with weeds and little foxes.
54O God! Do you have to be so beautiful?
55You Who bring the early and late rain in season,
56You Who paint bows of color across the mist
and beget the dewdrops,
57forgive my ugliness, my anger.
I am so tiresome and troublesome.
58Do not judge me, for I am an orphan.
59God knows that my deeds have been good,
but do not punish me on account of my wicked thoughts
~wrote Anatiya.
60It is an appalling and horrible thing
to be an ancient scroll,
filled with stories and secrets,
prophesies and truths,
61a tapestry of words sewn together
with golden thread,
hidden in an earthen jar sealed tightly,
and buried deep in a cave, in a sheath of rock,
where no one can find you, or touch you, or know you.
6
From the lip of my dwelling-place
I can see Jerusalem, white as snow,
gold light gleaming as a crown
on its rooftops,
curling and spilling into the streets,
2and at night, the moon
casts a spidery web over the city,
silver and deep blue,
in which lovers and falling stars
become entangled.
3Around the walls I can see men pitching tents.
They have weapons in their stocks
and they bide their time.
4As the day declines
and the shadows of evening grow long,
they gather around fires and make plans.
5Jerusalem knows what is coming,
and she waits there royally
and mightily.
6Nowhere are the shadows of evening more alluring.
Her stones are strangely tranquil.
7Long ago, when the followers of Korach offered offerings to the Lord
upon fire pans, the Lord’s fire consumed them whole.
8And yet, even in the midst of the charred corpses and wailing,
the fire pans became holy.
9This is the secret the stones of Jerusalem know:
When the fortress is destroyed
and wickedness purged,
after the burning and the bloodlust,
even in the midst of the charred remains, 10the stones
will be holy
and eternal.
11Thus says Anatiya:
Here I am hidden
in the cleft of the rock.
12O God, let Your goodness pass before me!
Let Your hand shield me from Your radiance,
let me gaze safely from behind
tendrils of vines!
13I have run like a gazelle
swiftly away from my love.
14I was afraid of being consumed like firewood
in this furnace of desire.
15It heats my chest and dries my throat.
It leaps and licks at my belly
in tiny tightened fists.
I cannot hold it in.
16I was afraid it would pour out,
hot as the mouth of the Leviathan,
that eruptive, boiling cauldron.
17Better I surrender to the cool and dank
than show my need, this monstrous thing.
18My sneezes flash lightning,
firebrands stream from my mouth,
and my breath ignites coals,
eyes glimmering red as dawn
~wrote Anatiya.
19I have acted shamefully
with nothing but greed in my heart.
20I wanted to eclipse You, God,
with my little pursed lips,
and a shrug of narrow shoulder.
21But is there not room enough in man
for the love of Heaven and the
affections of a mortal woman?
Or is the heart to small to bear it?
22O God! All is not well
with the way You have made us!
23Put me back, Majestic Creator,
Put me back into his breast!
I want my place by his heart.
24O, let Jeremiah be the first complete man
since Adam, with all of his ribs in place,
and let me be the one to complete him.
25I
