little, maybe a lot.
Keep in mind that words that work with one kind of person
might not work with another. For instance, you and a close
friend may say “duh” just in fun. But if you use “duh” with a kid you
don’t know well, it’s hurtful. And if you use it with an adult, it’s insulting.
Swear words: You don’t need them. With
hundreds of thousands of words to choose
from in the English language, why use the ones
that were designed to insult and offend people?
Finally, pleasant words don’t count if the tone
of your voice says something entirely differ-
ent. Yell “I’m sorry,” and it means you’re not.
respect
It all boils down to respect.
Your manners tell other people that you respect them. Your manners
also say that you respect yourself.
You’re strong and self-reliant—you don’t have to put yourself first.
You’re in control. You’re poised. You know that offering respect to
people who are older than you are and people in authority doesn’t
take away from the respect you have for yourself.
In fact, you know that the more respect you give, the more
you get.
In a world with a lot of selfishness, you choose kindness and honor.
Who wouldn’t respect a person like that?
let’s talk
introductions
It’s open house at your new school, and the place is packed. You spot
a girl you knew in preschool, a boy from the pool, even your old babysit-
ter. So many familiar faces! What do you do when you end up in the
library with friends who don’t know each other? Introduce them.
Say both names and get things started by offering a little information
about each person. There are a few rules about how to do this, but if
you forget the rules, it’s not the end of the world. The worst mistake is
not to make the introduction at all.
Address the older person first.
Mr. Kander, I’d like
to introduce my friend
Freddy Ebb.
Freddy,
Mr. Kander
works with my mom.
Address a woman before a man.
Lynn Fontanne,
I’d like to introduce
my swim coach, Al Lunt.
Al, Lynn used to
babysit for me.
Identify the people you’re introducing, and use the names they’ll use for
each other.
Ms. Evans, I’d like
to introduce my cousin,
Roy Rogers.
Roy,
Ms. Evans is
my neighbor.
An introduction is a good opportunity to
let someone know that members of your
family use different last names.
Mom, Dad, I’d like to
introduce my friend
Sarah Vaughn.
Sarah, this is my
mother, Ms. Rogers,
and my father,
Mr. Hart.
It’s also a good way to identify stepparents.
Ms. Gilbert, I’d like to
introduce my stepfather,
Mr. Sullivan.
Art, Ms. Gilbert
is my English
teacher.
What if you forget someone’s name completely? All is not lost.
Introduce the person you do know, and chances are, the other one
will finish the job for you by saying her name herself.
This is Lynn.
Hi, Lynn,
I’m Loretta.
mr., ms., and more
Pop quiz: Your friend’s mom is working away in the kitchen when you
enter their house. You’re a girl with good manners, so the next thing
you do is
a. greet her.
b. walk on by as if she were a floor lamp.
Yes, friends,
