in the Chinese language, which I had to practice for some time before the event. My American boss of Schluckauf with his wife, and a travel-loving friendly couple from Germany, were visibly impressed by my speech. Despite attending adult evening classes in Germany, still, I have not mastered the Chinese language, to be able to speak fluently. As it is in Germany, there are many dialects in China. In Suzhou, the one spoken by my kinship is incomprehensible to me.
I recalled years back when I used to work as a supplier developer for a French company in Bietigheim. There, I joined a group to be trained like a marathon runner. Even though we only meet once in a year; we all have each others’ contacts. I did not spend much time convincing Hong about the health benefits of sports; she was a good runner, too, during her school days. Sports activities help me to get away from the hustle and bustles of daily life. Therefore, Hong and me took the chance to participate in the famous yearly “New Yearś Eve” running event through the city with thousands of spectators, before we flew back to China.
Yesterday, I spared some time cleaning up my office to get prepared for the Chinese New Year. After doing all the cleaning, I turned the television on to watch programs. There was continuous buzzing sound, indicating no signals. I wondered why. I asked my wife what could have happened! “It is pointless to keep on paying television monthly bills when you are always busy travelling abroad”
She answered. What have you just said! I asked, surprisingly, trying to figure out where the logic was in her statement. Hong’s way of doing things sometimes amazes me. In Germany you would never think of cancelling or stop paying television licence, just because you are temporarily going out of the country, it is even hard to imagine such a thing. However, despite all such behavioural characteristics, which are sometimes intolerable to me, I am proud of my wife. Perhaps her aim, in this case, was to save us from paying unnecessary costs.
The television bill was still not paid yet, what we decided to do instead, was to watch a movie on DVD. We also treated ourselves to special Tata tea, a powdery blend with a natural taste of various herbs such as Tulsi (Indian basil), Brahmi (fairy weed), cardamom and ginger, which I came back with from a business trip to India last year. As usual Hong is a woman with impulsive behaviour. She could suddenly change from one topic to another. Sometimes I find it difficult to understand her. At times I ask myself whether it is not the age difference? She is about twenty years younger than me. For example, when watching the DVD movie, she suddenly asked me what simple gifts do Chinese men donate to their loved ones? Not much concerned about the question, I replied, wine, books, and tea.
“No, you are wrong; it is flowers, wrist-watches, and wine”, she replied. I did not know that I learned it from her.
As the Chinese proverb goes, "don't listen to what they say, go see", we continued watching the movie; it was called "The Devil Wears Prada", its theme fittingly connected us to yet a short discussion about money and wealth. “I prefer to stay rich and healthy instead being poor and sick”, summarized Hong her ingenious opinion.
By the time we finished watching the movie, it was late in the night. Before I retired to bed, I grabbed my laptop to browse through my emails. As if driven by intuition, what caught my eyes straight away, was an email from my bank about an investment company that had suffered severe losses in value. I remembered another email from an Australian administrator sometime back alerting me of a company that had filed for bankruptcy, and that he had been asked to start the process. On reading this one, I immediately contacted my two British financial advisers Alan and Michael from Shanghai; they advised that my company was not affected. Amidst many thoughts, Hong came to the door, trying to distract me with a conversation. I took that opportunity to ask for legal advice on this since she is a lawyer.
I explained to her how I had been alerted that my Australian finances had plummeted to the bottom. But my financial advisers assured me that the investment in question was protected against losses in value. I got information that if I did not generate money, I would at least get my capital investment back. I was still confident since Deutsche Bank managed the funds and because it is commissioned by one of Australia's oldest financial companies.
Hong advised me that if the company was to go bust in Australia, I could at least sue the financial advisers In Shanghai. She suggested that it was vital for me to get another adviser to manage my funds.
She explained that private individuals were not allowed to do business directly with financial institutions. "Organise all relevant documents so that I can advise you further," she said.
Hong had a somewhat similar experience. In Germany, she was surprised one day to find that her bank statement with Deutsche Bank, showed "no funds available". She knew she had not emptied her account to the last penny. Inquisitive as a detective, she vowed to find out how this could have happened. "No funds available, yet I know I had not withdrawn all the money!", she wondered. She privately carried out her investigations. Eventually she found out that the day money was withdrawn from her account; she was in Bonn writing entrance examinations to obtain university qualifications. She further discovered that when she was still sharing a flat with two Arabs and a Chinese woman, her bank details were secretly copied.
Evidence indicated that it was the Chinese woman their roommate who did it. She faked Hong's signature and presented it at Deutsche Bank in Frankfurt. Because many Asians have similarities in features, it was easy for the Chinese woman to forge Hong's signature. Hong was determined to finish it all. After a long, arduous task, efforts paid off. The bank finally refunded her stolen money.
Every night before I retire to bed, I check on the share price index, at least before the end the day. Today it is not all good news; prices have gone into minus. Amidst thoughts, the small voice in me is referring to what my financial advisers have always said, that it is normal for share prices to go into minus. I must be patient and wait for them to rise again.
I am about to go to the bedroom, but still feeling a bit troubled by the share price news. As if to revenge for my coming back home late, when we went to bed, Hong turned her back towards me, I had no choice but to coil my left palm around her breast. It perfectly fitted inside. I consoled myself by saying after all " A breast in the morning dispels all worries".
In a speech after church wedding in Germany, I mentioned that as far as I am concerned, I care less about whether Chinese women have small breasts. Her breasts fit in well into my palm, and I am comfortable with it, I don't need anything more, end of the story.
Whenever I hold my wife's breast in my palm, I contemplate about many different things between China in the East, and German in the West.
• In China, when I turn the garden lock around on the left, it closes, when I turn it on the right, it goes up.
• If I wanted to have a shower, I turn the blue tap on, for hot water, and a red tap, for cold water.
• On Christmas day, churches in China are mostly decorated yellow and red, while in Germany, they are decorated white. In a Chinese church, there is no collection box during ceremony. In Germany, you need to be prepared to give during and at the end of worship. Indeed, travelling is an adventure.
• At conferences, Chinese officials and company representatives are more flattering, while in Germany they talk more about figures, data, facts.
• In the West, they use Twitter, WhatsApp, Instagram and others, while Chinese have WeChat and Weibo.
• In China, when stock markets blink red, it means prices are going up, green means prices are going downhill.
• Magnetic compass needle in China shows to South, whereas Western compass points to North.
I am looking at my watch; it is six o'clock in the morning. I hear
