had convinced him that, despite all his mother had claimed about their marriage being arranged, she’d loved his father.
He would never be that weak. He would never open himself up to such pain.
‘The park is beautiful at this time of the year, is it not?’ He diverted his thoughts and the topic of conversation onto more neutral territory.
‘It is, even when it is so cold.’ She snuggled against him. Was she cold or getting too comfortable? ‘It’s lovely, thanks.’
‘A nice way to end our weekend, no?’ He felt her glance up at him, but he kept his attention firmly ahead. Was it possible she was reading more into this moment?
‘Yes,’ she said and walked on, looking anywhere but at him, convincing him he must have been mistaken. At least she agreed and there wouldn’t be any drama when they returned to their lives. This would be just a weekend affair.
* * *
Lydia breathed in the cold air, relishing the gentle breeze on her face as she walked, her arm linked in Raul’s, through Retiro Park. The soft luxury of his camel cashmere coat was warm and inviting, but not nearly as much as Raul. The wind was cold, but it focused her thoughts, stopped her from believing this affair would ever be anything more than just a weekend. One that was almost over. It had been a magical interlude, which had shown her what loving a man could be like, even though she knew this man would never allow anyone close enough to love him or to love himself.
‘We will go to London tomorrow.’ As if he’d sensed her thoughts, taken lead from them, Raul said the words that spelt the end of whatever it was that had happened between them since the night of the party.
‘So this is goodbye?’ She kept walking, looking ahead of her down the long tree-lined path, noticing the red squirrels that cheekily followed them from tree to tree in the hope of treats. Normally she would have remarked upon it, taken pleasure in such a moment, but not today—not now. She wanted to be as detached as he was, her words as emotionless and empty and, whilst she was happy that she’d achieved that, inside she was breaking apart.
‘Sí, querida.’ His Spanish accent was deeper than ever and the use of the now all too familiar term of endearment no longer irritated. She glanced up at him, his profile strong and unyielding. ‘It is time to return to our lives.’
She should be elated. Her father’s debts were to be cleared without the need to enter into a marriage more in keeping with the kind of historical novels she’d loved as a teenager. Tomorrow she would return to London and she and Raul would never have to see one another again. So why did that feel so difficult? As foolish as it was, she had fallen in love with a man who was as cold and incapable of love as his father had evidently been.
‘I will of course require written proof that my father’s debts are settled. I don’t want to be hounded again.’ The pain of her realisation made her lash out, made her want to hurt him too. But could you ever hurt a man so incapable of emotions?
‘Hounded?’ He pulled her to a halt and looked down at her, the spark of anger once again in his eyes. Inwardly she sighed. It seemed she brought out the worst in this man.
She lifted her chin defiantly; the barrier she usually hid behind, the one she had lowered over the last few days, slid perfectly back into place. He would never know her true feelings for him. Never. ‘Yes, hounded.’
He narrowed his eyes, their dark depths searching her face. ‘In that case, after tomorrow’s meeting with my brother, you will be pleased to know I will have no further cause to hound you, as you so nicely put it. Our engagement will be over.’
‘Then you should have this back.’ She pulled her arm free of his, the comfortable companionship of moments ago gone for good. It was for the best and, trying to push down the pain, she slid the engagement ring from her finger. ‘I have no need of it any longer.’
The expression on his face held a hint of that amusement she found so annoying but, even so, a twinge of regret raced through her. The last few days had been so different, the pressure to be anything but herself had disappeared and she’d felt more comfortable with him than she had with anyone. The thought of giving it up saddened her. Was what they’d shared over the last few days what being in a real relationship felt like? Was that the closest she would ever come to knowing love?
‘And I do?’ The imperious question held such command that the birds in the trees above them seemed to stop singing, as if waiting to see what would happen next.
‘Next time you need a convenient fiancée you will have the ring ready and at your disposal.’ All the hurt she’d felt echoed in her words, despite her trying to keep it in.
His eyes darkened with anger and with a satisfied smile she turned and began to walk once more. It took seconds for him to join her.
‘I had thought you were different.’
‘From what?’ She kept her voice light and flirtatious, determined he shouldn’t guess at the hurt that was lancing through her, the broken and unattainable dreams this weekend had brought to light.
‘From the spoilt little rich girl I first met at the dinner party. From the demanding woman who’d waited for me in the restaurant three weeks ago.’ The silky softness of his voice almost disguised the underlying disgust at just who he thought she really was.
‘Maybe that was part of the act.’ She didn’t look at him. She didn’t dare. She focused on the long path ahead of them, trying instead to wonder what the other people walking in the park were doing. Wondering if they were happy and in love as she’d almost begun to believe she might be. What a fool she’d been.
The night of the dinner party, when she’d first met Raul, she’d acted to a role she’d thought her father had wanted her to play. It had been one last futile attempt at bridging the ever growing gap between her and her father. It had also been what had made Raul look at her with distaste. From that moment onwards, she’d done as her grandmother had always advised and been herself.
‘You have acted your part of loving fiancée very well, querida. I for one was convinced.’ This time, a steely undertone reverberated in every word, but still she walked, not daring to look up at him and certainly not daring to stop, to have those dark eyes fix on hers and see the truth of her feelings for him.
‘It was what was expected, was it not, in order to convince the board that we were prepared to marry?’ She quickened her step. Maybe if they left the park they could leave this topic behind.
‘Then I applaud you. You even fooled me, especially when you were in my bed.’
She stopped and whirled round to face him. Didn’t he have any idea that these last few days had not been about the deal? They had been about letting go, being herself—being with him, the man she’d fallen ever harder for. How dared he bring that up, make it sound as if she’d bartered with herself, sold her body, just to clear her father’s debts?
‘At least you cannot deny I have kept my part of the deal.’ The angry words flew at him but to her utter annoyance her response amused him, serving only to make her even angrier.
* * *
Raul smiled as the glitter of anger sparkled in her eyes, far more dazzling than the ring she’d just given back to him. With the afternoon sun shining through the bare branches of the trees above them and then dancing in her hair, she looked so very
