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Therapist's Overview ASSERTIVE COMMUNICATION OF ANGER
GOALS OF THE EXERCISE
1 Verbalize feelings of anger in a controlled, assertive way.
2 Decrease overall intensity and frequency of angry feelings, and increase ability to recognize and appropriately express angry feelings as they occur.
3 Demonstrate respect for others and their feelings.
ADDITIONAL PROBLEMS FOR WHICH THIS EXERCISE MAY BE MOST USEFUL
Antisocial Behavior
Bipolar Disorder—Mania
Family Conflict
Impulse Control Disorder
SUGGESTIONS FOR PROCESSING THIS EXERCISE WITH THE CLIENT
The purpose of this exercise is to improve the client's ability to verbally express anger in an assertive manner. Teach the client effective communication skills and/or coping strategies in the therapy sessions to help the expression of feelings of anger in a direct, calm, controlled, yet nonaggressive manner. The client is encouraged to practice the assertive communication techniques on a regular basis at home, at school, and in the workplace. The first page of the assignment identifies several effective communication skills. Feel free to teach the client other effective communication skills that will help the client to express anger appropriately.
EXERCISE 1.C ASSERTIVE COMMUNICATION OF ANGER
In this assignment, you are asked to practice expressing your anger in a calm, controlled, and assertive manner on a regular basis at home, at school, or in the workplace. Assertive communication of anger includes the following characteristics:
1 Use of “I” statements—“I” statements reflect ownership of thoughts and feelings. Effective “I” statements are present‐focused and free of manipulative ploys. Use of “I” statements are more likely to reflect statements of personal responsibility.
2 Avoid use of “You” statements that are often blaming, accusatory, or judgmental in nature. “You” statements often focus on the other person's faults and place them on the defensive.
3 Calmly state your reasons for your anger. Refer to specific behaviors and focus more on the present situation and not on past faults of the other person.
4 Use facts instead of judgments.
5 Make requests for positive and specific changes in behavior. For example, “I would appreciate it if you would call and let me know when you are running late.”
6 Express your anger as soon after the specific behavior or event as possible so that your expression of anger can be present oriented.
7 Express anger in a calm and reasonable tone of voice. Clearly, it is best to avoid yelling or talking to the other person in a high‐pitched or accusing tone of voice. Avoid nagging and whining as well.
8 Use active listening skills. After you have expressed your thoughts and feelings in a calm and controlled manner, it is important to listen to the other person's point of view. Remember to listen to other people's thoughts without interrupting. Maintain good eye contact while they are speaking to let them know that you are listening intently to their thoughts and feelings. Try to avoid thinking about what you want to say next.
9 If the discussion becomes tense or heated, remember to take a break to regain your composure and organize your thoughts.
Now that you have been
