his paw prints on the kitchen floor? There is so much about this new world I don’t understand. The Black & Decker jump-starter, which I was so thrilled to be “charging,” quickly discharged as soon as I disconnected it from the Honda Generator. I was hoping I could have some light in my room with it. Nothing in this world makes sense to me. How can batteries not hold a charge? What has happened? This is all over my head; I just feel like giving up sometimes, Diary. Sometimes, I feel like taking this .38 and ending my suffering, but I can’t do that. I have a sense of purpose now, only I'm not sure what it is.
I plan on staying home for about a week, maybe longer. I am still worn out from the Atlanta trip, but plan on eventually going west…on I-10 to New Orleans…or what is left from it after Hurricane Ethel. Then on to Houston and maybe to Los Angeles. Maybe. I just wonder if I can hold up on that motorcycle with that kind of trip. I don’t know…I just don’t know. But when (or if) I do make that trip, it will be my last. If there was any trace of civilization, I think I would have seen it by now. It’s been almost two weeks. I have got to consider the impossible….the little nagging thought that keeps buzzing around me like a mosquito…the thought that I am completely alone…on Earth. If that is the case, then I have to ask the next question: Why me? Why was I allowed to survive over billions and billions of people? And what is this…blackness, for lack of a better name, that wants to consume me, to devour me? Or is this my imagination? I have a feeling...a bad feeling...I’m going to find the answer to those last two questions...soon.
Alone on Earth – Entry #14
November 29, 2016
08:37AM
Dear Diary
I will miss fried eggs. I have about three dozen eggs that were in dry ice, but they are all spoiled. So, unless chickens just fall from the sky, my days of receiving my daily intake of cholesterol from eggs is over and done. So, it was sausage links, sausage patties, grits, hot coffee, candied apples…reminded me of the breakfasts I had at Cracker Barrel. I never ate those candied apples when the waitress would bring them at Cracker Barrel. Oh, how I wish I had that opportunity again. I also had some toast, but it was stale and some of it was moldy. I could consider that my penicillin intake for the month. I doubt I will have to worry about penicillin though. I would make a bet all bacteria has evaporated also; that is just a hunch on my part. I suppose I could go to the library and look up how to make bread, getting flour won’t be a problem. But that is the extent of my knowledge in making bread. Enough of this, I have to get this day started, since I woke up late! I need to go into Axis and look around for anything I might need.
11:42AM
Dear Diary
I took the Suzuki ATV into Axis, since it carries so much more than the Honda Gold Wing. I still go through hell push starting the bike and the ATV, but I have no choice. I found a pallet of bologna in one of the remaining pallets in Mr. Atkins Meat Market. I always hated it, now I have a feeling I’m going to learn to love it. Mr. Atkins was a wonderful man, who would give credit to many folks up this way who couldn’t pay right away. Mr. Atkins kept many a family from starving. It’s not fair that someone like him didn’t survive and I did. I have the ATV loaded with more canned goods. I also have a small trailer that I attached to the ATV. It has been slow going…top speed has been about 15 MPH. I am going to search some of the homes nearby before I take off back home.
12:49PM
Dear Diary
I have been to several homes here in Axis; all of them are in the same condition, as if people just up and left suddenly. Again, purses, wallets, eye glasses - all essential items - were left either on the table or on the floor. None of this makes sense. One thing in one of the houses really caught my attention. I reported in an entry while I was in Atlanta that a department store had crucifixes lined up at the entrance of the store, so something had really scared those people. I found the same thing at the Mike Chinow residence, where I walked into the house to find crucifixes at the door…and two bibles on the couch. What does this mean? What scared these people? I was only six miles down the road. I was only concerned about getting beaned by falling birds on the 16th. On the 17th, I was confused. I was scared. I’m much more scared now though. I’m like a rudderless ship…
4:08PM
Dear Diary
As the days go by since The Event, I become more and more confused. I have more and more questions, but can find no answers. My life is suddenly more complicated than at any other time, including since The Event took place. I just don’t know in which direction to turn. I have found evidence that something…something terrible scared people, but I had no inkling that something sinister had happened. Sure, the power outages, birds falling from the sky…that was all scary as hell. I do think the blackness that has been watching me (at least, this is what I sense) is the most likely reason for these people being frightened to the point of putting crucifixes out to protect them from…whatever this blackness is. I don’t even feel like putting forth the effort to cook dinner, but I have to. Tonight, I will grill pork chops and round steak on the charcoal grill. I will utilize the hot plate to fix up some more mashed potatoes and gravy. More green peas, more butter beans, courtesy of the Axis General Store. I’m already sick of them. I’ve got to go back to Mobile and bring different food.
8:23PM
Dear Diary
I am so lonely. I always loved my privacy. But if I ever got lonely, I could always visit relatives or friends. I can’t do that now. I drink my wine more and more to ease the pain of this world. This world, in which I am encased like a mouse in a maze, is one of total silence…total boredom…total fear. If the wind blows too hard, it scares me. I get mad at myself for stupid things like waking up later than I did before The Event. I know the overall impact of this calamity is affecting me mentally. I do talk to myself a lot, Diary….other than you. If not for you, Diary, I would completely lose my mind. I keep thinking back to Tom Hanks in the movie “Castaway.” I wonder whether……..my friend Mr. Blackness is back. I sense him…or “it.” I’m sick of this sonofabitch…I’m going into the woods and look for him, bringing my Remington rifle and .38 with me. Time to end him…or me. This may or may not be my last entry. God help me, but I’m going after…”it.”
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