decisions you make can change your life!
My years as a student at the University of Pretoria were a wonderful and fulfilling time. My dream was to work with women – to minister to both their inner and outer beings. I had always had an interest in the beauty industry: Willa Krause Skincare is part of our family business. On completion of my studies I was approached by the popular publication, Finesse, a glossy lifestyle magazine for Christian women, to become the editor. I had the women’s ministry of my dreams, serving both the inner and the outer woman. I still write a spiritual column for the magazine, but am now more involved in our family business and minister part-time at the Kameeldrif Dutch Reformed Church. I am also involved in spiritual radio and television, a dynamic ministry that extends beyond the borders of congregation and parish. This is a privilege, and I give God the glory for it!
What would have happened had God not helped me choose?
Yes, it was my choice not to give up all hope there on the hospital bed when the car accident turned my life upside down at the age of sixteen. But I also know that I wasn’t strong enough to make that decision on my own. God was there for me; He helped me to choose life. It’s not always easy to get up after a crisis. Ask God to help you! With his help you can choose to persevere. His grace is sufficient for you!
What is God’s will for me?
As a minister I often encounter people who ask me. “What is God’s will for me in this situation; what does He want me to do or choose?” “Shall I leave my work? Shall I marry this man?” The questions around the will of God have been around for centuries, and I struggle with them a lot myself. Some people, when faced with such questions, like to pick up their Bible, let it fall open and take whatever text they find there to apply to their life. We have all been tempted to try this approach. But would you walk into a pharmacy when you’re ill, close your eyes, spin around and take whatever medicine your finger lands on when you stop? I don’t think so. What if, for example, the Bible opens at the verse about Judas hanging himself: would you take that as an instruction for yourself? It is not impossible that God might speak to someone via this method, but I think a long-term relationship with God, and an in-depth study of His word, in which He reveals His will, is a more appropriate path to follow when you are seeking His will for your life. When you ask your earthly dad for advice, you often already know what his answer will be, because of your relationship with him. When you have spent years in a relationship with God and studying His word, you actually already know what His will for you is in given situations.
And yes, we often choose wrongly, but the wonder of the almighty God we worship is that though we make wrong choices, God is still there for us and can use even our wrong choices to serve his purposes.”
I also believe that God has given us the gift of common sense, and therefore we must use it in dependence on God! Our common sense, along with our knowledge and experience of life and the counsel of spiritual advisors or mentors, are other ways in which God makes His will known to us. Naturally there will also be times when you have a deep peace about making a certain decision but it goes against your logical mind and thinking. Don’t discount the mystery of God and the peace He gives that goes beyond all understanding.
What a privilege not to have to rely on your own resources when you have to make big decisions! What a privilege to know that there is a Higher Hand that will catch you if you choose wrongly.
I conclude with a story that illustrates what a huge impact your choices have on your life. It is a story about twin brothers who grew up in desperate circumstances. Their father was an alcoholic who abused them physically and emotionally; they grew up in poverty and no opportunities came their way. One brother’s life turned out more or less the same as his father’s: one big disaster. The other brother was highly successful and prospered in almost everything he turned his hand to. When a journalist asked the first brother to what he ascribed his failure in life, he answered, “My father was an alcoholic, and I grew up in appalling circumstances. That’s why I am where I am today!” The journalist asked the second brother the same question, and his answer was astounding: “I ascribe my success to the fact that my father was an alcoholic and I grew up in appalling circumstances. I decided that I would not make the same mistakes my father made; I would rise above my circumstances and choose to live life to the full!”
This story teaches us a valuable lesson. You can choose to rise above your circumstances, to reach out to others and to take hold of life. The choice is yours! If you want your circumstances to change, you have to change first!
I can choose to try to take revenge when someone has done me wrong or I can choose to find rest in God and to forgive, thereby refusing to let bitterness destroy my life. I can choose to destroy someone with my words or I can choose to use my words and actions to bring out the good in someone and in this way let our relationship blossom. I can choose for God or against Him, and so on: the choice is yours!
2
Self will run riot
Debbie (Bingham) Nicholson
For every action there is a reaction.
Instant gratification brings temporary relief or pleasure.
Along with selfcentred choices come hard lessons and
huge consequences to bear.
I have a dedicated and supportive family, who went without for the sake of my career.
Thanks to a Phys-Ed instructor at primary school who recognised my talent in gymnastics. Thanks to my mother, who took his advice and packed up her three kids three times per week and travelled some 30 kms to a gymnastics school where she and my two younger siblings patiently waited around for two hours while I trained and then it was back in the car to whence we came.
I was a natural. When I was not at gym, I was at home practicing whenever I got a chance to do so. I loved to perform and I seemed to get an extra boost of adrenalin when I had the attention of a crowd. Within a year, I had become national champion in my age group and kept that title throughout my primary school years.
By this time, I was in the gym training five times a week, with no time for any other extramural activities; therefore I never interacted with my peers outside of the classroom, always missing out on parties, sleepovers and weekend fun. From this early age, my life was one-dimensional.
I thrived on the thrill of winning – the adrenaline, mounting the podium, the acceptance of the crowd.
At fourteen, the South African national coach spotted me and offered me a place in her training squad. What an honour! This meant leaving home and heading for Johannesburg. My coach had already sourced a foster family willing to take me in and, before I knew it, I was enrolled in a new school far away from home; a stranger in a foreign place and in a gym where I was training with SA’s best.
These were big steps for a shy, insecure, protected young girl. I managed to portray an external sense of control, yet I was empty, fearful, lonely and homesick. I wanted to be with my family. The gym was my sanctuary. When I was training my mind was fully engaged and motivated to excel. Seven days per week, for four hours a day, I could escape there.
Over the next three years I was privileged to train and be part of the Springbok team training and competing under the most fantastic coach, Nellie Snyman, who sacrificed and dedicated her life to us six girls. We trained our hearts out for her: blood, sweat and tears.
We were a very close group. Training together, competing against each other. It was challenging and hugely rewarding, with us striving for perfection and thriving on the feeling of winning,
