of the grand old hymns with an interpretation of his own, and I longed for the blood of a creature who could play the ‘Doxology’ with an amendment of minor chords which one hears only in a quartet of very young undergraduates. I believe the minister was a good man, but when he bellowed: ‘And the Lorrrd said unto Moses, the Lorrrd is a man of war; the Lorrrd is my name. My wrath shall wax hot and I will kill you with my sworrrd!’ I wondered how many centuries of purgatory it would take to atone for such a sin.
‘Who bought the property?’ I asked Thomas.
‘Nobody that I knows, sir. They do say the gent wot owns this ’ere ’Amilton flats was lookin’ at it. ’E might be a bildin’ more studios.’
I walked to the window. The young man with the unhealthy face stood by the churchyard gate, and at the mere sight of him the same overwhelming repugnance took possession of me.
‘By the way, Thomas,’ I said, ‘who is that fellow down there?’
Thomas sniffed. ‘That there worm, sir? ’E’s night-watchman of the church, sir. ’E maikes me tired-a-sittin’ out all night on them steps and lookin’ at you insultin’ like. I’d a punched ’is ’ed, sir – beg pardon, sir—’
‘Go on, Thomas.’
‘One night a comin’ ’ome with ’Arry, the other English boy, I sees ’im a sittin’ there on them steps. We ’ad Molly and Jen with us, sir, the two girls on the tray service, an’ ’e looks so insultin’ at us that I up and sez: “Wat you looking hat, you fat slug?” – beg pardon, sir, but that’s ’ow I sez, sir. Then ’e don’t say nothin’ and I sez: “Come out and I’ll punch that puddin’ ’ed.” Then I hopens the gate and goes in, but ’e don’t say nothin’, only looks insultin’ like. Then I ’its ’im one, but, ugh! ’is ’ed was that cold and mushy it ud sicken you to touch ’im.’
‘What did he do then?’ I asked, curiously.
‘’Im? Nawthin’.’
‘And you, Thomas?’
The young fellow flushed with embarrassment and smiled uneasily.
‘Mr Scott, sir, I ain’t no coward an’ I can’t make it out at all why I run. I was in the 5th Lawncers, sir, bugler at Tel-el-Kebir, an’ was shot by the wells.’
‘You don’t mean to say you ran away?’
‘Yes, sir; I run.’
‘Why?’
‘That’s just what I want to know, sir. I grabbed Molly an’ run, an’ the rest was as frightened as I.’
‘But what were they frightened at?’
Thomas refused to answer for a while, but now my curiosity was aroused about the repulsive young man below and I pressed him. Three years’ sojourn in America had not only modified Thomas’s cockney dialect but had given him the American’s fear of ridicule.
‘You won’t believe me, Mr Scott, sir?’
‘Yes, I will.’
‘You will lawf at me, sir?’
‘Nonsense!’
He hesitated. ‘Well, sir, it’s Gawd’s truth that when I ’it ’im ’e grabbed me wrists, sir, and when I twisted ’is soft, mushy fist one of ’is fingers come off in me ’and.’
The utter loathing and horror of Thomas’s face must have been reflected in my own for he added:
‘It’s orful, an’ now when I see ’im I just go away. ’E makes me hill.’
When Thomas had gone I went to the window. The man stood beside the church-railing with both hands on the gate, but I hastily retreated to my easel again, sickened and horrified, for I saw that the middle finger of his right hand was missing.
At nine o’clock Tessie appeared and vanished behind the screen with a merry ‘Good morning, Mr Scott’. When she had reappeared and taken her pose upon the model-stand I started a new canvas much to her delight. She remained silent as long as I was on the drawing, but as soon as the scrape of the charcoal ceased and I took up my fixative she began to chatter.
‘Oh, I had such a lovely time last night. We went to Tony Pastor’s.’
‘Who are “we”?’ I demanded.
‘Oh, Maggie, you know, Mr Whyte’s model, and Pinkie McCormack – we call her Pinkie because she’s got that beautiful red hair you artists like so much – and Lizzie Burke.’
I sent a shower of spray from the fixative over the canvas, and said: ‘Well, go on.’
‘We saw Kelly and Baby Barnes the skirt-dancer and – and all the rest. I made a mash.’
‘Then you have gone back on me, Tessie?’
She laughed and shook her head.
‘He’s Lizzie Burke’s brother, Ed. He’s a perfect gen’l’man.’
I felt constrained to give her some parental advice concerning mashing, which she took with a bright smile.
‘Oh, I can take care of a strange mash,’ she said, examining her chewing gum, ‘but Ed is different. Lizzie is my best friend.’
Then she related how Ed had come back from the stocking mill in Lowell, Massachusetts, to find her and Lizzie grown up – and what an accomplished young man he was – and how he thought nothing of squandering half a dollar for ice-cream and oysters to celebrate his entry as clerk into the woollen department of Macy’s. Before she finished I began to paint, and she resumed the pose, smiling and chattering like a sparrow. By noon I had the study fairly well rubbed in and Tessie came to look at it.
‘That’s better,’ she said.
I thought so too, and ate my lunch with a satisfied feeling that all was going well. Tessie spread her lunch on a drawing table opposite me and we drank our claret from the same bottle and lighted our cigarettes from the same match. I was very much attached to Tessie. I had watched her shoot up into a slender but exquisitely formed woman from a frail, awkward child. She had posed for me during the last three years, and among all my models she was my favorite. It would have troubled me very much indeed had she become ‘tough’ or ‘fly’, as the phrase goes, but I never noticed any deterioration of her manner, and felt at heart that she was all right. She and I never discussed morals at all, and I had no intention of doing so, partly because I had none myself, and partly because I knew she would do what she liked in spite of me. Still I did hope she would steer clear of complications, because I wished her well, and then also I had a selfish desire to retain the best model I had. I knew that mashing, as she termed it, had no significance with girls like Tessie, and that such things in America did not resemble in the least the same things in Paris. Yet having lived with my eyes open, I also knew that somebody would take Tessie away some day, in one manner or another, and though I professed to myself that marriage was nonsense, I sincerely hoped that, in this case, there would be a priest at the end of the vista. I am a Catholic. When I listen to high mass, when I sign myself, I feel that everything, including myself,
