I cannot name you all, but please know I appreciate all of my friendships, champions, advocates, and allies!
Dwayne Andrews, my unofficial-official attorney, thank you for jumping in and always ensuring that I do more than check the boxes when it comes to my business deals.
To The Cavu Group Council, thank you for sharing your knowledge.
Finally, Jim at Maven Press, for saying “I didn’t think about you being black.” You had something to say about a topic that needs to be discussed. Thank you!
LS
PREFACE
A Note to CEOs and Leadership
I’M NOT ONE TO MINCE WORDS or, as the saying goes, I’m not a banana-up-the-tailpipe kind of woman. Let’s put it on the table and figure it out, whatever it is. We can figure it out if we want to.
All the careers I’ve had have led me to focus on Diversity and Inclusion full time, and that’s how my company The Cavu Group was born. To be effective and to be part of the process of change, I’ve also had to bring in my mediation, pastoral care, conflict-coaching, and leadership skills to support that focus. There are a lot of feelings and nuances in implementing a successful Diversity and Inclusion effort, even if folks don’t want to admit it.
For some reason the concept of Diversity and Inclusion (D&I) is a floating cloud that everyone is trying to grab hold of. Why? Because we’re told to make it happen. Or we know that we need to do it. Or we genuinely understand how the world works.
If you’re stuck dealing with Diversity and Inclusion, or you’re not sure that you have it covered, this book is for you. It’s a simple read, and it will guide you with honest answers from over 30 people who are a mix of gender, race, religion, disabilities, and LGBTQ+. They represent, but are not limited to, tech, education, theater, writing, fashion, art, automotive, disability activism, medical, media, financial services, sales, events, promotions, construction, risk management, photography and video, lobbying, public relations, not-forprofits, social media, marketing, the faith community, entertainment, wellness, travel, personal and executive development, communications, architecture, engineering, science, service industry and the C-suite. I didn’t want to write a book from only my perspective; I wanted to share with you how people under different parts of the diversity umbrella feel and think.
Throughout the book you’ll see quotes from these participants. Please don’t assume, if you see the same title under different quotes, that they’re from the same person or that you can guess who they are.
I’ve written the book as if you and I were sitting in a café or bar, having a conversation on what’s working in your organization and what isn’t, and, most of all, how the diverse community that you’re supposed to be focusing on knows whether your commitment to Diversity and Inclusion is real or not.
Those of you who are part of that diverse community can give this book as a gift to those you feel need to know the real deal on Diversity and Inclusion though you may not be able to talk to them about it yourself. I hope I’ve done that for you.
Read this book, and continue to use it as a reference today and in the future. And let’s chat when you’ve finished.
— Leslie Short
CHAPTER 1
What’s In Your Bag?
WHEN I TRAINED TO BECOME A CERTIFIED MEDIATOR, one of the first questions the teacher asked was: “What’s in your bag?”
People in the room looked at each other, wondering: What is this teacher talking about? He then asked, “How are you going to help others find their footing if you don’t understand why you do the things you do?”
That stuck with me. There are so many people who have good intentions, and who want to be fixers, yet don’t have the interpersonal tools or self-understanding to help and not hurt.
It’s the same challenge with Diversity and Inclusion. How can you demand that Diversity and Inclusion be an initiative for your company when you haven’t thought about what you bring to the organization as a leader and how you’ll help the initiative be successful?
You’ll most likely need to read and reread and reread the paragraph below. If it’s confusing, it’s because some of you try to make Diversity and Inclusion confusing. It’s not!
Listen, if you’re looking at diversity as They & Them and inclusion as once they’re in the company they’re in, but not really We & Us, then you need to examine your culture and your thoughts about They & Them and We & Us and why you think that way.
We all have biases. Being aware of your biases, and understanding why you carry them in your bag, will allow you to work toward getting past the biases and controlling them when they pop up.
For example, we’ve all seen news stories about people who scream at others to speak English. America has an abundance of cultures and cultural offerings. So, when someone demands that someone else speak only English, you need to understand that the story is about the screamer, not the screamed-at.
When was the last time you had to step outside of your comfort zone? Are you comfortable with socializing outside of your comfort culture, outside of work? Outside of a company function? When was the last time you were where a different language was spoken, or the food was different? At a restaurant? Or out of the country?
If your vacation is where you last heard a language other than English, that doesn’t count! That’s because you knew it was for a limited time, and you could go back to your comfort culture and share how great the vacation was with your friends and make everyone listen to the new phrases you learned in a new language. But if you heard that foreign language in your office, you might tell the speaker that it’s not wise to speak in their native tongue.
But the people in your company are not They & Them, and you’re not on vacation where you can just walk away. They & Them are now We & Us in the company, and if you don’t realize that, you need to dig deeper into your bag and check for bias. Understanding cultural differences should be part of the company culture.
I get that we carry lots of stuff in our bags, especially if we live in a city and don’t drive to work. Many of us carry stuff that others can’t see, and that’s what we need to examine. Be clear that I’m not just putting this on leadership – together we must check our bags and see what’s accumulated in them from childhood, from college, from adulthood. Things get lost and things get added. Make sure that you take the time to dump everything out of your bag so that you know what you’re carrying.
When you have a better understanding of what’s important to you, how you communicate, and why you do the things you do, then you can view others in the same light you want to be viewed in.
Leadership and Diversity
Holding
