realized that his inner speech was highly destructive because of the intensity and force of his silent thoughts and emotions and personally conducted mental condemnation and vilification of the sales manager entered into his own subconscious mind. This brought about the negative response from his boss as well as creating many other personal, physical and emotional disorders.
He began to pray frequently as follows: “I am the only thinker in my universe. I am responsible for what I think about my boss. My sales manager is not responsible for the way I think about him. I refuse to give power to any person, place or thing to annoy me or disturb me. I wish health, success, peace of mind and happiness for my boss. I sincerely wish him well, and I know he is divinely guided in all his ways.”
He repeated this prayer out loud slowly, quietly and feelingly, knowing that his mind is like a garden, and that whatever he plants in the garden will come forth like seeds after their kind.
I also taught him to practice mental imagery prior to sleep in this way: He imagined that his sales manager was congratulating him on his fine work, on his zeal and enthusiasm, and on his wonderful response from customers. He felt the reality of all this, felt his handshake, heard the tone of his voice and saw him smile. He made a real mental movie, dramatizing it to the best of his ability. Night after night he conducted this mental move, knowing that his subconscious mind was the receptive plate on which his conscious imagery would be impressed.
Gradually by a process of what may be termed mental and spiritual osmosis, the impression was made on his subconscious mind, and the expression automatically came forth. The sales manager subsequently called him up to San Francisco, congratulated him, and gave him a new assignment as Division Sales Manager over one hundred men with a big increase in salary. He changed his concept and estimate of his boss, and the latter responded accordingly.
Becoming Emotionally Mature
What the other person says or does cannot really annoy or irritate you except you permit him to disturb you. The only way he can annoy you is through your own thought. For example, if you get angry, you have to go through four stages in your mind. You begin to think about what he said. You decide to get angry and generate an emotion of rage. Then, you decide to act. Perhaps, you talk back and react in kind. You see that the thought, emotion, reaction and action all take place in your mind.
When you become emotionally mature, you do not respond negatively to the criticism and resentment of others. To do so would mean that you had descended to that state of low mental vibration and become one with the negative atmosphere of the other. Identify yourself with your aim in life, and do not permit any person, place, or thing to deflect you from your inner sense of peace, tranquility and radiant health.
The Meaning Of Love In Harmonious Human Relations
Sigmund Freud, the Austrian founder of psychoanalysis, said that unless the personality has love, it sickens and dies. Love includes understanding, good will and respect for the divinity in the other person. The more love and good will you emanate and exude, the more comes back to you.
If you puncture the other fellow's ego and would his estimate of himself, you cannot gain his good will. Recognize that every man wants to be loved and appreciated, and made to feel important in the world. Realize that the other man is conscious of his true worth, and that, like yourself, he feels the dignity of being an expression of the One Life-Principle animating all men. As you do this consciously and knowingly, you build the other person up, and he returns your love and good will.
He Hated Audiences
An actor told me that the audience booed and hissed him on his first appearance on the stage. He added that the play was badly written and that undoubtedly he did not play a good role. He admitted openly to me that for months afterward he hated audiences. He called them dopes, dummies, stupid, ignorant, gullible, etc. He quit the stage in disgust and went to work in a drugstore for a year.
One day a friend invited him to hear a lecture in Town Hall, New York City, on “How to Get Along With Ourselves.” This lecture changed his life. He went back to the stage and began to pray sincerely for the audience and himself. He poured out love and good will every night before appearing on the stage. He made it a habit to claim that the peace of God filled the hearts of all present, and that all present were lifted up and inspired. During each performance he sent out love vibrations to the audience. Today, he is a great actor, and he loves and respects people. His good will and esteem are transmitted to others and are felt by them.
Handling Difficult People
There are difficult people in the world who are twisted and distorted mentally. They are malconditioned. Many are mental delinquents, argumentative, uncooperative, cantankerous, cynical and sour on life. They are sick psychologically. Many people have deformed and distorted minds, probably warped during childhood. Many have congenital deformities. You would not condemn a person who had tuberculosis, nor should you condemn a person who is mentally ill. No one, for example, hates or resents a hunchback; there are many mental hunchbacks. You should have compassion and understanding. To understand all is to forgive all.
Misery Loves Company
The hateful, frustrated, distorted and twisted personality is out of tune with the infinite. He resents those who are peaceful, happy and joyous. Usually he criticizes, condemns and vilifies those who have been very good and kind to him. His attitude is this: Why should they be so happy when he is so miserable? He wants to drag them down to his own level. Misery loves company. When you understand this you remain unmoved, calm and dispassionate.
The Practice Of Empathy In Human Relations
A girl visited me recently stating that she hated another girl in her office. She gave her reason that the other girl was prettier, happier and wealthier than she, and, in addition, was engaged to the boss of the company where they worked. One day after the marriage had taken place, the crippled daughter (by a former marriage) of the woman whom she hated came into the office. The child put her arms around her mother and said, “Mommy, mommy, I love my new daddy! Look what he gave me!” She showed her mother a wonderful new toy.
She said to me, “My heart went out to that little girl, and I knew how happy she must feel. I got a vision of how happy this woman was. All of a sudden I felt love for her, and I went into the office wished her all the happiness in the world, and I meant it.”
In psychological circles today, this is called empathy which simply means the imaginative projection of your mental attitude into that of another. She projected her mental mood or the feeling of her heart into that of the other woman, and began to think and look out through the other woman's brain. She was actually thinking and feeling as the other woman, and also as the child, because she likewise had projected herself into the mind of the child. She was looking out from that vantage point on the child's mother.
If tempted to injure of think ill of another, project yourself mentally into the mind of Moses and think from the standpoint of the Ten Commandments. If you are prone to be envious, jealous or angry, project yourself into the mind of Jesus and think from that standpoint, and you will feel the truth of the words Love ye one another.
Appeasement Never Wins
Do not permit people to take advantage of you and gain the point by temper tantrums, crying jags or so-called heart attacks. These people are dictators who try to enslave you and make you do their bidding. Be firm but kind, and refuse to yield. Appeasement never wins. Refuse to contribute to their delinquency, selfishness and
