“Y’all come in.” Alexis turned and opened the door wider.
Ryan’s large warm hand rested on Lucy’s back, a reassuring reminder that he was there for her. He had her back figuratively and literally.
“Your sister has a nice drawl but it isn’t as sweet as yours,” he whispered into her ear before closing the door behind them. As they entered the living area, a smiling Sam was carrying little Emily to meet them. Lucy froze. Ryan almost stumbled into her. Gracefully, he recovered and stood beside her. His hand brushed up then down her back, letting her know that he was aware of her response.
“Lucy, we’re so glad to see you. We thought if you were too busy to come see us we’d just come see you.”
“Hi, uh...Sam.” She faltered with his name, her attention so completely focused on Emily.
“I’m Ryan O’Doherty.”
She barely registered Ryan speaking. The two men shook hands.
Only because she’d lost the warmth of Ryan’s hand did her gaze break away from the baby. She had grown so much and become more beautiful since she’d seen her.
Sam pulled her into a one-armed hug and she returned it quickly. She never wanted to see that unsure look on Alexis’s face again.
Alexis’s attention turned to Ryan. “So, are you the doctor who keeps Lucy so busy that she doesn’t have time to call us?” She moved to stand beside Sam.
Ryan glanced at Lucy and winked. “We’ve been busy.” His look suggested something different than hospital business.
Lucy couldn’t help but give him a small smile. His wink always made her feel as if she belonged. He was trying so hard to ease her out of her worries but the intense jealousy stuck like chewed gum. Her attention turned back to the little cherub in Sam’s arms. She itched to reach for Emily and pull her close to inhale her baby fresh smell. But she couldn’t. It would be too hard to let her go. She stepped away to put some space between her and the child.
“This is Emily,” Sam proudly said to Ryan. “Our baby girl.”
For the first time the deep searing pain she normally felt when Sam made that statement wasn’t as strong. Thankfully the ache was easing. Becoming what it should be. Although everything in her still begged to reach out and take Emily, but she dared not do it.
“Come on in and have a seat.” Alexis directed them to the living area. Two sofas faced each other with a low table between them. “Let me take your coats. We thought we’d just have dinner catered in. It would be so much easier than going out with Emily. That way we can really talk.” She placed the coats over a chair near the door.
“That sounds nice.” Lucy forced out the polite comment as she took a seat on the sofa.
How had she let her feelings get so out of control that she had to make an effort to have a conversation with her sister? She didn’t like it but didn’t know what to do about it. It was as if she and Alexis were old friends trying to find common ground again.
They’d been everything to each other before Emily had come along. Alexis marrying Sam had changed things between them but that had been nothing compared to how they’d been after Emily had arrived. They’d once shared everything but now Lucy hid a crippling ugly secret.
Ryan sat beside her, not too close but near enough that his leg lightly touched her knee. The small contact fortified her.
“Before I settle down for a talk, I need to get Emily a bottle. Hope you like Italian, Ryan. It’s Lucy’s favorite.”
“I shouldn’t be surprised. She lives above an Italian restaurant.”
Alexis looked at Lucy. “Really? I didn’t know that.”
“Yeah, I haven’t had a chance to tell you,” Lucy said.
“Well, you’ll have to tell me all about it over dinner. It should be here soon,” Alexis said, before going into the other room.
The doorbell rang. “That’ll be our food,” Sam said. “Hey, Lucy, would you hold Emily while I get that?” He handed the child to her without waiting for a reply.
Could she touch Emily and not break down? She cradled the soft, cuddly baby to her chest with trembling arms.
Sam left them.
She nuzzled Emily’s neck, pulling her close.
“She’s a cutie,” Ryan said. “You’re an exceptional person Lucy Edwards.”
Her heart lightened. He thought she was special. She hadn’t realized how much she’d needed to hear that. Ryan being the one who believed she was incredible made it twice as nice.
Ryan offered his finger to Emily and she clutched it with a chubby hand.
Lucy glanced at Ryan. He watched her intently with a mixture of concern and amazement on his handsome face. Was he judging her reactions?
“How’re you doing?” he asked quietly.
“I’m making it.” She turned to Emily so that she could see the child’s face. Alexis’s features were showcased there, not her own. Something shifted inside her, allowing her heart to let go. She no longer felt like a spurned mother but an aunt. Still, her envy for what Alexis had still festered. She wanted her own child, a husband, family. To belong. To never be pushed out again.
“I’m proud of you.” Ryan gave her a quick kiss on the temple.
Alexis returned. “I see that Emily’s enjoying getting to know her auntie again. Hasn’t she grown?”
She gave them all a bright smile and took Emily from Lucy, who let the baby go with less reluctance than she’d expected. Mercifully, Alexis was so caught up in Emily that she didn’t notice how uncomfortable Lucy was. At least she’d been able to cover it well. Without Ryan’s reassuring presence, she would have broken down and spilled her horrible secret.
“She has grown. Is she a good baby?” Lucy managed to ask, clasping her hands together.
“The best.” Alexis sat, adjusted Emily and put a bottle in her mouth.
When Ryan’s large hand covered hers, Lucy held on tight.
* * *
Ryan was impressed with how well Lucy was handling what he’d come to realize was an extremely difficult situation for her. She was making all the right noises and had even held Emily without breaking into pieces. He was proud of her. She was trying, but the strain showed in the tension around her lips and her rigid posture.
He’d been emotionally empty after his father had died and had kept it together only because his sisters had needed him. He never thought he’d willingly be anyone’s emotional crutch again. Then along had come Lucy with her big blue eyes and quiet ways, and here he was doing everything in his power to support her, encourage her.
She could’ve done it without him. He’d seen her spunk and determination when she’d told him off. It had made him feel like he was important
