“Yeah, I hate that.” With a sudden burst of energy, Timothy exclaimed, “Did you see the black Saddlebred buggy horse that the Yoders donated to the sale? She’s a beautiful mare and Joshua says completely road trained.”
I smiled, picturing the horse. Throughout the day, I’d found myself back in front of her tie stall several times to admire her.
“I’m planning to bid on her. I need a new buggy horse more than anyone in the community at the moment. I hope the others will keep the price down for me to get her.”
“Will your father help out if she goes higher?”
“He said he would—but not a large amount.” Seeing Suzanna and Miranda approach, I teased, “Here comes trouble.”
Timothy’s smile made me think about my feelings for Rose and how I’d love to see her walking up to me. Unfortunately, we’d have to wait awhile longer for such a display. I purposely hadn’t mentioned the dinner and auction to her. It would be difficult to deal with my emotions in front of everyone in the community if she was nearby—especially the Schwartzes. I shivered at the thought of Rose and Constance coming face-to-face.
“Hello there. What are you boys up to?” Suzanna said as she stopped a couple of feet away from us. She was careful not to touch her boyfriend or say anything that could be overheard as being inappropriate. As usual, Miranda stood quietly staring at the ground. Even when Matthew, her own boyfriend, was beside her, she rarely spoke.
“We’re just talking. Judging by your wicked smile, I’m almost afraid to ask what you’re thinking,” Timothy said with a tight face.
Suzanna’s grin turned into a full-blown smile as she looked at me. “You don’t have to worry about a thing, Timmy. It’s Noah we came to talk to.”
“What now?” I asked with a sense of dread.
“Rose is here.”
My heart skipped, and I caught my breath. I was both elated and terrified at the same time.
“Where is she?”
“She’s eating dinner with her younger brother at the tables. She’ll meet you in her truck when darkness falls.” She pointed to the area where the cars were. “It’s parked in the back.”
I didn’t want to be rude, given her obvious excitement at having helped arrange a meeting between me and Rose, and I smiled back and said, “That’s wonderful news. Thank you.”
But inside I was reeling.
15
Rose
My eyes darted around nervously. I couldn’t eat any of the food on my plate for fear I’d throw it up in front of the entire community. Instead, I nibbled a bite here and there and pushed the mashed potatoes around with my fork.
“You really should eat something. The chicken is excellent,” Justin said as he shoved a forkful into his mouth.
I whispered, “You know why I can’t, so stop bugging me about it.”
In a very matter-of-fact way, he said, “You’ll die if you don’t eat.” He lowered his voice and added, “You need to for the baby’s sake, you know.”
“Shhh.” Frustration pricked my insides, and I took a deep breath before I whispered, “I do eat, just not very much at a time and certainly not around a bunch of snoopy people.”
“How long is this going to take? I have friends coming over tonight.”
I looked at my little brother sternly. His eyes were puffy from lack of sleep, and his skin was pale. Normally, when he got out of the house into the fresh air, he was a good-looking fifteen-year-old, but today he was suffering from some serious Xbox fatigue.
All of our lives had changed so dramatically since Mom’s death. She’d never allowed Justin to sit around in front of a TV all day gaming, and she’d never have put up with Sam’s arrogant, bossy ways, either. Most importantly, if Mom were here, I wouldn’t be pregnant—my life would be completely different right now.
But she was gone, and our lives were upside down.
“You promised if I bought you those pizzas for later, you’d come with me tonight.”
“Yeah, I did and I’m here, but we didn’t negotiate how late we’d stay,” he said with a sly grin.
I rolled my eyes. “I already told you, until after dark.” Glancing up at the pale sky, I figured the sun would set in a half hour or so, and suddenly my heart began pounding like crazy that I was about to see Noah.
A soft squeeze on my shoulder brought me around. Ruth Hershberger stood above me with a huge smile on her chubby face. The swell of emotions was too great, and even though I’d rehearsed this moment in my mind several times already, tears began streaking down my cheeks.
When I rose, she pulled me tightly into her cushy body and stroked my hair, which was loose and free. I was suddenly self-conscious that my hair wasn’t beneath a cap, and I smoothed it down when she released me.
Ruth’s eyes were shiny with moisture, but she smiled. James, Ruth’s husband, stood a few feet behind her. He was in quiet conversation with another Amish man, but he paused to look my way and nod at me. My chest tightened at the quick acknowledgment.
Ruth took my hands into her warm ones and said, “How are you, Rose? Have you settled back into your old ways?”
The questioning look in her eyes couldn’t be mistaken. There was hidden meaning in her words.
I glanced around, noticing several pairs of eyes dart away when my gaze passed over them. Everyone in the community was aware that I was here—and they were all waiting to see what happened next.
Nervous energy filled me when I said, “I’m planning to come back. I have to wait until I turn eighteen in the fall, but that’s what I want to do.”
I was partially aware of Justin’s eyes narrowing, but I ignored him to watch the look of shock pass over Ruth’s face. I understood Justin’s feelings, but I couldn’t worry about him right now. I had too much going on in my life.
“My dear girl, I wasn’t expecting you to say such a thing. I thought that being in your old life would have changed your mind.” She paused and searched around, before lowering her voice and leaning in. “Especially now that you aren’t courting Noah Miller...unless there’s something else you’d like to tell me.”
Her probing eyes brought me to my senses. Ruth was too sharp for her own good. I wanted to do this Noah’s way and help his sister out in the process. The last thing we needed was for the older women to be gossiping about our business. As much as I respected and cared for Ruth, she was still one of authority.
Thinking quickly, I said, “Oh, no, there are no secrets these days. I’m going to do as my dad wants and give my world another chance before I make a definite decision.”
She nodded and brought me back into a quick hug. She whispered in my ear, “You’re always welcome
