had a spiritual awakening as a result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to chemically dependent persons and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 78-79
January 10
Always be a first rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else. ~Judy Garland
Each of us is an individual and there are as many ways to work the Program as there are those of us in recovery. It is one of the great gifts of our fellowship that we all suffer from the same disease, escape that disease following the same path, and yet retain our individuality with no leaders and no “laws.” Each of us can recover in the Fellowship yet retain our own uniqueness. But, we do not allow the uniqueness of our personal recovery to become so elaborate that it becomes our companion and ally, fostering the feeling that no one understands the complexity of our recovery. This wouldn’t leave room for the healing powers of a caring sponsor and a safe circle of friends. We need them in our lives so that we can find our own path in recovery—through the unique experiences that others willingly share with us.
The special people who help me be a first-rate version of myself are easy to find. They are right in front of me; my Higher Power puts them there.
But even as our diversity makes us unique, our addiction makes us all one and the same.
∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 16
January 11
Tain’t worthwhile to wear a day all out before it comes. ∼Sarah Orns Jewett
In recovery we often hear that we must clear away the wreckage of our past. A caveat to this in C.D.A. is that we are told not to clear away the wreckage of our future! Why are we told to deal with the wreckage of our past but leave the future to itself? As addicts, we tend to worry needlessly when planning events because we’re usually attempting to project the outcome as well. Projection of every possible negative result is living in the “wreckage” of that future. The “wreckage” we create in our minds is our imaginary future. The funny thing is, we can never live in that future, for it is always the present. Those who have not learned to stay in today make themselves sick over possible results that seldom come to be. When we remain in today and trust in the process, we can draw on our current strength and guidance. It is always now and always today. We barely have control over the time called “now.” So, let’s try and enjoy it!
I must be present to win.
As far back as I can remember, I always looked for a way to avoid the reality of living in the present moment. Life was scary and unpredictable, and there was nothing solid to hang on to or believe in.
∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 299
January 12
My Higher Power gives the best to me when I give my choice to Him. ∼The Pocket Sponsor
We spiritually wake up to a bright shining light, delivered from past despair and darkness. We learn, through our Eleventh Step, to reach for our Higher Power and communicate at the deepest level. This becomes our shining light. In this communication (one of sharing and listening), we are guided through another day of recovery. We know that if we give our best to spirituality, His grace, love, and tolerance is given to us. But giving our best to God does not mean “thinking” about it, mouthing the words, or simply reading this meditation. Giving our best means asking for direction and then actually taking that direction. Giving our best is not a theory, it is an action. So we ask ourselves this question, “Am I ready and willing to accept God’s illuminated path by doing the footwork? Or, am I still shining that tiny flashlight of self-will through the darkness?”
God gave me self-will and I choose
to will that back to God.
And there are those who are conscious of a powerful or subtle spiritual experience. The light is let into the dark places within, and the presence of God is felt.
∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 59
January 13
When we do the best we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life, or in the life of another. ∼Helen Keller
We want to learn to live our lives in such a way that when we die people will be sad, not relieved. As we practice the principles and do the next right thing, we may change lives in ways that we will never understand. We touch people without knowing who we have helped. And most of all, we help ourselves. Many people falter because they ask, “How do I know what my best is?” Our answer: “WWBBD. What Would Bob and Bill Do?” This is a powerful question. Bob and Bill worked the 12-step A.A. program to the best of their ability on a daily basis. If we attend meetings, use a sponsor, and read our 12-step texts, we will know what they would do. If we are confused about something thrown our way then we can use this question to determine what our spiritual answer would be: “WWBBD”
In confusing situations, I ask myself,
“What would Bill and Bob do?” Then I do it.
Faith, without works, is dead. Working the Steps to the best of my ability is a major challenge.
∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 268
January 14
If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn’t part of ourselves doesn’t disturb us. ∼Hermann Hesse
Ah, yes! How many times have we come across someone who really rubs us the wrong way? We may even want to confront that person on their irritating traits—in the name of honesty, of course. Our arrogance tells us that a few well-chosen words from us will set them straight. Hopefully, we are reminded by our sponsor that we may want to discuss it with the person in the mirror before confronting the one who is rubbing us the wrong way. Frustrating as it may seem at the time, what bugs us the most in another so often is a reflection of our own stuff. Once we examine the situation more carefully inside and out (the uncomfortableness inside us triggered by traits coming out in them), we may see our own character traits getting rubbed out.
I do not worry about rubbing out their
character defects. I learn to rub out my own.
The image in the mirror slowly shakes its head. Yes, there has been change; but surely it is not enough. Surely there could be more sincerity, greater risk-taking, deeper belief, less indulgence in character defects.
∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 59
January 15
We can feel ourselves soften when we move our attention from self-defeating thoughts into our hearts, where love lives. ∼Ruth Fishel
Sometimes it appears as if our thoughts were on the warpath, determined to attack us as if they were attempting to win some unnamed battle. Sometimes thoughts attack us when we wake in the middle of the night, unable to fall back asleep due to the war dance going on in our head. Our thoughts
