a little more intently for Renee’s answer.
“I like being with you girls,” Renee answered diplomatically and John chuckled softly. She was breathing a little harder from the exertion and her cheeks bloomed prettily, not that she needed any help in that department, John noted with exasperation. Renee tried making small talk with Alexis and John admired her tenacity in the face of her daughter’s dark expression. “Remember that time we went to Kirkwood and—”
“No. I don’t.”
Alexis trudged ahead, her arms swinging with the effort as she put distance between them all. John heard Renee’s unhappy sigh and slowed his own gait so they were walking side by side.
“She’s pretty headstrong,” he said, needing to say something that might put Alexis’s rejection into perspective.
“Always has been. But she used to be on my side,” Renee said. “She’s not the kind of kid who forgives or forgets easily.”
“Would you want her to be?”
“No. Not really. I’ve always felt that Alexis had a good head on her shoulders. That life wouldn’t tip her over like it did me. She’s always had the uncanny ability to see through the bullshit. I wish I’d had that talent when I was young.”
John wondered at that statement. He was slowly beginning to realize that Renee’s past may well be a chaotic one. Shrugging, he said, “She’ll come around.”
“I know. But it hurts to be on the outside.”
“Give it some time. She’s still getting used to having you around again. But she misses her mama and that’s the truth.”
Renee looked at him sharply. “Really? Did she say something?”
“Not in words. It’s a feeling. A hunch.”
Her expression fell and she sniffed. “Forgive me if I don’t put much store in hunches and feelings. My daughter hates me and goes out of her way to make sure I feel the sting of it every day. I would’ve been more hopeful if she’d actually admitted something to you.”
“You don’t always get what you want the way that you want it. Hasn’t anyone ever told you that?” He cocked his head at her, while Chloe tried to catch snowflakes. Renee smiled at Chloe but gave him a hard look.
“Of course I know that. I’m just saying—”
“And so am I.”
Silence stretched between them as they both processed what’d been said, and just as John was thinking he’d said too much and perhaps should’ve kept his opinion to himself, they arrived at the small hill John had had in mind.
“Are you sure it’s safe?” Renee asked, peering anxiously down the gentle slope as John put Chloe on her feet near her sisters. “I mean, it looks a little steep for the girls.”
John chuckled. “Chloe could go down this hill by herself. I’ll set up the track and then we’ll take turns taking the girls down. Okay? It’s completely safe. I promise.” And then he gave her a wide—almost daring—grin. Why? He hadn’t a clue but her reaction was worth the confusion.
RENEE FELT A SUBTLE JUMP in her heartrate at the smile playing on John’s lips and her imagination kicked into overdrive at the worst moment. Pulling her gaze away with obvious effort, she glanced back down the hill and then at her girls. “All right…I guess that’d be okay. How are you going to make the track?”
“That’s part of the fun. I’ll pave the way so that when we go down with the girls, we have something to stick to. Sort of like a road.”
She didn’t have a clue as to what he was talking about but she was willing to watch and see. “Be my guest, road master. Carry on. We’ll sit back and watch as you crack your head open.”
John’s bark of laughter surprised her and she smiled in spite of herself. “Watch and learn, city girl,” he said.
Were they—good Lord—almost flirting with each other?
Maybe a tad, a small voice answered, encouraging her to continue playing, which she obliged with little resistance.
“You say that like it’s a bad thing,” she retorted, her smile growing, then gestured. “We’re waiting…”
“Right. Step aside, females. Watch the Toboggan King work his magic.”
Renee laughed, enjoying seeing this different side of the man she swore she’d never like, and picked up Chloe. “I hope my cell phone works out here,” she said to her youngest daughter in a conspiratorial tone. “Because I sure as hell can’t carry him if he goes and breaks himself.”
John looked back at her. “Ye of little faith…”
Chloe giggled and pointed as John positioned himself on the sled at the top of the hill and shoved off. Renee gasped as he skimmed the snow and left behind a sleek trail that looked smooth as ice before slowing to a stop at the bottom, safe and sound and grinning from ear to ear.
Oh, he shouldn’t do that. Who knew there was a Colgate smile—blindingly white—hidden behind that stern scowl? It was as if she were seeing him for the first time and that was patently ridiculous but, hey, it was the truth and she was never much of a liar, anyway. Million watt. Straight, white teeth. What a killer smile. A lady killer, that is. She drew a shaky breath, fitted a tremulous smile to her own lips and tried to let the moment of insanity fade without drawing too much attention to the odd flutter and quiver she was feeling on the inside.
As he trudged back up the hill, he said, “I can’t believe I’d forgotten how much fun that is. Evan and I used to spend whole days crafting these amazing trails for the sled, going so far as to make jumps, too. Okay, who’s next? Alexis? How about you and me? We’ll show these kids how it’s done.”
Alexis, interest piqued in spite of her earlier bad attitude, agreed readily and climbed in front of John as he wrapped his arms around her to tuck his feet. “Hold on, this train is moving fast,” he called out as the toboggan started the slow descent and quickly picked up speed.
Renee laughed at the delighted shriek Alexis let out and John’s accompanying deep-throated laughter. A warmth that had nothing to do with her wool coat filled her and Renee, for a second, lost herself in the idyllic scene before her. She wondered why John never married and had a family of his own. He seemed to be a natural with kids, though at first glance she’d never have guessed by his surly attitude. John was an enigma that Renee had to admit she was fairly curious in figuring out.
Alexis and John made their way back up the hill, cheeks a ruddy pink from the cold, and for the first time since she’d seen her daughter again, she wore a smile instead of a frown. It lit up her features from within and her daughter’s natural beauty transformed her young face to one that would surely break hearts someday. Renee could only hope that her daughter wouldn’t make the same mistakes as she’d made, falling in love with the wrong man, giving up her hopes and dreams, and lastly, giving up on herself. Shaking off the sad thoughts, she focused on the joy of the moment and soon her spirits lifted as she watched Taylor hopping up and down. “My turn! My turn!”
“I’ll go down with you,” Renee volunteered, even though she was a little leery of the whole idea
