The OPA! Way. Elaine Dundon
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As we sat at our kind host’s kitchen table, we reflected on the last twenty-four hours: beginning with our dining experience at Cavo D’oro, to meeting Lambros in Thronos, to meeting the men at the kafenio, and finally . . . to sitting in the home of a fellow we had just met by the roadside, who had shared raki with us and shown us the way to the village of Monastiraki, and who was intent on making sure that we had something to eat. We couldn’t have been more grateful for these wonderful examples of authentic Greek hospitality!
Philoxenia
The word “philosophy” is derived from the Greek words “philos,” meaning love, and “sophia” meaning wisdom, so philosophy is really the love of wisdom. In similar fashion, the word “philoxenia” is derived from philos (love) and the Greek word for stranger, “xenos.” So philoxenia, as it relates to the concept of hospitality, is the love of strangers. Its roots can be traced back to the myths of the Greek god Zeus, referred to as “Zeus Xenios,” who was the king of the gods and also the god of hospitality and protector of travelers. The English words “host,” “hotel,” and “hospital,” it is interesting to note, are derived from the very same concept—that is, to take good care of strangers or guests.
There is a saying in Greece that if you are ever lost, you can just knock on someone’s door and he or she will help you. The true meaning of Greek hospitality involves making sure the guest feels protected and taken care of and, at the end of the encounter, even providing guidance to the guest’s next destination.
The Greeks we met along our journey told us that they believed all things, and thus all people, were connected and that they had a duty to ensure the health and well-being of others, especially during a crisis. “We are born to help one another,” they told us. “In your family, it is expected, you have to do it; and for strangers, especially those who are tired and need help, it is your obligation to be hospitable.”
—SOPHOCLES
Kindness
Once upon a time, a lion captured a small mouse in his large paw. Just as the lion was about to eat the mouse, the mouse exclaimed, “Stop, I may be able to do you a favor one day.” The lion thought this was amusing as he doubted how a small mouse would be able to do him a favor, but he let the mouse go. Sometime later, the lion was caught in a rope trap set by hunters. The mouse, seeing the plight the lion was in, began to gnaw the ropes and eventually freed the lion. “See,” said the mouse, “wasn’t I right?!” No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.
—Aesop’s Fables (Greece, ca 620–560 BC)
We were the recipients of many acts of kindness during our odyssey. For example, when we were in Athens at the Megaro Mousiki metro stop, unsure of which line to take to our destination, a kind woman named Lida offered to help us. Coincidentally, as our destination just happened to be the same stop as hers was, she helped us purchase our tickets from the machine, ensured we followed her to the right train, and even walked us up to the street level and pointed us in the right direction. Despite living in the big city of Athens, where everything seems to move at least twice the pace of life on the islands, Lida still embodied the traditional values of Greek hospitality.
—ISOCRATES
Just as others have helped us in the past, we must help the next person. We need to keep the kindness circulating; to pay it forward. As global villagers, we are all born with the capacity to search for ways to help others and to spread kindness in the world. Living and working with meaning involves more than just satisfying our own needs. A truly meaningful life, including a meaningful work life, requires that we look out for the interests of others in addition to our own. In this connection, if we want more humane villages within which to live, we need to be more kind. Similarly, if we want more humane workplaces within which to work, we also need to be more kind.
TRADITIONAL VILLAGE WISDOM
Being kind requires empathy, the ability to identify and find resonance with someone else’s situation or feelings. Being kind requires the awareness that we are all connected in some way. If we are willing and able to see ourselves reflected in the other person who needs help, then we can also see that we too may need help. The more aware we are of this interconnection and reflection of our shared humanity, the more kind we will be.
—MENANDER
Generosity
One day we passed a large sign on the national highway just outside the town of Agia Pelagia, but were unable to read the sign because we were driving very fast. We circled back and had to smile when we saw the sign up close. While most signs tend to communicate one or two things, this sign was advertising not two, not five, not ten, but about twenty services offered in the nearby town, such as the availability of a hotel, supermarket, barber shop, taxi service, and jeweler’s shop, along with goods like handbags, ties, vases, and fuel. We smiled because we knew that this was not just a physical sign on the highway but also a sign of Greek generosity. This sign symbolized the Greek’s approach to life: We welcome you. We want to take care of you. We have plenty to share with you. We live in abundance!
Giving generously is a virtue that leads to deeper meaning in our lives, as we gain a sense of joy and fulfillment in giving to and taking care of others. It’s the pride we take in opening our hearts and sharing what we have with others. It’s the sense of satisfaction that we feel when we spend less time protecting ourselves and more time giving to others.
Hospitality reflects the generosity of the person and is a manifestation of the human spirit. However, we all know people who do not reflect true hospitality and, instead, expect others to cater only to their needs. We all know people who feel entitled to receive things. We hear them say, “I want” or “I deserve” or “You owe me” or “The government owes me.” But as our friend Kostas advised us, it is better to always give more in value than you take.
Fortunately, there are a lot of generous people in the world who know that life is about feeling joy and sharing joy with others in the world. As we experienced in Greece, there’s always room for one more, there’s always food to share, there’s always inviting conversation to join. Generosity, in other words, means that there’s always a way to connect meaningfully with others!