life and thought she had found the man to love her as much as she loved him.
It had been twelve months, and her heart was still numb and her mind racked with shame for almost tearing a family apart. A family she knew nothing about. She couldn’t come to terms with what had happened, nor could she settle her feelings and, as a result, herself geographically. Was she the victim? Or the perpetrator? She still wasn’t sure. But the one thing she was sure of was the need to keep moving. Although the disappointment she felt still followed her wherever she went. Disappointment in the man who had deceived her and deceived his wife. And disappointment in herself. She no longer trusted her own judgement.
The idea that she had been the other woman tore at her core. Upsetting thoughts about herself and how she should have known better had a way of creeping into her mind and pitching a tent. She felt physically sick when images of Tom making love to her crept back into her mind. The man who, unbeknown to her, had a wife and children waiting at home for him. Each time she moved town she hoped the change of scenery and distance from Sydney, where he was still playing happy family, would hasten some level of amnesia around her actions or perhaps just help her to find acceptance that she couldn’t change what had happened and allow her to move on. But that was yet to happen.
Dr Jessica Ayers would spend the next six weeks in a country town where she knew no one and no one knew her. Armidale was not her forever. It was just another stopover, a place where she could hide from the rest of the world until she knew what she wanted to do with her life. A life that would never have the happily ever after she had once thought she had all wrapped up with a perfect bow.
Jessica accepted there was no fairy tale ending for her. She would only have herself and her regrets...and the wish that one day she could learn to trust herself again.
But she doubted that would ever happen.
* * *
‘Oh, God. Oh, no.’ Lost in her maudlin thoughts, Jessica didn’t notice, until she felt the bump of her carry-on bag landing on the ground, that she had run over the man’s foot as she had struggled to get inside the terminal building. Looking down, she noticed the highly polished leather loafer with a damp imprint of her wheels. ‘I’m so sorry—I didn’t see you.’
‘It’s fine,’ the deep voice comforted her, adding, ‘I’m pretty sure nothing’s broken.’
She looked up to see the stranger’s lips curve to a half smile. She couldn’t help but notice his vivid blue eyes harboured a smile too. Jessica doubted that her actions would have brought about his reaction. Running over someone’s foot could not ordinarily incite a happy response. No, this man looked like someone who had found a bowl of cream and had been swimming in it. His happiness was palpable but she wondered how deep it ran. A new love affair, perhaps? His looks would no doubt have most women swooning. A player with his choice of women to keep that smile firmly secured on his chiselled face, she surmised with absolutely no evidence. She didn’t need hard cold facts. Dr Jessica Ayers was ready to judge then quickly hang, draw and quarter each and every man who crossed her path. But, despite her misgivings about the male population, including this stranger, she knew he deserved an apology.
‘No, really, I’m sorry. I should’ve been more careful.’
‘Accidents happen. Honestly, don’t give it another thought,’ he told her with that same smile that once again made his blue eyes sparkle like sapphires against his lightly tanned skin. Perhaps the happiness wasn’t a mask. It was emanating from somewhere deep inside. Resonating from his core, his very being, and it was the most genuine smile that Jessica thought she had ever seen. No, not thought, knew. Jessica had never before seen a smile quite like his.
Without saying another word, he walked away, leaving her standing alone and a little stunned, breathless and wondering what on earth had just happened. Looking down at her feet, she shuffled nervously as she tried to bring herself back to reality. And gain some perspective on the situation. A man about whom she knew nothing except he was handsome and had stylish shoes, now with an unfortunate wet tyre imprint from her bag, had taken her breath away.
Why would she be reacting to a complete stranger that way? Or any way? She should have dismissed him as she did all men, but she hadn’t. It didn’t make sense. There was something different about him. Perhaps his reaction, perhaps something else. She wasn’t sure. Edging closer to the baggage carousel, Jessica was a little confused about why she was giving the man more than her usual thirty seconds of considered disdain. Her curiosity about the source of his happiness lingered in her thoughts. It didn’t seem put on; it seemed so real.
The call for passengers travelling to Sydney to make their way to the departure gate suddenly brought her back to reality with a thud. The reason for the man’s happiness wasn’t her concern. She had enough on her plate without thinking about anyone else. She needed to collect her luggage and make her way to the real estate office to collect the keys to her rental. It would be a tight timeline as the office closed at five-thirty. But she couldn’t help but watch him walk over to the other side of the small terminal along with the other passengers. She told herself it was her need to find the luggage carousel and not curiosity that had made her eyes follow him. Gingerly she made her way there too. Looking around, Jessica saw families hugging, reunited lovers kissing and a few like herself standing alone with no one to greet them.
There was no one waiting to greet him either.
That she kept noticing him was beginning to irritate her. She assumed it was because he was the first person she had spoken to since arriving at her new temporary home and the first man she had run over with a suitcase. She was definitely overthinking everything she decided and purposely looked away.
Within moments an array of suitcases, predominantly black with an occasional colour variation dotted among them, and oversized backpacks began to push their way through the grey rubber flaps and onto the carousel. A pushchair appeared and even a surfboard. The terminal was too small to have a separate oversized items area. Quickly her fellow passengers retrieved their bags while still chatting to their companions. One by one they began to exit the terminal. She spun around and found the handsome stranger had gone too. She wasn’t sure why, but she wished he was still there. Strangely, his disappearance made her feel alone again.
Jessica pulled her concentration back to the job at hand. Finding her bag and doing it quickly so she wasn’t homeless that night. With concern mounting, she watched as the carousel emptied one case at a time until there were none in sight. And no one still waiting empty-handed like her. Her stomach fell as she moved closer to the rubber slats. She peered through to see no more bags waiting to emerge. Anxiously her eyes darted about as she chewed the inside of her cheek again. It was becoming a habit she knew she had to shake. Looking out to the tarmac through the expanse of floor-to-ceiling windows, Jessica could see the bags for the next flight out of Armidale being loaded into the plane. The same plane in which she had arrived. It was a one plane airport. There was no more luggage being taken off. She had to accept her bags had clearly never made it onto the plane in Sydney. Or they’d made it onto another plane heading for God alone knew where, the idea of which was far too upsetting for Jessica to consider at that time.
The only possessions she had with her were the contents of her handbag, her laptop and some notebooks tucked inside her carry-on.
A rising sense of loss surged through her and almost brought her to tears. She had no belongings...not even a toothbrush...nothing and no one in the world belonging to her.
Jessica was once again reminded that she was alone. In a strange town far from the place she’d once called home.
* * *
Dr Harrison Wainwright stepped from the Armidale Airport
