shouldn’t let his opinion matter to me. But it did.
‘I guess the real question, though,’ he went on, studying me, ‘Is why would you think that?’
I let out a breath and glanced away from him. ‘I wasn’t fishing or—’
‘I know you’re not. But seriously, Thea. Why the hell would you think you’re ordinary?’
Telling him the truth would make me feel vulnerable, but I couldn’t think of a decent excuse. And, besides, I’d already told him most of it.
‘I don’t really,’ I muttered. ‘It’s just... Mr Chen didn’t think I was good enough for him. Or at least not good enough to adopt me. I know he said it was because I wasn’t his blood but...’ I stopped, my throat tightening, and then a whole lot of words I hadn’t meant to say came tumbling out. ‘My parents just left me on the stairs of the orphanage. They didn’t even leave a note. And sometimes I wonder why they didn’t name me or leave any sign that they cared about me. And sometimes I think it was because there was nothing about me that made them care.’
A silence fell.
Oh, God, why had I said all that? It sounded so pathetic and needy—attention-seeking, even—all things that Mr Chen had told me I needed to overcome if I wanted to make a success of this job.
So much for overcoming...
I forced my mouth shut, focusing on the bright inks of the dragon on Damian’s chest instead, given it was better than looking into his face.
Then a finger was beneath my chin, he was tilting my head back with irresistible strength and I met his gaze, dreading what I was going to see there.
But there was none of Mr Chen’s cold disapproval, only an oddly fierce expression that I didn’t understand. ‘You are not ordinary, Thea,’ he said quietly, forcefully. ‘I don’t know why your parents gave you up, but it wasn’t about you, I’d stake my entire fucking corporation on it. You are rare and precious. Priceless, even.’ Conviction burned in his eyes, his thumb moving caressingly over my bottom lip. ‘That’s why I’m asking you to go to London with me. Because I’m not ready for you to disappear on me. I want more of you, understand?’
There was a hot feeling inside me, an ache that I didn’t want to examine too closely, afraid of what it might mean. So I didn’t examine it. I looked at him instead, seeing the belief in his gaze.
He thought I was rare and precious. He thought I was priceless.
Careful. You have to be so careful, Thea.
Oh, yes, I did. Mr Chen had been very clear: no husband or children. No friends, as they couldn’t know anything that could compromise client discretion. He’d told me that it was easier to have no one, to get used to being alone, because that had worked for him. So I had got used to it, telling myself that it was easy not to want anything if you tried hard enough.
Except now I’d taken a step over that line and allowed myself to want something: more of Damian Blackwood.
It’s going to blow up in your face; you know that, right?
Maybe it would. But right now I didn’t much care.
I didn’t know what to say—anything was going to sound way too emotional and I had the sense he didn’t want that. So I settled for nipping playfully on his thumb instead.
He smiled and took his hand away, leaning forward and kissing me, long and slow. ‘Leave everything to me. I’ll arrange it.’
Damian was as good as his word.
Over the next few days, he dealt with everything, including the issue of a passport, because I didn’t have one—I’d never needed one before now. I didn’t know how he managed to get it through so fast—connections, in all likelihood—but a passport was soon produced, and the problematic issue of clothing was resolved.
I was all set to go home and grab some things, but Damian wouldn’t hear of it, handling the ordering of some clothes for me himself. Which was fine. I was more than happy to let him order and pay for things for me. After all, what was the point of a having billionaire lover if he didn’t buy you stuff? I wasn’t all that interested in clothes anyway, but it sure was nice to be taken care of.
However, when the small mountain of clothing arrived by delivery that afternoon and it was all in my size, and all fitting perfectly, I could suddenly see why he’d called himself the glue that held his corporation together.
He remembered everything, from fluctuating stock prices and employee wages, to the names of everyone in his massive company. He could recall spreadsheets and reports, money going in and out, as well as what was happening in all the different markets and industries in which his company was involved.
He was a walking, talking database and it also soon became clear why he was on the phone all the time; people were constantly calling him to request information, ask his opinion or to solve problems. And he dealt with it all with a combination of easy charm and firmness that I found insanely attractive as well as a little scary.
Because his formidable memory, combined with the razor-sharp intelligence that went along with it, was incredibly intimidating. And when the fierce intensity of his will shone through at the same time... Well, he was a force of nature. But he kept that well hidden behind the charm he cultivated. Behind the mask of that smile.
Personally, I found his intensity incredibly exciting, especially at night, in bed.
He always remembered what I liked and how I liked it and he’d watch me intently, using my reactions as cues either to push my boundaries or pull back if it got too much. It was amazing having all that attention focused on me.
It was also like a rollercoaster you couldn’t get off, careening around corners and looping the loop, going too fast for control and wondering if you were going to crash and burn, yet loving the wind in your hair anyway.
I could get off that rollercoaster, though, and I knew it. I could tell him that I didn’t want to go anywhere and slip away back to Mongkok and my existence in the shadows.
It wouldn’t take much to leave.
But I didn’t want to. The part of me that ached for the sun wanted to keep basking in it while it lasted. And if leaving ended up being harder than I thought it would be, then what of it?
I’d survived everything else life had thrown at me—what was a little more pain?
Damian
WE TOUCHED DOWN in London a few days later and, although I’d done my best to hide my growing tension, I knew Thea had picked up on it.
She kept throwing me concerned looks as we disembarked from the corporate jet, apparently not bothered by the grey and gloomy day London had produced to welcome us.
Perhaps asking her to come with me hadn’t been the best decision. Maybe I should have asked someone else, someone less interested in me and less perceptive. Someone
