I heard about my great-grandfather and great-grandmother on my mom’s side said that they were both well-known and well-spoken about among the people who lived there on the farm. I guess that is where Uncle Bennie got his green thumb. I knew this man to literally grow anything from squash to peanuts to the biggest watermelons on the farm! Uncle Bennie would work all day and then come home and spend another two hours in his garden before he came in the house for dinner. I recall Uncle Bennie killing the biggest chicken snake that I have ever seen in the house! I remember the wood floor being stained with blood for years! My first pet that I can recall was a cat that I named Roosevelt Franklin after a Sesame Street puppet.
2
Education Wasn’t Important
I am the son of parents who both had very little in education. My father had a third-grade education, and my mother had a seventh-grade education. My mom went to school at public school during the times of segregation here locally. My dad went to an old school house in the country; neither parents really stressed the importance of an education to me while growing up. As a young child, I went to public school here locally in rural Central Texas. I can remember my mother and I having the same first-grade teacher; she taught my mom, and years later she would teach me. That was the trend here in a small-town setting. The students changed, but the teacher remained the same; they would retire years later.
When I was in the second grade, I got retained. I always felt I got held back because of my difficulty learning due to being so shy. When I didn’t understand something, I wouldn’t ask questions. I still struggle with this today as an adult. The school was all on the same campus K-12 grades, everyone together. I can also remember a time when I fell asleep on the school bus. The driver didn’t know I was on the bus, and I returned to the school with the driver. I was too afraid to speak up and let the driver know I was still on the bus, just another example of not speaking up when I should have. I would never sit up front in class, and I would hope that the teacher would never call on me. By the time I was in the sixth or seventh grade, I had made the honor roll. I was a good speller, and science was my favorite subject. College was never in the picture.
Even as a young kid, I never gave college a thought. I never dreamed of having a degree in anything. I still look at my diploma that sits on my desk at work and smile big, thinking, I made it! I dropped out of school at the age of seventeen to become a dad. I wanted to be a dad that was active in the life of his kid. I have never had any regrets for that. I wanted to be the dad to my son that I never had as a kid. I had a dad who was in my life; he provided me with things that I needed, but he was absent from playing ball with me, watching me grow up, and being present for me when I needed him to be there. I quit school and began working full-time as a dishwasher at the local college campus. My plans were to return to school for my senior year, but it didn’t work out that way. I did live with regrets of not coming back to school. Somehow, I knew if I didn’t return, I would never get my high school diploma. I have a sister who has a doctorates degree, a sister with a master’s, and another has an MBA. I always felt not smart enough many times when I would be around them, like I just didn’t measure up to them. I put all I had into being the best dad that I could be, working hard at my dishwashing job. A couple of years later, I would get my first electrician job. My dad saw more in me than what I saw in me that would follow me later in life many times; others seeing in me what I never saw. My dad didn’t suggest to me; he told me to quit my job as a dishwasher at the local college campus and learn a trade. My dad told me if I learned a trade, I would always have a job. He was correct, like always the man with a third-grade education would be the smartest man I have ever known. I went to work for a local electrical contractor. I had a cousin who was already working there and had at least a year on me with experience. My father always wanted me to do well and to have more than he had, to be more successful than he was. I think that is a good trait of a good dad. I have always hope that is the kind of dad I am to my kids.
I have been in the electrical field for over thirty-five years now. My dad would be proud of me. I am so thankful that I listened to his sound advice. God knows I didn’t always listen. I would work at this electrical company for about eight years until there was a layoff. I was out of work for almost two years until I got hired at a mental health facility. I learned a lot about myself during that two-year period. It was tough on me and my family, especially financially. I would take on small electrical jobs to help make ends meet. It got my name out there in this small community that there was a young and upcoming electrician in the area. My name got out, and the work came in. I have so many customers I have done work for. Many are repeat customers who have used my services for years, and many have referred me to others. Meanwhile back at the mental health facility, I was worried about being able to handle the stress of working doing something that was new to me, being a direct care assistant.
I can recall a conversation with my cousin as we both drove there for orientation. I asked him if he thought we could do that work. It was new to us. I never forgot his response. He said to me, “We are survivors. Look where we grew at. Look at we have both endured to get to this point in life.” He was right. Again, someone else was seeing more in me than I saw in me. One of my biggest regrets in life has been that education was not taken seriously when I was younger and then even as an adult until I decided on college. I would recommend to anyone today the importance of getting an education early. Education is something that belongs to you. No one can take it from you, and you must work hard to earn it. Learn all you can and learn at an early age. I would recommend to any student no matter how young—elementary to high school—learn all you can, take your education seriously, and get the best grades you can get early in life and make it a priority to finish high school. Go to school after high school even if it’s a community college, trade school, or an online university like I did; just do it! You will thank yourself later in life. You accomplish something in life that no one can take away from you. I have become an advocate for education. The boy who dropped out of high school at seventeen is now a champion for education. I would not let anyone that I know make such a choice when it comes to getting an education; it is so vital to the success of an individual. It will make an impact on your life.
My advice to any young person today would be to put school as a top priority. Finish high school and strongly consider some college courses; it will be so vital to your success in the future. My son recently enrolled in some online college courses. I am so proud of the path he has taken in wanting to further his education. He is in his late thirties, but I am so happy that he is in school. Age has nothing to do with wanting to better yourself; age has nothing to do with wanting to make a better life for yourself. I told him that if I could do this at the age of fifty when I started my college journey, he could certainly do it at thirty-seven. My daughter is currently pursuing her master’s degree and wants to be a licensed family therapist. I am so proud of her as well. When they both were in high school, I never really did mention college to either of them. I guess the curse of me not going to school after high school continued with my own kids; generational curses are common when you come up in poverty. Dad and Mom don’t attend college, so the kids don’t either. This trend is nothing new to most families who grow up in the rural counties. This curse has to break. I stress to my grandson the importance of good grades and getting an education now more than ever before. He got to witness his fifty-four-year-old grandpa walk across the stage to receive his college degree!
To this day, this is one of my greatest accomplishments in life—hanging in there, fighting for everything that I have achieved, and nothing being handed over to me. It is the fight in me that has driven me over the years. No one can stop you if you want something bad enough. I am a strong advocate for gaining as much education that you can. It will take you places and open doors that would normally be closed. I am not opposed to learning a trade as well. Being an electrician has also been a blessing to me as well; the electrical field is awesome, so many possibilities. This is a trade that is much needed today. I realize that not all of us are going to be doctors and lawyers in this world. Learning a skill is just as vital to the workforce today. Young people can learn a lot from acquiring such skills as plumbers and electricians, heating, and air conditioning technicians.
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