lodges. “I’ll walk you back.”
Wanting desperately to refuse, she scrambled for a reasonable excuse. But because that made her feel spineless, she tamped down her nerves and nodded. Without another word, she turned and headed briskly toward her building, leaving him to follow if he chose.
Seafoam Lodge opened into a beautiful courtyard filled with flowers, benches and a small koi pond with a center fountain. No one else was in the courtyard at the moment. Stopping beside the koi pond, Joanna pushed her hands into the pockets of the yellow sundress she wore. She tended to dress in tailored dark garments at the medical school where she taught in the rehabilitation department. She’d packed comfortable, breezy clothes for this vacation she’d foolishly predicted would be fun and stress-free.
Adam stood in front of her, looking strong, solid and all grown male even as the steady breeze ruffled his hair, lifting a cowlick very much like the one she’d smoothed on her son’s head earlier. Unwillingly assaulted by memories of running her hands over that long, hard body—and of him doing the same to her—she bit her lower lip.
The silence between them was growing oppressive, but Joanna left it up to him to speak first. She didn’t know what to say, but she also wanted to judge his state of mind. He appeared to be doing the same thing, which led to an awkward standoff. She caved first, motioning toward one of the benches nestled into the landscaping. “Maybe we should sit down.”
He lifted one eyebrow. “You really want to talk about this out here?”
As if in response to his words, a silver-haired couple dressed in tennis clothes and carrying rackets appeared from the direction of the courts, greeting Adam familiarly as they strolled toward the lodge entrance.
With a sigh, she conceded the point. “Let’s go up to my suite,” she said, aware that it was hardly a gracious invitation. Judging by his expression as he fell into step beside her, he understood why she’d spoken so curtly.
Her hand wasn’t quite steady when she swiped her key card. She led him inside, then crossed the room to open the French doors to the balcony. The living area was spacious enough, with comfortable seating, a big-screen TV and the kitchenette on the other side of an eating bar. Yet it felt vaguely claustrophobic with Adam seeming to take up so much room. “Why don’t we sit outside? The balcony should be private enough.”
After a momentary hesitation, he moved past her through the doors to the table where Simon had eaten his breakfast. He reached down to pick up something from one of the chairs, straightening with a slightly ragged stuffed dragon in one hand. “Almost sat on this.”
Their fingers brushed when she took the toy. She felt the impact all the way to her toes. She was aware of the heat in her cheeks when she took a too-quick step backward, but she hoped Adam didn’t notice. If he did, he had the tact not to mention it as he sank into his seat.
Settling into the chair across from him, she made a concerted effort to speak lightly, with an ease she was far from feeling. She was afraid if she let her composure slip now, she’d have a hard time reclaiming it. She set the stuffed dragon on the table. “This is Norbert. Simon’s usually more careful with him. I guess he was excited about the field trip.”
“So. Simon.”
Another faint tremor went through her, but she thought she controlled it better this time. She met his gaze. “I realized I was pregnant a few weeks after I returned home six years ago. It was quite a shock. I thought we’d been so careful. And before you ask, there was no chance that I was already pregnant when I met you. You were the only man I was with when he was conceived.”
A muscle twitched in his jaw, which she took as confirmation that the question had occurred to him.
She moistened her lips. “I named him Simon Eryk Zielinski. Eryk was my grandfather’s name.”
Adam pushed a hand through his wind-tossed dark hair, and she could see the tension that gripped him. They hadn’t exchanged a lot of personal information when they’d met before, but she’d assumed he was close to her own age. She was now thirty-three, but the passing years had aged him more. Not so much in appearance. He was as fit and as attractive, if not even more so, as he’d been then. But beneath the polite smile he’d worn among the resort guests, she’d detected a solemn gravity that hadn’t been present before.
She wondered again how he’d ended up working here, what else he’d done since she’d seen him last. She wondered what he was thinking. Feeling.
His stormy gray eyes met hers and she swallowed hard. For a moment, she felt a bit intimidated. Shaking off the feeling, she lifted her chin and squared her shoulders, waiting for him to speak.
“You didn’t really answer me earlier,” he said in a low voice. “Did you try to find me?”
She spread her hands. “You made it clear when you left that you weren’t interested in future contact. When I found out I was pregnant, I called the resort, but the woman in the office wouldn’t give me your information. Short of hiring a private investigator, I didn’t know what else to do.”
His eyes sparked and for a moment, she thought he was going to tell her that was exactly what she should have done.
She spoke forcefully again before he had a chance. “Do you remember what you said to me that first night, when we ended up in my bedroom after walking on the beach?”
He frowned as though he wasn’t sure where this was leading. “Not specifically.”
“You said there was no need to exchange contact information because you had plans that didn’t include a relationship. You made it clear a little vacation fun was all you wanted. As I told you then, I wasn’t looking for anything more, either. I figured the way you left proved you hadn’t changed your mind.”
He had the grace to wince at the reminder of the way he’d slipped out. “I had an early flight that day, and it seemed easier to skip goodbyes. Of course, I had no idea—”
She shook her head. “I’m not asking for an apology. You were never anything but honest with me. I was just as happy to avoid any awkwardness.”
Which was true, for the most part. Once she’d gotten past the disappointment of waking to find him gone, thinking she would never see him again, she’d decided he’d chosen exactly the right way to end things. The brief affair had been spontaneous, hot and fun, and it wouldn’t have felt right to wrap it up with a perfunctory hug or a bittersweet kiss. She’d told herself she didn’t regret a thing, that their time together would be a memory she would privately cherish for years to come.
Then she’d realized she was pregnant, and she’d known the memories wouldn’t be so easy to tuck away.
“I wasn’t apologizing,” Adam said curtly. “Did you really want me to leave with a handshake?”
She was taken aback by how closely his words echoed her own thoughts.
Their gazes held for several long moments. Was he replaying some of the same memories that had crept out of the past to haunt her now? Was he hearing sounds of quiet laughs and soft moans, of hungry kisses and exultant gasps? How many times had she woken in the middle of the night after dreams filled with the rush of the ocean and the touch of his hands?
Those rare but vivid dreams had taken her by surprise each time. She’d have sworn she’d long since put the weekend behind her. But then again,
