Brains Confounded by the Ode of Abū Shādūf Expounded. Yūsuf al-Shirbīnī

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Brains Confounded by the Ode of Abū Shādūf Expounded - Yūsuf al-Shirbīnī Library of Arabic Literature

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Abū ʿAwkal, and Abū Ḥawkal, Abū Habūl44 and Abū ʿAsqūl (“Father of a Heel Tendon”), Abū Rabābah (“Father of a Rebab”) and Abū Zughābah,45 Abū Ṭurayf and Abū Quḥayf (“Father of a Little Peasant Hat”), Abū ʿUraysh46 and Abū Kuraysh (“Father of a Little Belly”), Abū Fatīshah47 and Abū Dashīshah (“Father of Coarse Porridge”), Abū Qazaq (“Father of a Trolley”), Abū Qallūṭ (“Father of a Large Turd”), Abū Jaḥlāṭ and Abū Jīṣ (“Father of a Loud Fart”), Abū Kānūn (“Father of a Brazier”), Abū Muqallad48 and Abū Jaʿbāẓ.

      ١٥،٢

2.15

      (ويُلَقَّبوا) عِمْران القَلْط * وعُمَيْر الضَرْط * وعنطوز الباب * وشلاطه محلاب * ومحمّد القلّاب * وكُسْبُر العُقْله وبَرْبور الهَشْله ولهّاطة الزِبْله * ومشالي العجله * ونحو ذلك كثير لا غاية له

      Their nicknames49 are ʿImrān the Big Shitter (ʿImran al-Qalṭ), ʿUmayr the Fart (ʿUmayr al-Ḍarṭ), ʿAnṭūz50 the Door (ʿAnṭūz al-Bab), Shallāṭāh Milk Crock (Shallāṭāh Miḥlāb), Muḥammad the Flap (Muḥammad al-Qallāb), Kusbur the Knuckle-Bone (Kusbur al-ʿUqlah), Porridge-Snot (Barbūr al-Hashlah), Shit-Gobbler (Laḥḥāṭat al-Ziblah), Mashālī51 the Dung Cakes (Mashālī al-Jillah) and many, many more.

      ١٦،٢

2.16

      (ويجيبوا السائل) بلفظ هاه وهيه وايشمالك واي مالك وايه هاه ممّا هو مشهور بينهم

      When asked a question, they answer “hāh?” and “hīh?” and “Aysh mālak” or “Ay mālak” (“What’s up with you?”) and “ayh hāh?” and other expressions well known among them.

2.17

      (وأمّا أسماء نسائهم) من معنى أسمائهم فيُسَمّوا زعره وبعره * وهيطله وميكله * وخطيطه وحويطه * ومعيكه وركيكه * وشَباره وزراره * وعلاره وعباره * وشلبايه وعطايه * وعليوه وحليوه * وهديه وبليه * ولبده وغده * وشمة وبلمه * وسروه وبلاوه * وفسيوه وخريوه * ولقد رأيت خريوه هذه وسألت والدها عن سبب تسميتها بهذا اللفظ فذكر لي أنّها كانت في صغرها كثيرة الخرا وأي نقرة وجدتها تخرا فيها فاشْتُقَّ لها هذا الاسم من هذا اللفظ

      The names of their women are as bad as their own. They are called Zaʿrah (“Bobtail”) and Baʿrah (“Dung Pellet”), Hayṭalah and Maykalah, Khuṭayṭah (“Little Furrow”) and Ḥuwayṭah (“Little Wall”), Muʿaykah (“Little Rub”) and Rukaykah, Shabārah (“Nile Perch”) and Zarārah (“Gherkin”),52 ʿAlārah and ʿAbārah, Shilbāyah (“Catfish”) and ʿAṭāyah (“Gift”), ʿUlaywah (“Little Heap of Garbage”) and Ḥulaywah (“Little Sweetie”), Hadiyyah (“Present”) and Baliyyah (“Calamity”), Libdah (“Cap”) and Ghuddah (“Gland”), Shammah (“Sniff”) and Balmah (“Stupid”), Sarwah (“Cypress”) and Balāwah,53 Fusaywah (“Little Silent Fart”) and Khuraywah (“Little Piece of Shit”). I actually saw this Khuraywah and asked her father why he had chosen that word for her name. He told me that, when she was a little girl, she was always shitting and would shit in any hole she came across, so he coined a name for her from that same word.

      ١٨،٢

2.18

      (ويُكَنّوا) أم جعيص وأم عميص * وأم شليح وأم رميح * وأم عـرّام وأم زوّام * وأم شـقيره وأم صـقيره * وأم شواهي وأم دواهي *

      Their kunyahs are Umm Juʿayṣ54 and Umm ʿUmayṣ,55 Umm Shulayḥ56 and Umm Rumayḥ (“Mother of a Little Lance”), Umm ʿArrām57 and Umm Zawwām, Umm Shuqayrah (“Mother of a Little Blond Girl”) and Umm Ṣuqayrah (“Mother of a Little Hawk”), Umm Shawāhī (“Mother of Appetites”) and Umm Dawāhī (“Mother of Disasters”).

      ١٩،٢

2.19

      (ويُلَقَّبوا) بجِلّايه وكِرْسايه * وغاسوله * وفاره وفرفاره * وغاره وغايره * فهذه أسماء وألقاب وكُنًى وجودها كالعدم إنّما هي ألفاظ يضعوها مناسبة لذواتهم ليطابق الاسم المسمّى

      Their nicknames are “Dung Cake” and “Dung Slab,” “Potash,” “Rat” and Farfārah,58 “Raid” and “Sunken-Eye.”

      These names, nicknames, and kunyahs are utterly without value. They are nothing but words that they make up to match their persons, so that the name fits its bearer.

      ٢٠،٢

2.20

      (وبعضهم إذا نادى لزوجته يقول لها) يا داهيه يا داهيه تقول له تجيلك من الحيط كما اتّفق أنّ رجلًا منهم دخل منـزله فرأى زوجته عند الجيران فناداها يا داهيه يا داهيه فقالت له تجيك من الحيط فقال لها تعالي اتعشّي فقالت له ابنك بيخرى كلْ انت وقال شخص منهم لزوجته يا قطيعه قالت له تجيك يا ابو عنطوز

      When one of them calls to his wife, he says, “Calamity! Calamity!”59 and she replies, “She’s a-coming to you from the wall!”60 Thus it happened that a peasant entered his dwelling and found that his wife was at the neighbors’. “Calamity! Calamity!” he called to her. “She’s a-coming to you from the wall!” she answered. Then he said, “Come and have dinner!” to which she replied, “Your son’s taking a crap! Do eat!” Another said, “Drat!” to his wife, and she replied, “She’s a-coming to you, Abū ʿAnṭūz!”

      Their Children

2.21

      (وأمّا

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