was willing to make an exception to my no-caffeine rule to get me through that meeting.
When it came to my comfort and enjoyment, reviews were on par with smear tests. True, no tears had been shed during them in the entire six years I’d worked at Nutritious. Yet no matter how hard I worked, I’d never been more than Adequate. Five grades to choose from and my boss always put me in the middle. What kind of motivation was that? Adequate was a nice way of saying meh. It was so-so, a verbal shrug. They claimed it meant I was doing everything I was supposed to. It meant they had no complaints. Was it any wonder I always walked away with a sense of disappointment?
But today I was going to make my stand (not my normal modus operandi). I knew I was better than adequate. I just had to grow the meatballs to tell Cressida why.
Alex made me wait until our steaming takeaway cups were in hand before pulling a small white envelope from his jacket pocket.
Inside were two tickets for the orchestra at the weekend. ‘Wow, thank you!’
‘You mentioned that you like classical music, and there were some extra tickets going, so I thought …’ He grinned, watching my expression.
‘I’d love to, thanks!’ I nearly dropped my coffee as I lunged to hug him. It was an unusual feeling, and, being honest, slightly awkward. ‘I had no idea you liked the symphony. You never said.’ I added that to the list of his perfect man credentials.
‘That’s because I can’t stand it. I’d lose the will to live halfway through the performance. I thought you and Ellie could go. Like I said, we’ve got the extra tickets so someone may as well use them.’
Then this wasn’t a date. It was a nice gesture from a work colleague. ‘Well, thanks very much, I’m sure she’d love to. Really, this is very kind of you.’ I kept my voice bright to hide the disappointment that suddenly hit me.
How much longer was I prepared to let this stupid crush go on? Snap out of it, Katie. Perhaps it was time to heed six years of evidence that he’s not into you.
I’d got some perspective again by the time we reached the office. Alex had, after all, remembered that I liked classical music. And he had thought to give me the tickets. Those were the actions of a friend. So he wasn’t interested in me romantically. I could live with that. I had lived with that for over half a decade. And we were friends, of a sort. No, I wouldn’t call him to discuss weekend plans (although this was mainly because I didn’t have his phone number, not because I exercised any restraint), but we were friendly. It was time I let that be enough.
The office kitchen was abuzz an hour later when I went in to microwave my cooling coffee. A large dark chocolate cake sat on the table. Next to it was an envelope, scrawled with the invitation to Help yourselves you greedy sods. A few people had hacked into it, revealing layers of chocolate sponge held together with creamy cocoa icing. My mouth watered.
‘That looks delicious!’ I said to my colleagues. ‘Have you tried any?’
Mark and Matt both nodded.
‘I’m having seconds!’ said Stacy, our HR bod. Everyone called her Racy Stacy behind her back, thanks to her talent for seducing most of the men in the office. She stuck her finger into the slice she’d just cut, licking the icing off while Mark and Matt tried to calm their erections. ‘Mmm, I could swallow the whole thing.’
I had no doubt about that.
‘Are you having any?’ she asked me.
‘Oh, no thanks. I’ve got my cappuccino here.’ I waved my unsatisfying-by-comparison drink, determined to practise what I preached since quitting Slimming Zone. ‘That’s my treat for the day.’ Moderate Katie, that was me.
‘You’re doing it right,’ she said. ‘My cousin lost thirty pounds just by cutting out carbs. They’re really bad for you.’ She forked in another bite.
‘Exercise helps too,’ said Matt. ‘I can eat anything as long as I run. You should try running, Katie.’
‘Swimming is better,’ Mark said. ‘There’s less strain on the joints, so anyone can do it, regardless of their siz— fitness.’
I smiled politely while my colleagues debated the best ways to slim me down, while shovelling in more cake. The fact that I hadn’t asked for their advice never occurred to them.
I tried to calm my nerves as I walked towards the conference room, where Cressida waited with my employee file. She was an okay manager (some might say Adequate), and generally a nice lady.
‘Hey, all right?’ she said, smiling through the bright red lipstick she always wore. She was a fit woman of a certain age who’d been with Nutritious since it was founded twenty years ago. She was always impeccably presented. Her makeup never wore off, her hair stayed where it was supposed to and her chin didn’t sport the stubborn hairs the rest of us worried about when the sun shone.
‘How was the meeting yesterday?’ Cressida asked.
Our company liked to keep us abreast of the latest ways to legally harass people. Everyone else had gone to the sales techniques meeting.
‘Tuesday is my day off, remember?’
‘Oh, that’s right,’ she said vaguely. ‘I’ve been so tied up with reviews that I’ve been a total scatterbrain. So, you know the drill by now.’ I nodded. ‘We talk about how you’ve done these past six months … but first, there’s something else.’
I waited.
‘As you know, the company has been doing everything it can to get through the downturn. Unfortunately our revenues have still fallen off, so we have to make some adjustments. I’m sure you can appreciate that these decisions aren’t easy, and I wish I was able to give you better news, but Katie, we need to ask you to go down to three days a week. But that does mean that you can have Fridays off!’
She said this like she’d just given me a free holiday, not an unpaid one. I did a quick calculation to see if I could live on three days a week. I could, just about.
‘Is this permanent?’
‘Hopefully not!’ Cressida said, sounding relieved that I hadn’t burst into tears. ‘We’ll assess in a few months and if business has improved, we’ll look to bring people back on board.’
Sure they would. That’s what they said after cutting our hours last time.
‘After all, productivity will be affected with the reduced hours, so we don’t want to make these cuts,’ she continued. ‘Don’t worry about that though, we’ll adjust your objectives accordingly. Do you have any questions?’
‘Yes, one. Does this affect all the staff like last time?’
She shook her head. ‘Luckily we didn’t have to be that drastic, so we’re only forced to make some cuts.’
In that case, actually I had two questions. ‘Why me?’
‘It’s nothing personal, Katie.
