” Malcolm asked. He didn’t really want to go anywhere with them, but he wanted to protest.
Mom sighed and lifted her fork again. “You can go if you think you’ll enjoy shopping for Cocoa’s new dress.”
Cocoa wrinkled her nose and smirked at him.
Malcolm wouldn’t give up. “Why can’t Dad watch Grandma?”
“Bowling night,” Dad said, shoveling spaghetti into his mouth.
Malcolm sank in his chair. It was useless. He looked over at Grandma Eunice, who didn’t seem to notice they were talking about her. She had a large napkin tucked in her collar, and there appeared to be more spaghetti on her chin and fingers than on her plate.
He spoke to her in a defeated voice. “I’m staying with you tonight, Grandma Eunice.”
She gave him a tomatoey grin. “That’s nice.”
His plan to sneak back to the McBleaky house might not work after all.
That evening, Grandma Eunice sat on the edge of the sofa, watching an old black-and-white TV show. Dandy was lying on the floor, using Cocoa’s blow-dryer to balance a ping-pong ball. The ball floated on the steady jet of warm air—a trick Malcolm had shown him a few weeks ago.
Malcolm was stretched out on the other end of the couch, tapping the toes of his sneakers together out of pure boredom. He looked at his watch. Eight thirty. What time did the mall close, anyway? Knowing Mom and Cocoa, they’d stop off for a soda or ice cream afterward.
