set profile, his brows down. “Why?”
“I didn’t know him.”
“He was a drifter.”
“Who came to work here?”
“Yes.” Anna knotted her hands, staring at them.
“He must have been special for you to fall in love with him.”
Wincing internally, Anna said, “I thought I loved him.”
The cab went silent, just the slow grind of the engine as Kyle guided the truck up and around a long curve. Up ahead was a large hill wreathed with evergreens.
“What do you mean you thought you loved him?” Kyle moved his gloved hand a little on the steering wheel, keeping his eyes on the slippery road.
“I was...young.” Her throat tightened and she didn’t dare look at Kyle or she’d burst out in tears.
“I didn’t know about it.” Kyle took a deep breath. “Only the divorce. I’m sorry, Anna. You deserve only happiness.”
Pain scored her heart. “A-after you left at twenty-two, I was lost, Kyle. I’m not blaming you. I know you asked me to marry you, but I just couldn’t...I couldn’t...”
He reached out and squeezed her arm for a moment. “It’s all right. I understood why you didn’t, Anna.”
Pain increased in her heart, and she wished his fingers would remain around her lower arm. “I wanted a family....”
“Yes,” he said, his voice thick, “you’ve always been a mother at heart. You’ve wanted a brood of kids since forever.”
She opened her hands. “I thought when Tom entered my life, that I could love him. That we could settle down. He said he wanted kids, too.” She touched her nose. A memory. “I believed him.”
“We fell out of touch after I left,” Kyle said, apology in his voice.
“I couldn’t email you, Kyle. It was—too painful.”
Nodding, he rasped, “Yeah, for both of us, but especially for you. It’s okay. I understand.”
“After a while,” Anna whispered, “I wanted to email you. But Tom discovered all the letters and emails you had written to me over the years from eighteen until you were twenty-two.... He was furious and jealous.”
Giving her a sharpened look, Kyle heard the anguish in her voice. “Jealous?”
“Very.”
“I took all the letters you’d written to me and hid them from him because I knew he would destroy them. He accused me of being unfaithful to him. Of loving you, not him.” Anna met his turbulent gaze. “I was twenty-seven at the time. We’d had a five-year marriage and I knew Tom wanted to leave me. I—I couldn’t get pregnant. I’d suffered two miscarriages earlier and he blamed me.... He said I still loved you and not him.” Anna flexed her fingers in a helpless gesture.
“Damn.” Kyle’s mouth thinned as he pulled up to the hill. There was a path that led up to the Scotch pine that grew on the rounded summit. Turning off the truck engine, he unbuckled his seat belt and turned, sliding his arm around Anna’s hunched shoulders. Her face was filled with misery. “I wish... I wish I’d known all of this, Anna.”
“Why?” She held his stare. “What good would it have done, Kyle?”
He frowned. “Because I’ve always cared about you, Anna. Growing up, we always talked. We were best of friends. We held one another’s secrets.” Kyle took his gloved finger and moved some of her long hair away from her ear so he could see her face. “I never wanted to lose that connection with you, Anna. Not ever. I’m sorry if you thought I didn’t care. I always have....”
Tears jammed into her eyes and she quickly swallowed them away. Just the grazing touch of his index finger against her hair sent sheets of prickles and pleasure through her. She pulled away, unable to handle Kyle’s contact. Because if she didn’t remove herself, she’d collapse into his arms, cling to him and never let him go again. “I know you care,” she whispered brokenly, pushing the door open, unharnessing and escaping.
Leaving the cab, Kyle picked up the saw in his left hand. The wind was chilly and he walked over to where Anna stood at the foot of the trail. “Come on,” he urged her quietly, cupping her elbow. “Let’s go find some nice Christmas trees.”
Every foot up that winding path, Anna recalled an earlier Christmas with Kyle. By the time they entered the tree farm, tears fogged her vision and she was no longer able to drive them away. Her elbow throbbed where his hand curved around it. She found herself wanting to stop, turn and throw herself into Kyle’s arms. Anna knew he would receive her. Kiss her.
“What about this one?” Kyle asked, halting. Releasing her elbow, he pointed to a six-foot Scotch pine to their left. “What do you think?”
Blindly, Anna moved toward it, not wanting Kyle to see her tears. With quick swipes of her gloved hands, she wiped the tears away. “I think it’s perfect,” she said. “Just the right size for that corner near the fireplace.”
Kyle got down on his hands and knees, positioning the saw.
Anna stood away, watching him work, the sawing sound filling the air around them. The snow was knee-deep and the wind was brisk. She pushed her hair away from her face, watching him make quick work of the trunk. In no time, the pine tipped and fell softly into the surrounding snow. Kyle grinned up at her.
“One down. One to go...”
Anna forced a smile. As she backed up, her boot slipped. With a startled cry, she threw out her hands, falling. In seconds, Kyle was there, catching her. He fell into the snow, bringing her on top of him, protecting her. Snow kicked up and flew all around them.
Anna’s hair was showered with glistening snowflakes as Kyle rolled her on top of him to break the worst part of their fall. He was warm and strong and his arms curved around her, holding her safely against him, taking the brunt of the impact. He grunted as he hit first. Automatically, she closed her eyes, surrendering over to him entirely, knowing Kyle wasn’t about to allow her injured and healing head to slam into the hillside. She utterly relaxed in relief against him.
“Anna? Are you all right?”
The urgency in Kyle’s roughened tone snapped her eyes open. Snowflakes settled against her hair and across her face. She felt the length of his body against her own, her breasts pressed against his jacketed chest. She gave a short, nervous laugh.
“Yes...I’m okay...really...” She started to struggle to get off him, but then made the mistake of drowning in Kyle’s narrowed gray eyes. His pupils were huge and black, reminding her of a predator that has its quarry sighted. Her heart banged violently in her chest as he eased her slowly off him, tucking her down beside his body, his arm beneath her neck and shoulder, cradling her.
The world came to a halt. Their breaths were shared raggedly between them. It was going to happen. Kyle was going to kiss her. And Anna wanted this more than anything else in her world. She reached up with her gloved hand, sliding it across his stubbled cheek, and watched Kyle’s eyes suddenly grow intense upon
