when you first showed up at the training center and all the coaches weren’t sure how to take you guys,” she said. “You snowboarders were a group of really young athletes and coaches. No one really knew what you’d be doing.” She paused. “But you’ve been a vital member of the winter sport family and have even brought some new events like ski moguls into the sport.”
“It has been a long, hard fight,” he agreed, “trying to get some respect.”
“Why’d you do it?” she asked curiously.
“I like recognition as much as the next guy. My dad was impressed when I got my gold medal,” he said. “Plus, I liked being part of the team that represented our country.”
“Me, too. Most of the time I don’t think about being from the US, but when we walked into the opening games and the anthem played, I really felt it. I wanted to win not just for me but for everyone back home.”
He smiled at her. In that moment she realized there was a lot more to Carter Shaw than he wanted the world to see. He seemed like this tough badass, but in truth he was a softie just like her.
Their tour guide gathered them together for the hike back to the hotel. This time Lindsey didn’t seem as distant from Carter as she had been on the way down. She reached for his hand and held it in hers as they walked back.
After they’d changed and she headed out to meet him in the lobby, she noticed he was talking to a group of people but stopped when he saw her.
He waved goodbye to the group and walked over to her. He made her feel special. As though, despite her flaws and scars, she was enough for him.
* * *
IN THE WEEKS that followed their diving at the crater, Lindsey felt they’d fallen into a safe routine. She got up each morning and took a run down the bunny slope. Each time she felt paralyzed with fear at the top, but when she got to the bottom she felt exhilarated. She often met her friend Elizabeth for breakfast and then worked her shift at the school.
Carter was always in one of her classes. She wouldn’t admit it to anyone, but she was starting to really care for him, and that worried her. This new life where she could only ski the easiest slope and where Carter was part of her joy was odd, but she liked it.
It was time for her last class of the day, and she skied out to meet the kids, a little disappointed when Carter wasn’t there. Though he hadn’t said he’d be at the class, this would be the first day he’d missed. These kids had been taking lessons for a while, and most them already had the skills they needed to ski. They were ready for something more advanced, as was she. She felt nervous, but made the decision after checking with their parents to take them to the ski lift for a moderate run.
This would be her first chance to try out something other than the bunny slope. She was nervous, of course, but having the kids along made her focus on them and not herself.
“This kind of thing must seem pretty tame to you,” Courtney said as they got off the ski lift and readied to take their run down the mountain.
“Not at all. I love skiing, and when I’m on the snow I’m just happy to be there,” she said. The words were press friendly and sound-bite worthy, but she realized that she meant them. This was what she’d needed.
And she didn’t need Carter Shaw to do it. Not that she ever had, but she realized she’d sort of been leaning on him as a crutch.
Dan, one of the other instructors, had come along for the run and taken the first group of kids down the slope. The ski patrol was nearby and always on alert, so she wasn’t worried. These kids were good skiers. She was more concerned her nerves might snap, but her fear of embarrassment was greater than her fear of a fall, and as she led the last group down the mountain, she felt a little of her old confidence returning.
She hadn’t realized how much she’d missed it until this very moment. And when she got to the bottom, she knew that something significant had changed inside her. Everything was telling her to go to the top and take a run.
Lindsey released a sigh. She was a little freaked out that she hadn’t heard from Carter all day. And there had been no answer to the texts she’d sent earlier. She wanted to take her run, but now she was worried about Carter.
This just wasn’t like him.
Something had to be seriously wrong for him not to show up or to return her texts.
She stowed her skies and signed out at work. Changing out of her ski gear into a pair of faded jeans, a thick sweater and her Ugg boots, she decided to swing by his place to check on him.
But as she walked into the lodge and up the patio, she noticed a large group around the pools and hot tubs. Looked like a camera crew, even. They were probably filming a new commercial for the resort, but as she looked closer she recognized a couple of Thunderbolt women from the shindig at the bar a while back.
She started for the group, thinking maybe they knew where Carter was, when she saw him. Sitting in the middle of the hot steaming water with his arms around two bikini-wearing hotties. Her heart sank. She’d heard that expression before, but this was the first time she’d actually experienced it.
She felt light-headed, as though she wasn’t all there, and then she felt her face turning red. This was so embarrassing. She’d been worried about him. She’d given up skiing to come find him because she’d thought that surely something must really be wrong.
And he was sitting in a hot tub with a bunch of women!
His laughter rang out over the pool area, and she clenched her fingers together. She felt stupid. As though she should have known this would happen. As though the relationship she’d thought they were building was just a thought on her side.
She almost went to confront him, but then Georgina caught her eye, and the look of sympathy on her face made Lindsey feel so small she just turned and walked away.
She didn’t want to think about Carter Shaw. She got as far as the lobby where Elizabeth was talking to one of the front-desk staff. Her friend waved, but something on Lindsey’s face must have showed her inner turmoil because Elizabeth rushed over.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m great,” she said through clenched teeth.
“Uh, let’s go get a drink and talk.” Elizabeth wrapped her arm around Lindsey and led her to the bar.
Lindsey could only nod. She needed someone to talk to, and hadn’t realized how much until this moment. She was used to keeping everything inside. Had made her reputation in skiing by being the Ice Queen... Maybe it was those months when she’d been here working and not practicing, but suddenly it felt as if she had no control over her emotions anymore.
She didn’t like it, but she couldn’t change it.
“What’s up?” Elizabeth said once they had secured two empty seats in a corner of the cocktail lounge. “You look like... Well, if it was anyone else I’d say you look pissed off.”
Lindsey nodded tersely. “I am.”
“At who?”
“Carter Shaw.”
* * *
CARTER
