“And given your current school, the Storian thinks you’re the villain in that fairy tale.”
“And I should care about the opinion of a pen?” Sophie said, whittling nails on her other hand.
“I take back the quick-study bit,” said Anadil.
“If you’re the villain, you die, you imbecile!” Hester barked.
Sophie broke a nail. “But the School Master said I could go home!”
“Or maybe his riddle’s a trap.”
“He’s Good! You said it yourself!”
“And you’re in Evil,” said Hester. “He’s not on your side.”
Sophie looked at her. Anadil and Dot had the same grim expression.
“I’m going to die here?” Sophie squeaked, eyes welling. “There has to be something I can do!”
“Solve the riddle,” Hester said, shrugging. “It’s the only way you’ll know what he’s up to. Plus your ending needs to happen soon. If you win one more challenge, I’ll kill you myself.”
“Then tell me the answer!” Sophie yelled.
“What does a villain never have that a princess can’t do without?” Hester mulled, itching her tattoo.
“Animals, maybe?” said Dot.
“Villains can have animal henchmen. Just takes deeper corruption,” said Anadil. “What about honor?”
“Evil has its own version of honor, valor, and everything else Good thinks they invented,” Hester said. “We just have better names for them.”
“I have it!”
They turned to Sophie.
“A birthday party!” she said. “Who would want to go to a Villain Party?”
Anadil and Hester stared at her.
“It’s because she doesn’t eat,” said Dot. “Brains need food.”
“Then you must be the smartest girl alive!” Sophie roared.
Dot glared back at her. “Remember the cruelest villains die the cruelest deaths.”
Sophie turned to Hester nervously. “Would Lady Lesso tell me the answer?”
“If she thinks it’ll help Evil win.”
“You’d have to be clever,” said Anadil.
“And subtle,” said Hester.
“Cleverness? Subtlety? That’s what I do, darling,” Sophie said, relieved. “This riddle is good as solved.”
“Or not, given we’re fifteen minutes late,” said Dot.
Indeed, the only thing chillier than Lady Lesso’s frozen classroom was the looks she gave the four girls as they slipped through the door to their seats.
“I would send you for punishment, but they’re occupied with students from my last class.”
Boys’ screams echoed from beneath their feet. The whole class trembled at the thought of what was happening in the Doom Room.
“Let’s see if our latecomers can redeem themselves,” said Lady Lesso, heels clacking ominously.
“What are we doing?” Sophie whispered to Hort.
“She’s testing us on famous Nemeses,” Hort whispered. “If you get a question right, you get one of these.” He flaunted a massive stick-on wart glued to his cheek.
Sophie recoiled. “That’s a reward?”
“Hester, can you name a villain who destroyed her Nemesis with a Nightmare Curse?”
“Finola the Fairy Eater. Finola the Witch haunted the fairies’ dreams and convinced them to cut off their own wings. With the fairies no longer able to fly, Finola caught and ate them one by one.”
Sophie swallowed whatever came up. But she had never heard of Finola the Fairy Eater, so Hester had surely gotten it wrong.
“Correct! Finola the Fairy Eater! One of the most famous stories of all!” Lady Lesso said, and stuck a giant wart on Hester’s hand.
Famous? Sophie wrinkled her nose. Famous where?
“Anadil, name a villain who killed their Nemesis using disguise!” Lady Lesso said.
“Rabid Bear Rex. Dressed himself in a bear skin because Princess Anatole loved bears. When she tried to pet him, he cut her throat.”
“A great role model for us all, Rabid Bear Rex!” said Lady Lesso, and planted a wart on Anadil’s neck. “If he was alive, he’d wipe that grin off every one of Clarissa’s gloating cockerels!”
Sophie bit her lip. Were they making this all up?
“Dot. Name a villain who murdered their Nemesis with transformation!”
“The Frost Queen! Turned the princess into ice and put her in the morning sun!”
“My favorite tale of all!” Lady Lesso thundered. “A story that will live forever in the hearts of—”
Sophie snorted.
“Is something funny?” said Lady Lesso.
“Never heard of any of these,” Sophie said.
Hester and Anadil sank in their seats.
“Never heard of them?” Lady Lesso sneered. “These are Evil’s greatest triumphs! The glory that inspires future villains! Four Girls in a Well! Twelve Drowned Princesses! Ursula the Usurper, The Witch of—”
“Never heard of those either,” Sophie sighed, combing back her hair. “Where I come from, no one would read a story where Evil wins. Everyone wants Good to win because Good has better looks, nicer clothes, and more friends.”
Lady Lesso was speechless.
Sophie turned to her classmates. “I’m sorry that no one likes you and you never win and that you have to go to school for no reason, but it’s the truth.”
Hester pulled her robes over her face.
Dot leaned forward and whispered into Sophie’s ear. “The riddle, love.”
“Oh, yes,” said Sophie, all business. “While I have the floor, here’s a bit of a brainteaser. It’s quite important that I solve it, so any help would be deeply appreciated. What does a villain never have that a princess can’t do without? Any ideas? Feel free to shout them out. Merci, darlings.”
“I
