to get back to work.’
‘Of course you do. As a single mother, your job must be very important to you. Babies are expensive, aren’t they? They need all sorts of things—nappies, clothes, toys—the list must be endless.’ He sighed. ‘It must be hard enough when the child’s father is around to share the burden but when you’re on your own—like you, Lucy—it must be a real problem.’
‘I manage,’ she snapped.
‘I’m sure you do. But why should you have to manage by yourself when the baby’s father should be doing his bit to help you?’ He stepped away from the door and there was something intimidating about the way he was looking at her now. ‘He does know about the baby, doesn’t he? I know you read about women who go off and have a baby without telling the father, but you wouldn’t do a thing like that, would you, Lucy?’
‘Isabel’s father has nothing whatsoever to do with you!’ she shot back, desperate to convince him that she was telling the truth.
‘Isabel. So that’s what you called her? Lisa couldn’t remember her name when I asked her what it was. She just knew you’d had a little girl.’ His voice had softened, the harshness replaced by a tenderness that made Lucy’s heart suddenly ache. Either he was a superb actor or he really was moved by the thought of her daughter.
Just for a moment, she allowed herself the luxury of imagining how he would react if she told him the truth about Izzy being his child. She could actually picture the smile that would light his handsome face and the way his eyes would fill with love for their daughter—as once upon a time she’d imagined they had filled with love for her.
The thought was like a dash of cold water, returning her with sickening speed to the reality of the situation. And the reality was that Connor allowed nothing to come before his precious career. Nothing had ever mattered as much and nothing ever would, neither a woman nor a child. The thought helped her harden her heart.
‘Is this leading somewhere?’ She gave him a mocking smile. ‘So far we’ve covered your schooldays, your meeting with Lisa, and the fact that I have a baby. So what else do you wish to discuss?’
‘Nothing very much. I’ve covered the main topics.’ He gave a throaty laugh. ‘Funnily enough, they’re all linked. Meeting Lisa was the start, you see, then came the maths. It was easy enough to subtract the months until I got back to the beginning, which was when your baby was conceived. Correct me if I’m wrong but I’d guess it was April last year. If Isabel is six months old, it would have to be around that time unless she was premature, and Lisa didn’t mention that.’
‘I’m not listening to this,’ Lucy began, but he carried on as though she’d never spoken.
‘So assuming that Isabel went to term that means April is right. A lot of things happened that April, as I recall. We spent a lot of time together, including that weekend in Scotland. In fact, if you factor in work—which brings me back to the maths again—then I’d say you had very little opportunity to see anyone else when you were spending so much time with me. Ipso facto, Isabel must be my daughter. Am I right, Lucy? Or have my powers of deduction failed me this time?’
Lucy didn’t know what to say. She couldn’t even claim that it was like having her worst nightmare come true because she’d never dreamt that she and Connor would have this conversation. Since the night they’d parted she’d not heard a word from him—not even a card at Christmas. He had walked out of her life and that had been it. Now she had no idea how to deal with what was happening and her confusion must have shown.
‘I don’t know what you’re planning on doing but, please, don’t bother trying to lie your way out of this. It would be a mistake, because I’m not in the mood to listen to any lies. We both know that Isabel is my daughter. She couldn’t possibly be anyone else’s.’
‘Why not? I could have been seeing someone else while we were going out together.’ She stared back at him, desperately trying to hold onto her control. She had no idea why he was even interested that he had a child but something warned her that no good would come of it.
‘Not you, Lucy. It’s not something you’d do.’
The certainty in his voice almost tipped her over the edge and she had to breathe deeply to control her panic.
‘Isn’t it?’ She gave a mocking laugh and was pleased to see his eyelids flicker. Was he having doubts about her faithfulness, wondering if she might have been two-timing him? She hoped so, she really did. Connor Mackenzie needed taking down a peg or two!
‘Are you sure about that, Connor? You might be able to account for a large proportion of my time that April but you weren’t with me every single minute, were you? There were a number of nights when you were working and I was off duty. Do you know with absolute certainty what I was doing on those nights?’
‘No, I don’t. I wasn’t keeping tabs on you.’
‘Exactly!’ She laughed again, playing the role of her life. It was vital she convinced him that he couldn’t be Isabel’s father. Nothing was going to hurt her precious little girl and if that meant denying Connor’s paternity, that was what she would do.
‘You haven’t the faintest idea what went on when you were at work. You didn’t really care. Your job has always come first and I don’t imagine it would have worried you if you’d found out I was seeing someone else.’
‘So who was he, then?’ His voice grated but apart from that he seemed unmoved by the fact that she’d claimed to have been having an affair while they’d been seeing each other.
Lucy felt a knot of pain twist her heart but she couldn’t afford to admit that it hurt to know how little she’d meant to him. ‘Just someone I met one night in a club.’
‘So it was a one-night stand—is that what you’re saying?’
‘That’s right. I haven’t seen him since and I don’t expect to. He was in Dalverston on business and there’s no reason to imagine I’ll run into him again.’
‘And does he have a name? Or didn’t you bother asking him that?’
He smiled at her, his white teeth gleaming, his eyes sparkling with what looked like amusement. Was he relieved to have been let off the hook? she wondered, feeling sickly. Glad that another man was the father of her child so that he wouldn’t have to worry about the responsibilities of being a parent? The thought was almost too much to bear, but she had to bear it for Izzy’s sake.
‘I don’t see what difference it makes what his name is. He’s not part of the equation, to use your own analogy.’
‘And you’re perfectly happy about that, are you? You don’t care that your daughter is going to grow up without knowing her father?’
‘A lot of children don’t have any contact with one or other of their parents these days. I’m quite sure that it won’t make a lot of difference to Isabel’s life.’
It wasn’t true, of course. She did worry about what her daughter was going to miss as she grew up. Her own childhood had been idyllic and she hated to think that Izzy wouldn’t enjoy the support that came from a secure family background. However, there was no way that she was prepared to admit that to Connor, especially when he’d accepted her story about another man so readily. If she’d fostered any hopes that he’d ever loved her, they’d just been completely dashed.
