Work. Mama. Life.. Ali Young
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Like I said at the start of the book, it's all about you: taking what you want and choosing your own adventure. My hope is that by the end of part III you will have found even just one new way to choose your outcomes, create connection back in your day and love yourself endlessly as a mum.
Throughout the book you will find glorious interludes. I've called them ‘Pause moments’. These give you a moment to reflect and think about what you've just read. Maybe it's big for you, maybe it's a blip or maybe it's not significant at all. There is no right or wrong on this spectacular journey.
Motherhood is amazing. Working motherhood can really give us the best of both worlds. We can fill our cup for ourselves and our cup for our families, making this intentional shift with beautiful intentions, knowledge, tools and skills to make it thriving, vital and joyful!
It makes me jump whenever I read that: a world full of mums expressing their own awesome selves is my kind of nirvana. Let's get into it!
Part I WORK (AND YOU)
Balancing Motherhood and Life
Let's explore the world of motherhood!
As I said in the introduction, this part of the book is all about arming you with the knowledge to make thoughtful and considered decisions and to be able to change when you need to. To soulfully lead your life with heart and health firmly in your grasp.
When I began the journey back to working-mum land, I knew all the right things to do … or so I thought. I was busy, I was rushing, I was yelling … I was trying to do it all. In this part of the book I share a lot about my motherhood journey.
I'd like to start by planting some seeds of hope that you aren't alone and that you are in the right space to learn about motherhood.
In part I we'll be looking into the knowledge and backstory of motherhood. In each chapter, I'll give you some gentle run-throughs of important stuff that will help you rediscover your awesome self and your health, and to find a bit more joy. I'll share some knowledge and research, and paint a picture of how it might show up for you. Or, at least, how I've seen it in some other mums' worlds.
I definitely had to turn on and off my researcher brain for this part of the book. My hope is that I've injected enough real life into it that you get to the end and can see the parallels in your own world. Doing the work now on the you part of motherhood will make understanding the how a lot easier.
The body is a wondrous thing. It is able to adapt and change and mould, and it responds perfectly to its environment all the time thanks to our brain and nervous system. But stress can lead us to being switched ‘on’ all the time, which isn't healthy. And stress is something we all had our fair share of during COVID, particularly during lockdowns. For mothers, this has had a particularly significant impact.
In this part of the book, I'll be bringing to light how your body is magical. How it's wonderful. How it's able to allow you your human existence and keep being resilient through the motherhood gig.
Enjoy learning about your awesome self because that's exactly what you are. My hope is that by the end of part I you will be able to recognise just how amazing you are and that if you're struggling a bit to balance motherhood and life (including work), you'll learn how to reclaim your ‘self’ again!
(1) INTRODUCING MOTHERHOOD AND JOURNEYS
My motherhood and journeys into the great awesome unknown!
I thought I would start out on our journey of discovering burnout, mum-life, working-mum life and all the glorious in between with a bit of a discussion about my motherhood. Because sure, I can qualify myself with skills learned at uni, but there's nothing like the trenches and supporting thousands of mums along the way!
In this opening chapter you'll read a bit about:
my motherhood journey
burnout — how it can show up and surprise us
support systems and stress
patriarchy in motherhood (a quick little chat and eye opener)
insights into healing yourself and vitality.
Observations from before I took the leap into motherhood
When I graduated from RMIT University way back in 2002, I thought motherhood was just another linear element in our life, a trajectory that a lot of women traverse along because it is the ‘done’ thing. As a country kid growing up in regional Victoria, I was encouraged to study one of three professions: doctor, lawyer or stockbroker. These were perceived as my way out of the country life and into a ‘safe job’.
My mum worked at the hospital in town as a sonographer and I would often go there after school to wait for a lift home (town was some 45 kilometres away from our home). Interestingly, I began to observe the difficulties professional women experienced in that environment, and how they were always juggling and figuring out how to ‘manage it all’.
When I was 15, I went to a chiropractor for the first time and, as well as getting rid of the pain I'd been experiencing in my feet for a long time, I learned that they could choose their own working hours. Subconsciously, choosing chiropractic — a career that is supportive of working mums — was a no-brainer. Not only had it been modelled to me as an easy working-mum choice but having been around inter-generational models of working mothers, I guess I felt well placed to ‘have it all’.
As a 23-year-old chiropractor, I gave it little regard, however, and began on my lightning-fast career trajectory. This took me to the other side of Australia, all the way to Perth, where I met some amazing women who have influenced my motherhood. Love stories abound about how we all met … but I'll save that for another time!
At university, when I was studying chiropractic, there was zero focus on matrescence (the beautiful shift and change from woman to mother, something I'll be discussing in depth in chapter 3) and the stages of motherhood. We were taught about the pregnant mother, but not how to care for the post-partum one. We were taught about newborn babies, infants and toddlers. We were taught about the hormonal flux of adolescence. There was no highlight reel of the elements of motherhood we needed to be supportive of. It was pretty much glossed over. This really needs to change if we are going to support mothers in the way they need us to.
When I began practising, I was blessed to take over a private family practice and I began working closely with mums, both for themselves and as parents of the children under my care. It was here that I witnessed, firsthand, the desire of mothers to have all of the best things for their children, including health.