“I thought you did great. I was surprised a time or two because of things I had assumed.”
Lanier raised an eyebrow. “Like what?”
“I assumed they had extended the invitation to lunch. You came across as very confident, but I expected you to be nervous and antsy. When we’ve talked about your parents in your past, you always ended up crying your heart out.”
“It still hurts, but I’ve found constructive ways to try and deal with it. Not thinking about it all the time helps the wounds heal. I’m much happier, Dallas, and I am more confident.”
Lanier talked about all the things she’d done wrong in their relationship and how it had related to the pain of her past. “I couldn’t pull myself out of the fire back then. I took everything out on you, causing so many problems in our relationship. Unwittingly, I tried to run you out of my life. I expected you to also abandon me.”
“I’m glad you know the truth. I stayed because I love you, Lanier. I saw past your pain.”
Fighting off her tears, her gaze dropped down to the floor then back to him. “Do you ever think of getting a new girlfriend?” She grimaced. The words hadn’t come out right.
Dallas looked puzzled. “I’m perfectly happy with the one I have.”
Lanier grinned. “That’s nice to know. Still, I’d like to introduce you to a woman who is reinventing herself. You deserve the best.”
Dallas frowned. “Did someone slip something into your drink at the restaurant? You’re talking crazy. What’s happened to you?”
“You happened to me, Dallas Carrington.” Capturing his lips with hers, Lanier kissed him passionately. She then laid her head upon his chest. “Thanks for letting me know you’re happy with me. I couldn’t be any happier than I am when I’m with you. I’m the new woman I’d like you to meet. I’ve done so much work to try and improve me.”
Lanier hoped she wasn’t coming off as a lunatic.
Making a show of wiping his brow, Dallas smiled. “Now you’re talking my language. You had me worried there for a minute. I just happen to love the woman you are. Any improvements might be too much for this man.”
Lanier pursed her lips. “Hmm, I never thought of it like that.” She grinned. “But I think you’ll be very interested in meeting this person. The new and improved me, transforming by my own design.”
Wrapping her arms around Dallas’s neck, she kissed him deeply.
Dallas wiggled his brows. “A new you, huh? I guess I can agree to meet her, but only if you promise to send her away immediately if I don’t like her.”
“I promise.” Lanier gave Dallas her brightest smile.
He ran his thumb over her lower lip. “Are these the things you wanted to talk about?”
“It’s part of it.” Lanier wrung her hands together. “Lately, I’ve done a lot of thinking about my future. It feels so strange around here without the girls. I miss them.”
“They’ve grown up, Lanier, but they won’t forget you. Those girls are yours and Ashleigh’s for life. You two have created an unbreakable bond with the beautiful young ladies you helped raise.”
She wrinkled her nose. “I know. You know how I tend to second-guess myself. It just seems like I’ll be throwing them out in the street come fall. I’ve been where they once were and also where they’re going. I don’t want them to ever feel abandoned.”
Dallas pulled Lanier closer to him. “That won’t happen. They know what love is because of you and Ashleigh. You won’t lose a single one. Going off to college will be good for everyone.”
Lanier managed a half smile. “I hope you’re right.” She paused for a moment. “There’s something else I’ve also thought a lot about.” Her eyes narrowed slightly. “I’ve never lived alone. In every foster home I’ve lived in, there has always been at least five or six other kids.”
“I hadn’t thought of that. Once my brothers and I went off to college, we only came home for holidays and school breaks, no matter how much we missed our parents. After college, we bought our own homes.”
“How did Ms. Angelica cope with all of you leaving home at once?”
“Oh, she missed us a lot, but Dad constantly reminded her that we were no longer little boys. They’d raised us to become men. Setting children free is a normal part of life. Just remember that the girls might not have gotten an opportunity to go to college if they’d been placed elsewhere. Not all foster homes are like the one you and Ashleigh have created.”
“I know that, and it’ll eventually be okay. Once the girls are off to college, I think I should get my own place. Working and living here with the kids is all I’ve known since I resigned my social work position. I want to experience life on my own. I’m thinking of asking two of our assistants to move in here before any new kids arrive. I’ll still work here ten to twelve hours a day, but I want to be able to escape sometimes.”
Dallas sat up straight. “You’re serious about this, aren’t you? I didn’t know you wanted to live anywhere but here.”
“I didn’t either, not until recently. But I want to reinvent myself, so I need to make substantial changes in my life. I’ve never lived alone. Before I moved in with Ashleigh, I had college roommates. After graduation, I shared an apartment with two other women. Ashleigh lives at home and works here…and she’s satisfied with how well it works out. I’m excited about looking for a place of my own.”
Dallas liked the plan, but he couldn’t help wondering what this might mean for their relationship. He wasn’t sure if she was ready for a major move, but the one thing he didn’t want to do was put shackles on her dreams. She was a grown woman who obviously needed to be free.
“Would you consider living with me?” He knew he had said the wrong thing as soon as the words had left his mouth. He realized she needed to do this on her own and should’ve offered his support.
Massaging Dallas’s cheek with the back of her hand, Lanier’s heart raced. “I know why you asked that question. But please believe in me. I know what I want to do, and I know exactly why I feel that way.”
Closing his hand over Lanier’s, Dallas halted her nervous tapping. “I’m sure you do. And I do regret it—it wasn’t a supportive remark. You’re a big girl now and you can take care of yourself. If you can’t, I’m positive you’ll ask for help. Speaking of help, do you want me to help you find a place? I know the condo Houston bought a while back is empty and he doesn’t stay there nearly as much as he’d thought. Maybe he’d lease it.”
“Thanks, but I don’t want to lease from your brother. I’d like to live close to Haven House, not in downtown Houston. I’d love for you to house-shop with me.”
Dallas looked pleased. “Just tell me when you want to get started.”
“This weekend? When can you manage to get away for a few hours?”
“This is the playoffs, and game dates are set as teams advance. I’ll look into it. Hopefully, we can get you your own place before
