he tailed off.
I nodded, hoping he would get to the point soon. “Anything else?”
He clasped his hands and looked beyond me. “Erm… That’s about it, I guess. You’ll save me a dance on the night, won’t you?”
I laughed. “Of course.”
“I’d better go, they’re waiting for me.” His face was etched with concern. What had he really wanted to ask? Part of me didn’t want to know. Maybe I had to be more upfront with him, but what if I was presuming too much? Then I’d look a fool.
“I’ll walk you out.”
We joined Cruz and Amory outside once more. Both were bundled up and ready to find their very own dream house. Kai stood peering under the bonnet of Micah’s rust bucket of a car, while Micah tried to explain that he was sure it would work again if they just did this or that. Again, it was having some kind of mechanical issue, and I wished he’d scrap it and drive something more reliable.
The car diagnosis over, Isla started a tense discussion with Micah about what movie to watch on the upcoming movie night we’d been planning. Micah was deeming all of Isla’s suggestions ‘too girly’ – when in fact I knew he’d watched many a chick flick back in the day.
“Why don’t you guys go to Shakin’ Shack that night and leave us to it?” I said, diplomatically. There was no way I wanted our movie night ruined by men pretending to hate chick flicks!
“I’ve got Grease,” Isla said. “And a selection of other musicals. But the boys here seem to think that’s LAME, in big, fat, capital letters.”
We’d need donuts, and lots of them.
“Deal,” Micah said, laughing. “I’ll take the boys for burgers and you girls can snuggle up and dream of John Travolta sweeping you off your feet.”
Isla bumped him with her hip. “Oh, so you just so happen to know the star of the movie, huh!”
A blush crept up his cheeks. “No, it was… a lucky guess.”
“We’ll still think you’re manly if you admit you’re a fan of musicals, Micah,” Amory said, grinning.
Micah reddened. “Help me out here, guys.”
“We won’t judge you, Micah,” Cruz said, deadpan.
Micah swatted his arm and said, “Get outta here before I change my mind and we all watch it together.”
The gang burst out laughing and Micah’s color deepened. We used to watch musicals together a million years ago, and I couldn’t remember him complaining about our famous singalongs back then. The joys of your best friend being a girl, I suppose.
Timothy gave me a loose hug and took Amory, Cruz and little Scotty in his car to view cottages in Evergreen.
Isla and Micah waved them off and then walked back in the direction of the chalets. They were preparing them for the painters who’d arrive in the New Year.
“Make sure you light a fire, Micah,” I yelled after him. The chalets were ice-cold with the frosty breeze blowing off the frozen lake beside them. Kai and I left them to it, instead opting for the warmth of the lodge and a little hot chocolate to take the chill away.
Once I’d made a pot of cocoa we stood nursing steaming mugs in front of the potbelly stove, which belched its usual greeting. We sat for an hour, chatting, and then lapsed into silence.
“It’s so quiet,” he said suddenly. “No puppy, no banging of pots. It’s weird how you get used to a choir of sounds, until they’re gone.”
“I know,” I said. “The lodge is going to be so lonely when you all leave again. Isla has moved in with Micah, and Amory, Cruz and Scotty will no doubt find a nice cozy cottage, and you… you’ll be heading back to San Francisco. Soon it’ll just be me, rattling around the big old lodge again.”
And you and Bonnie Tyler will be back to sobbing into your wineglass. Shut up, brain.
Kai gave me an understanding smile. “It’s like we’re big kids at camp, having the most magical time, and then it’s going to be over, and become a distant memory that makes us smile. Cedarwood certainly gets under your skin.”
“It does…” It was bittersweet, hearing him talk in such a way. “I wonder what it’ll be like having real guests stay here? It’s not like I can force them out of bed to have coffee with me, or yell at them for leaving their clothes everywhere. I’m really going to miss having Amory here.” And you.
“You’ll get used to it. Soon you’ll be so busy you’ll fall into bed and forget you ever lived any other way.”
“I don’t think so. These times where we’ve shaped the lodge, and have all come together to make things happen… it feels so special, and so different. I don’t know how long I’ll have Amory and Cruz for, not really, and the same with Isla and Micah. And then there’s you. I just hope you’ll all come back some day. That we’ll make it a tradition to celebrate Christmas or New Year together.” I swallowed a lump in my throat. I wanted everything to stay like it was, right then, at that moment.
“Count me in,” Kai said.
“You’d come all the way back here every Christmas?”
“Why do you act so surprised?”
I shrugged. Kai could be so hard to read at times and I often couldn’t distinguish between what I wanted him to say and what he really said. “I just am.”
Quietly he turned to me and put a finger under my chin, tilting it up so we were gazing into each other’s eyes. “Clio, you have no idea how people see you, do you?”
“What do you mean?”
“People want to be around you. That’s why they come here and don’t want to leave. It’s not just the scenery, the picture-perfect setting, it’s you as well. You paint this picture of a different kind of life, and you sprinkle your magic dust over it, and they’re spellbound. People want to be where you are. Cedarwood has its own pull, but then there’s you…”
I let out a nervous laugh. “I…”
“You’re intoxicating, and you have no idea how special you are. When we were here renovating with the team, did you not see everyone coming to you every five seconds with inane questions they knew the answers to? Six phone calls from one painter, to query the color you told him a hundred times already? The way they tell you joke after joke just to hear you laugh?”
I double-blinked, sure he was making it up. The team was tight-knit, and we’d had a barrel of laughs. “They were just good guys.”
“They were. But you have this extraordinary power over people, Clio. You make them want to be in your spotlight. They want to be your friend, your confidante. Anything to be near you.”
I couldn’t reconcile the person Kai was speaking about with myself.
His finger smoothed a trace down my cheek and I felt myself lean in to his warmth. “Believe
