times, we all find ourselves out of our depth in life. We all have the potential to become stressed, ungenerous and fearful. Too often, we are our own worst enemy and lose sight of who we know we can be. I don’t want that to happen. I care deeply about us hacking through anything that gets in the way of us being the amazing human beings that we are. I want that for all of us, and for the world that we live in. Beyond all of the stress that you may currently feel, it is your true nature to be kind, generous and loving. You have a unique brilliance to bring to the world that we live in – even if you don’t recognize it.
So however far off that feels for you right now, I know that’s who you are. Through this book we will unpick it all together, openly and honestly.
Let the stress that you feel be a brilliant opportunity to reboot your life and to live the life you are here to lead. Stress is not our enemy; it’s a sign that something needs attention. Our error is ignoring it. Doing so leaves us needing pills for chronic conditions and aches and pains, and it gives us sleepless nights. Ignoring it ruins our relationships, our confidence and our quality of life. I hope that as you read this book you will see that you don’t have to put up with a life led by stress.
Stress is your call to action.
I will guide you through dealing with the causes and symptoms of stress so that you can get your life back. You will become more at ease at being yourself. Of course, there are times in life when things happen that do cause overwhelming stress. I hope that the tools in this book will help you to navigate your way through such times; they have certainly helped me to navigate my way through mine.
I’ve called this book Stresshacking for two reasons. The first reason is that I know that it is possible to hack through the causes of stress – to kick them into touch in a powerful and effective way. I have used all of the tips and tools in this book, both personally and with the many people I have so far helped, so I know the potential they have to change people’s lives. The second reason is a nod to my previous horse days, when a hack meant going for a nice ride in the countryside and, rather like many of the hacks in this book, I love that it implies the ease and steadiness of a hack in that way.
The focus of this book will be you.
I will help you to reorganize your inner world and your outer one. Of course, the book will cover practical day-to-day how to’s, but it will also prompt some soul-searching for you to find the peace and joy that you seek. We can’t always control what life brings, and sometimes we most definitely wouldn’t choose what it does bring. But we can choose what we bring to life. Every single thought, word, choice or action has an effect. In owning them, we become masters of our own destiny.
In Part 1 you will find some essential hacks to immediately breathe a bit of space into whatever challenges you are facing and into however you are feeling. These hacks alone will help you to find more ease. Part 2 is about taking back control over your life. It will help you to unpick how stress affects you and give you the tools to start addressing what needs to change. In Part 3 you will hack into workplace stress and find the tools to help you to deal with the pressure of heavy workloads and looming targets. Part 4 gives you the tools to start living more mindfully and to free yourself from overly ruminating on the past and the future. Parts 5 and 6 are all about you – they will help you to know yourself, to trust yourself, and most importantly to love and care for yourself. You’ll learn to ditch your own-worst-enemy-self and become your own-best-friend-self. Finally, in Part 7, through guiding you into your inner journey, you will learn how you create the outer world that you live in. If you do this inner work you will never be the same again – and neither will your life.
You will notice a theme throughout. Everything is very simple. It’s all doable – even though you are busy, even though you are tired, and even though you are stressed. You probably feel like your life needs a miracle to change it. That miracle is easier than you think. It can happen through the small, seemingly insignificant, everyday choices that you make. With one small step after another, you can shift your life into something completely different. Something better. Something more fulfilling.
Throughout this book I share strategies and tools that I have both learnt and applied, and continue to learn and apply. I do not claim to be the expert or have the answer. I invite you to take what you want and leave what you don’t. That said, without action all knowledge is wasted. Nothing will work if you don’t try it. You have to give it a chance. You have to give yourself a chance. So if you take one thing away from this book then please do something different to what you are currently doing. If you do that, your life will change.
Once a worrier, not always a worrier.
A leopard can change its spots.
You can be comfortable outside of your comfort zone.
You can become your very own best friend.
You can completely change your life.
I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by conscious endeavor.
Henry David Thoreau1
I love this quote because I have seen so many people do exactly what it describes. It is undoubtedly encouraging that it is possible for us all. Whatever your life looks like right now, know that it can change. If you’re stressed out and can’t see the wood for the trees, know that this can change.
These essential hacks are here to breathe a bit of space into your everyday life. They are so quick and simple that no matter how busy or stressed you are, you will be able to do them. In doing so, they will begin to make life more manageable.
From this moment on, every time you feel anxious, stuck, hurt, uncertain, depressed, frustrated or stressed, say to yourself these three essential words:
This can change.
Before we go any further, I want to start with a bit of encouragement.
I want you to know that you are doing the best that you can.
You always have done, whether it feels that way or not.
Whatever life is like for you right now, remind yourself of this every single day. Get up each day and make a promise to yourself simply to do the best that you can. Just that day. Exactly as it is. With whatever you face. Irrelevant of any outcome.
I don’t say that lightly or flippantly. Maybe you don’t handle the day as well as you’d like to, but you’re just going to give it your best shot anyway. Don’t waste any of your energy beating yourself up on all that you can’t do and all that you think you’re doing wrong. Just do what you can, as best you can. End of.
# The hack
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