and that was the thing that drove him in his quest. “Even without my desire to be a better man, there’s the fact that a woman gave her life for me. Mel didn’t have to take the bullet meant for me, but she did. How do you ignore her dying wish to find and save her sister?”
All these days later, he could still smell the residue of gunpowder mixed with Mel’s blood. Jasper had foolishly tried intimidating Ben Perry, leader of the gang he was now pursuing, and Ben’s men had opened fire. Jasper should have died, but Mel shielded him. How does a man repay such a sacrifice?
Which was why he’d die before giving up on his quest for Mel. Everything in Mel’s life had been about giving her sister a better life. He owed it to her to save Daisy. Married to Emma Jane, Jasper accepted that his other dreams of home and family would be denied. But he would make something meaningful of his life.
“Sounds like some powerful motivation,” his father said slowly. “Just remember that when a man marries, his life is no longer his own.”
Jasper gave him a long, hard look. He’d already spent time living the life his parents wanted. Just when he thought he’d figured out what he wanted with his life, it seemed life had other plans. How was he supposed to balance his dreams with being a husband?
* * *
Emma Jane’s ears stung as she stood outside the dining room door. There was a reason for the saying that eavesdroppers never heard good about themselves. But this was more than just hearing bad about herself. Oh, Emma Jane knew that Jasper hadn’t wanted to marry her, even without overhearing his conversation with his father. But realizing that Jasper felt like she’d taken away his chance to do something meaningful with his life...
Suddenly she felt very selfish for wanting him by her side to protect her reputation. Jasper wanted to do good in the world, and he wanted to help people. For the first time, she truly heard him as he explained to his father what it meant to save this Daisy person.
Taking a deep breath, Emma Jane stepped into the room. “Jasper’s right,” she said, not bothering to enter the conversation gracefully. “He’s doing something important. Working to bring down a gang of criminals, and saving this woman, those things matter. I’ll still be here when he’s finished with his mission.”
She gave what she hoped was a convincing smile as she turned to serve herself breakfast. While the words sounded like the right thing to say, her stomach churned. It certainly didn’t feel right.
But what else was she supposed to do? Emma Jane couldn’t argue any of Jasper’s proclamations without being the worst kind of heartless, selfish woman there was. It already seemed wrong for her to have become his wife, even though she’d had good reason. Why add more selfishness to her sins?
Jasper and Mr. Jackson stared at her as she took her seat at the table.
“He might not come home,” Mr. Jackson said slowly.
Emma Jane shrugged and speared a piece of sausage. “He came home last night. He came home from the fire. Perhaps we need to put our faith in God and pray for his continued safety.”
It was a trite answer, but what else did Emma Jane have to give? She focused her attention back on her plate, methodically eating, though she had no appetite. It gave her something to do other than acknowledge the gazes focused on her.
Mr. Jackson coughed. “I suppose that’s true. The Lord has protected our Jasper many a time or two.”
Even without looking at him, Emma Jane knew Jasper was grinning.
“You remember that time I wanted to pet a bull?”
This got Emma Jane’s attention. She looked up at her husband, and sure enough, his face was lit up brighter than the midday sun.
“Your mother still needs smelling salts when you tell that story.” Mr. Jackson leaned in toward Emma Jane. “He wasn’t more than six or seven years old, and we were visiting friends at a ranch. Jasper saw the bull in the pen and thought that red coat of his was the prettiest thing he ever saw, and he wanted to pet it. Trust me when I say, never attempt to pet a bull.”
At this, the two men laughed heartily, and even though Emma Jane hadn’t been there, she could imagine the anger of a bull at having a little boy chasing him around and trying to pet him.
More importantly, though, she couldn’t help but feel a surge of warmth at Mr. Jackson’s attempt at trying to include her. He’d defended their marriage in talking to Jasper, and even though he’d also defended his wife’s cold attitude, Mr. Jackson seemed to be at least trying to be on Emma Jane’s side.
Of course, marriage wasn’t supposed to be about sides, but what else was Emma Jane supposed to think?
“It must have been something, Mr. Jackson.” Emma Jane smiled warmly at him, trying to show that she, too, was trying to make the best of a difficult situation.
“You really should call me Henry. We’re family now.”
Emma Jane wasn’t sure which warmed her the most, the genuine kindness on the older man’s face, or his use of the word family. Perhaps things weren’t going to be so bad, after all.
“Mrs. Jackson said...”
“Constance means well. It’s just as I was telling Jasper. Give her time, and she’ll warm up to you.”
Another expression of understanding. Yes, Emma Jane had to have hope that things could get better.
At that moment, Mrs. Jackson entered the room. “What is all this tomfoolery I hear in here?”
Emma Jane tried not to shrink back in her chair, though she did remain silent. Nothing good ever came of opening her mouth in front of Mrs. Jackson.
“Jasper was just telling us of his intention to continue working as a lawman. I expressed my concern, but Emma Jane rightly reminded me that we need to put our trust in the Lord.”
Being so endorsed made Emma Jane sit up a little straighter.
“How dare you!” Mrs. Jackson’s voice jolted Emma Jane back to reality. “If it weren’t for you driving him away by forcing him to marry you, my son wouldn’t be leaving us. And you try to explain it away with faith?”
Mr. Jackson put a hand on her arm. “Now, Constance, you know that’s not true. Jasper’s involvement in the situation is because he feels obligated to repay the woman who saved his life.”
“A woman of no consequence.”
Jasper rose from his chair. “I would be dead without her. Surely she deserves to be given some consequence.”
His dark eyes flashed as he looked from his mother to his father, then settled on Emma Jane.
She felt small under his scrutiny and, for a moment, hated herself for it. She had nothing to be ashamed of. Even if his mother seemed to think so.
“As for your comments about my wife...” Jasper swallowed as he glanced briefly at his father before bringing his full attention back on Emma Jane.
“She has not driven me away. On the contrary, I have not been the best of husbands by neglecting her of late. I only hope that she is willing
