Although connected by past generations of marriages and purchase and kinship to the ancient Highland mormaers of Moireabh and of Atholl, the lowland branch of the family that Ciara was marrying into was distant in location, wealth and power. Connor believed this match would be good for the clan MacLerie in order to gain access to the important ports of Perth and Dundee, so that was all that truly mattered.
With the weather co-operating, they should reach their destination by mid-day. Ciara and Elizabeth’s excitement as they travelled through the city forced a smile from him more times than he would like to admit. They would be able to visit here often once Ciara married the Murray heir.
At least it would be easier than seeing her day in and out in Lairig Dubh. Calling on his honour and hers, seeing the dark abyss of possibilities opening before them and then stepping back from that edge had a sobering effect for him. It made it easier to let her go.
He would have to remind himself of that every day and night from now on. For now, he would see her safely on. He’d sent young Dougal ahead to the Murrays to tell of their arrival. Once they stopped for food on the other side of Perth, it would be a direct ride from there.
‘You seem caught in your thoughts, Tavis,’ she said now, riding next to him. ‘Is all well?’
Startled by her nearness, he shook his head. ‘All is well.’
‘Have you been here before?’ she asked, never taking her eyes from the street or the people making their way along it.
‘Once, many years ago with your father.’ They skirted a group of people examining the wares in the stalls here in the wool district. ‘We were heading to Edinburgh and to meet with the king’s ministers about a trade agreement. We passed through here and on to Dundee and then by ship down to Edinburgh. You will like being closer to the sea, Ciara.’
Where the hell had that come from? Good Christ! Would these bits of things remembered about her never cease? She’d always liked the water. Boats.
‘James said his home is north of the Tay, before it widens to the sea.’
‘Your father travels to Edinburgh several times a year. It would not be difficult or far for him to visit you here,’ he offered.
‘He is not my father, Tavis.’
The words made him tense his body and his horse shifted in reaction, pushing them closer to Ciara. She was able to keep hers under control and guided them a pace aside to avoid bumping.
‘He raised you as his own, Duncan did.’ Safe words since it was commonly known that she was his wife’s child.
‘If I lasted five years with the Robertsons and just more than ten years with the MacLeries, do you think the Murrays will keep me longer?’
His breath caught at her disclosure and at the sense of hurt and abandonment behind them. Lord Iain’s words about her knowledge of her father came back to him and he now saw her curiosity and her accomplishments in a different way.
She was not the confident young woman who had come to him in the night to propose a marriage to him. She was instead an insecure girl who did her best in the hopes of making herself indispensable to her stepfather so that he would keep her.
What could he say? What words could he use to explain her true worth without then claiming her for himself? Lucky for him, they reached the bridge they needed to cross to leave Perth and he was called away to pay the toll and see to their wagon. By the time they had crossed the bridge and left Perth, Ciara was riding alongside the wagon, chatting with Elizabeth.
Soon, his men returned and they’d brought several others with them.
James Murray was with them.
Tavis hailed them as they approached and stopped his horse to greet the young lord. Instead, James rode past him and stopped before Ciara. Jumping from his horse, he took Ciara’s hand and kissed it. And he did not let go while he spoke in hushed tones to only her.
Oh, aye, the Murrays would keep her longer than the MacLeries had, damn them both!
Ciara smiled at James, enjoying the very gallant way he kissed her hand and greeted Elizabeth and Cora, welcoming them to his home. After sharing her weakness with Tavis, she felt vulnerable and exposed. She’d never spoken of such things to anyone, not her mother, not her closest friend. She’d barely admitted them to herself in the darkest hours when self-doubt ruled her thoughts. But this journey was an emotional one as much as it was a business one and her heart ached from all of the truths and changes she faced so far along the way.
‘Are you tired from riding, Ciara?’ James asked as he mounted once more. His horse was magnificent and her hands itched to take the reins of one like that.
‘Nay, my lord,’ she replied honestly. ‘The roads have been smooth and the skies clear this day.’
He laughed aloud and nodded. Motioning forwards with his head, he asked, ‘Would you like to ride ahead with me? It is just a few miles now and my parents await your arrival.’
Ciara turned to look at Tavis, but Cora clucked her tongue before she could.
‘That would be a wonderful idea, lass. Go on with the young lord, then, and we will be behind ye.’
‘Come then, Ciara,’ James said, turning his horse towards the road and nodding. ‘You,’ he said to Tavis, ‘you are in charge?’
‘Aye, Lord Murray,’ Tavis replied, his tone even though she heard something there.
‘See the women and the wagon safely to the keep. At the fork in the road ahead, take the left and go through the village.’
Ciara startled then. She’d never heard Tavis spoken to as though a servant. He sat high in the MacLerie laird’s esteem and trust, but to James and others he was simply a servant to order here and there. These lowlanders did not keep to the same practices and sense of family that the clans in the Highlands did.
James smiled at her and she followed him along the road. Though she could have given his horse a good challenge with hers, she paced herself to remain just a bit behind him.
They took the left path at the split and found the village James mentioned to Tavis. James slowed his horse down as they made their way through the narrow street and then spurred it faster once past the cottages, going uphill to the stone keep ahead. Ciara kept her attention on James as the path became steeper, though not truly difficult. It would take some time for the wagon to climb this hill and reach the keep.
The Murrays lived in a stone manor house, built atop the hill and surrounded by a wall. Not knowing what she expected, the unrelenting dark grey was not it. No hint of welcome. It looked like countless other houses they’d passed, not grand enough to be called castles or true keeps, but walled against intrusion. She wanted to dislike it immediately.
James guided her through the gate and into the small yard in the front. Lord and Lady Murray stood before an open door and waved to her. Ciara waved back and brought her horse to a halt a few yards away. A servant came running to take hold of her horse and James was there at her side to help her down.
Best behaviour. Best behaviour. Best behaviour.
She chanted the words inside her head
