That smile made him regret the past, making him not so sorry about the present or the future. But nervous. Yeah, still nervous.
“You looked like a thundercloud,” Oregon responded, and he blinked.
“What does that mean?”
“You were sitting there all calm and gentle giant-like, and suddenly you became a rumbling mountain about to erupt.”
“I didn’t realize.”
“No, I’m sure you didn’t. You rumble. It almost sounds like a growl. And I’m sure Lilly is wondering why.”
He leaned back in the seat, the vinyl cushion lumpy from overuse, ripped a bit in one spot. He’d have to fix that. Oregon kicked him again, this time without the power of that first time. He opened his eyes and looked at her.
“I was thinking about the fact that I just got this kid, and in the next few years she’s going to become a young lady,” he admitted, feeling all kinds of insecurity that a grown man shouldn’t feel. “And she’ll, well, she’ll date. Boys. I’ll have to hurt them.”
Oregon laughed, the sound so easy and warm that it slid over him like summer rain. He soaked it up, like a man dying of thirst who hadn’t even known he was thirsty.
“Yes, she’ll date. And you won’t hurt them.”
“What if she brings home a guy like me, the way I was at sixteen or seventeen?” He grimaced at none-too-pleasant memories. “At twenty.”
“She’s not me, and she isn’t going to date anyone like you. She is loved and secure, and I hope she’ll make better choices. And I’m not going to let her randomly date every boy that knocks on the door or calls. Or texts.”
“Gotcha. But I can be there.”
“And intimidate them?”
She glanced at his interlocked fingers, and he made an effort to relax his hands.
“Never.” He grinned as he said it. Something inside him loosened a bit. At least Oregon had time on the job, as a parent, as a mom.
He wondered if she would resent his participation. Maybe now was the time to talk. They hadn’t talked much since he’d taken them home yesterday. No, yesterday had been more about telling Lilly, and then watching her shut down and wondering how to fix everything.
“I want to be a part of her life, Oregon. I want to be more than the neighbor, the guy who watches her grow up. I want to be a father to her.”
“I assumed you would.” Her voice was easy, only a hint of tension. “That’s why I came here, Duke. I know I should have told you sooner, but it wasn’t that easy. Once I got here, I realized that bringing you into her life meant bringing you into mine. It just wasn’t as simple as I had convinced myself it would be.”
“Eventually we have to talk about why you made the decision now, after twelve years of parenting alone.” Because he knew there had been something that pushed her to come here, something to change her mind.
“It’s a long story.”
“That’s just your way of saying none of your business, right?”
“No, not really. It’s just a long story.”
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