ladies’ man of the family.
Jason caught Lawrence giving Joel a why-did-you-bring-that-up look.
“She’s here,” was all Jason could say in response.
“Well, it was a long time ago, Jason. You need to just let it go. You guys were young. You’ve moved on. She’s moved on. It was the past. Don’t be all sulky about it fifteen years later. And for Pete’s sake, don’t cause any drama at the wake.” Joel was only a couple of years older than Jason. But Jason swore when it came to getting in his business and trying to boss him around, Joel had the older brothers beat.
“Joel is right, Jason. This isn’t the time. And besides, women are scandalous, anyway. We all know this. Don’t let her deceit get to you.” Patrick, still bitter over his divorce and his cheating ex-wife, wouldn’t give any woman the benefit of the doubt.
Catching his woman in bed with another man must have been hard on Patrick. Even five years later, he still hadn’t really gotten past it.
Jason could sympathize with his older brother in more ways than he had ever let any of them know. He had never told his family the full story of his breakup with Penny.
He took a deep breath. After years of distance, he suspected that the things he’d been made to believe back then might be false. He was determined to find out, one way or another, once and for all.
“I agree. Shake it off, baby bro. Be the bigger person. Let it go.” Lawrence slanted his left eye when he spoke, as if it would help make his point more clearly. Lawrence was suspicious of just about everyone, and it probably had a lot to do with the things he had seen working in the narcotics division of the police force. But he was a stand-up guy who always tried to do the right thing. The only problem was, he always encouraged others to do the same.
Since Jason didn’t want to have this conversation with his brothers, especially not on the front steps of the funeral home, he just nodded.
His brothers accepted his nod as confirmation that he’d let it go. But Jason wasn’t certain he really could. Watching as they entered the funeral home, Jason let the pep talk his brothers had given him stew for a moment. Yes, he could be the bigger person and not confront Penny, but he needed to know a few things. He still had some burning questions. Pieces of the puzzle didn’t fit.
Since solving old crimes and mysteries had become his job, he looked forward to having the chance to apply his cold-case detective skills to this very personal area of his life.
He would have to work on his approach if he was going to solve this case. He hadn’t meant to approach her with such an attitude. But there had been something about seeing her again. And when Terrill showed up…well, that had been the last straw.
“This is a tough time for Penny, you know. Big Mama was the only person who was always there for her, no matter what. She’s taking it hard, so you really need to lay off about the past.”
Terrill! Speak of the devil.
Jason turned to see his former best friend, and it was all he could do to contain himself. He had already made the mistake of showing them he still felt hurt by their betrayal, and he didn’t want to let them see any more of his vulnerability.
“Shouldn’t you be inside with her, then, if she’s so torn up? Isn’t that what lovers are supposed to do for one another? Comfort? Console? Why are you out here talking to me?”
“I’m out here because, despite what you think, I want what’s best for everyone involved. She doesn’t need the stress. It’s bad enough she has to deal with Carla, and you know how that can be.” Terrill ran his hand through his close-cropped, naturally curly hair and sighed. “You don’t need to be all hung up on a past you barely understand. There’s a lot you just don’t know, Jason. If I could tell you without breaking confidences, I would.”
Jason watched kids ride their bikes down the crowded street, took in all the hustle and bustle of the inner city on a spring evening. Paterson’s streets came alive, pulsing with energy, once the days became warmer and longer. There might not be a lot of flowers in bloom or trees blossoming in the tenement jungle, but spring was definitely in the air. While feeling the pulse of his beloved city, Jason counted to ten.
It didn’t work.
The fact was, Terrill was the same pretty boy who’d gone off to Los Angeles with his girl. He was the same former record company intern who had made it possible for Jason’s girl to dance in rap videos, thereby torturing Jason for years, because he could still see her everywhere but she was no longer his.
If anyone in the world knew how much Jason had loved Penny, it was Terrill. For those reasons alone, Terrill’s betrayal was unforgivable.
“Oh! Now, you have morals. Where were they fifteen years ago, when you stole my girl?”
Terrill threw his hands up and shook his head. “I give up, man. I tried, but you’re stuck in the past. You need to let it go. And like I said, lay off with the guilt trips on Penny. She doesn’t need that right now.”
Watching Terrill walk away, Jason was almost tempted to chase him and finish the fight. It was a fight fifteen years in the making, and he was sure they would have it eventually.
Maybe the wake wasn’t the time and place. But he would get answers—especially from the woman who’d broken his heart.
Penny let out the breath she hadn’t been aware she was holding when she saw Jason leave the funeral home. And she smiled when she saw the other Hightower brothers coming in to pay their respects. Patrick, Lawrence and Joel had always been like unofficial big brothers to her. She missed the closeness she used to have with their family.
If only things could have been different….
“Penny, baby, it’s so good to see you. You look good. I’m just so sad I’m seeing you under these circumstances. How’re you holding up, baby?” Jason’s mother, Celia Hightower, gave her a big hug, followed by her husband, James Hightower.
Seeing the other two adults who had provided her with a place of refuge when she was a kid, while her only other constant source of support lay in a coffin, made her chest swell up. But she refused to break down and start crying. If she started, she feared, she’d never stop.
She stood in front of Big Mama’s casket, and the only thing she could think was how someone who was so much larger than life, someone who had been life to her, could possibly be gone.
The makeup the mortician had put on Big Mama seemed a few shades too dark for the light-complexioned woman Penny had known. Penny touched the long, wavy hair that Big Mama and her own mother shared but had skipped a generation with her.
She remembered it had been Big Mama who taught her to be proud of her thick, sandy-brown hair when she wanted soft, jet-black hair like Big Mama and Carla’s. When Carla complained that Penny’s hair was just too much to handle, Big Mama had taught Penny how to love and tame her mane.
Penny let the good memories wash over her and fought back her tears as she touched Big Mama’s cheek.
Mr. Hightower kept his strong arm around her. “She’s in a better place now. She’s with the Lord.”
Why do people always say that? How do they really know? Penny wondered as she continued to caress Big
