“Married?” No other word came to his mind.
“Marry me and take us to Eden Valley Ranch.”
“Marry?” Still he was capable of saying nothing else.
Her eyes narrowed. “This is the Porters’ grandchild. Gordie’s child. Doesn’t that mean anything to you? After all they did for us? They gave us a family when our own were too busy.”
She was right, but he needed to see Mountain Mike and buy his ranch. The thought of his land seemed to ground him and allowed him to think sanely again. “But the place I’m looking to buy has only a tiny cabin. Only big enough for a man. Not two women and a baby.” Then again, if a man and a woman loved each other, the small quarters wouldn’t be a problem. A persistent hope sprang to his mind.
“I’m only suggesting a pretend marriage until we get there. Then we can have it annulled.” She widened her eyes as tears glistened in them.
A pretend marriage? Was such a thing possible?
“Must you look so shocked? Am I so unappealing?”
He managed to shake his head. Seemed the power of speech had abandoned him again. Then, seeing how she struggled to keep the pooling tears from overflowing, he started to reach for her hands. He stopped himself because he had no right. “Marriage isn’t like buying a ticket for the stagecoach. It’s a lifetime commitment.”
Her eyes pinned him with dark fierceness. “Only real marriages are forever. You don’t love me. I don’t love you. We both know it’s not for real.”
Her words scraped through his insides. A person couldn’t be much clearer than that about their feelings. Even knowing she was only asking to use him, he considered her request. Marriage gave him the right to tell Vic to leave Louise and Missy alone. He could protect her, get her to safety.
He nodded. “Very well. Let’s get married.”
She blinked and then blinked again. “Really?”
“You heard me.”
She sprang to her feet and rushed to his side to hug him. “Thank you. Thank you. You will not regret this. I promise.”
He hoped not. But already doubts had sprung from the corners of his mind. How could he pretend to do something that, a long time ago, he’d dreamed of?
Louise returned to her chair and studied Nate. He’d said yes without much of an argument. Why was he so agreeable? But she wasn’t about to guess at his reasons so long as he got them safely to their destination.
A fear clawed at her brain. He was in a hurry. Would he escort them all the way or leave them in some little way station to fend for themselves? After all, he was good at leaving. Seemed all the important men in her life were. Though Pa had made her be the one to leave, and Gordie and his parents had died. Each case was different, yet in her heart she viewed them the same. She’d been left before, so it wouldn’t surprise her if it happened again. Best she could do was be prepared for it.
She pressed her palms to her stomach. The funds she had would not last long and she’d have a new baby to care for besides watching over Missy. Resolve flooded her being. She could and would take care of herself. Had been since she could remember. Pa had expected it. When it got too much for him, he’d shipped her off to Aunt Bea, who likewise made it clear she didn’t care to bother with Louise. Only while the Porter parents lived had she found the sort of welcome she longed for. But Eden Valley Ranch promised refuge while she sorted her life out and decided what to do next.
Would she be refused refuge at the ranch for making a mockery of the wedding vows?
Please, God, just let us get away from Vic, then I’ll manage somehow. With or without Nate. Doubt again tugged at her heart. Would God refuse to help her because she meant to be untruthful about the wedding vows? As always, when doubts flared, she reminded herself of all that the Porters had taught her about God’s love and faithfulness. Surely God would understand, given the circumstances.
She realized she still gawked at him. “What now?” she asked.
He laughed, his blue eyes flashing with amusement. “This was your idea. Shouldn’t you be the one with things figured out?” Their gazes locked, just as their futures were soon to be bound together for a short time.
She jerked her attention to a worn spot on the table. “It’s a rather new idea and I hadn’t given the particulars much thought.” She paused a moment. “The stage leaves tomorrow.” After another hesitant beat, she added, “Early.”
“Then I suggest you get on with your wedding plans.” His eyes still twinkled.
“I think you’re enjoying my discomfort.”
He sobered. “No. But you must admit, it is a little amusing. A spur-of-the-moment wedding. The bride—” His gaze darted to her belly and he chuckled. “Some would think this is a shotgun wedding.”
Heat rushed up her neck, but she would not turn from giving him a steady look. “It’s Gordie’s baby. I don’t expect you to take care of it.”
His smile turned into a scowl. “Of course.” His gaze went beyond her and grew distant.
She wondered what he was seeing. Maybe someday she’d feel comfortable enough to ask. Right now all that mattered was he’d given his word and they were to be married. All she wanted from this relationship was to get away from Vic and gain safety for herself, her baby and Missy.
She didn’t expect anything more from him.
Nate got to his feet. “Seems we have a wedding to arrange. Why don’t I take you to Aunt Bea’s and you can tell her your plans.” He held out a hand to help her to her feet.
She might have refused, but it was getting harder and harder to get up gracefully.
He squinted at her. “When is this baby due?”
She understood the question he meant to ask. Was she going to deliver on the journey? Please, God, let me go a little longer. One week until they reached their destination. One week of pretend marriage and then the joy of her little son or daughter. She couldn’t think of a better Christmas present.
To Nate she gave a dismissive shrug. “Not for a while.”
His eyebrows rose. Then he let the subject go and opened the door his mother had closed a short time ago. “Ma, I’m taking Louise home. I’ll be back in a bit.”
They left the house and went to Aunt Bea’s house, pausing outside the door.
“I’ll wait until you inform her, then take you to your house,” Nate said.
“That won’t be necessary. Missy and I took what we needed when we left yesterday.”
He caught her shoulder and brought her around to face him. “You’ve left your house? Why?”
“Because Vic moved in.” The words were
