He Who Returned. Martin Fieber
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During the last couple of weeks Jesus had spent a lot of time in the workshop while the men were in Sepphoris. He had carved himself his flute and other small objects. He loved wood, especially the olive wood with its interesting grain. He had secretly tried out some of the smaller tools and had already gained some abilities. Joseph however knew nothing about all this. Although he was young compared to his nearly grown-up half brothers, he knew that he would be deliver quality craftsmanship and that he would be a good craftsman if God asked this of him. He would like to build new houses.
God, I thank you for being here in Nazareth. Today for the first time I had the feeling that I was in exactly the right place here. I did not know this up until now, but now I am certain of it. Even though I often feel weak and drained, even if I am sickly, as people in the village apparently say about me, even though I still hear voice calling ‚you false Messiah!’ behind my back, from today on I know that I am in exactly the right place. Why since today you might ask father, but I do not know the answer.
Joshua was very sad today. I have rarely seen a boy who already has such an aura of sadness at his age. Please help him and his family. May you bless all beings and fill them with your love. May it always be thus.
∞
Joshua and the other children were sitting in school listening to the words of the torah. Samuel was reading them a few passages from the records which described the life of Moses. But Joshua was not listening because his thoughts were with his mother, who had recovered physically some in the last couple of days, yet who had remained a different person nonetheless since the horrible event. She was closed-off and kept her speech to a bare minimum in daily life. Suddenly Jacob the potter entered the room and told Samuel that a man who urgently wished to speak with him was waiting outside in the courtyard.
“Children, wait here. I will be right back.” He had hardly stepped outside when he returned with hasty steps.
“Let us quickly pray, for we have to cancel class for today. I will have to speak with the visitor for a while. May God, our Lord, bless our life, give us enough food and a loving heart.”
Then Samuel hurried off, after he had stored the torah scroll in the shrine.
“Your father has pretty words on his lips, scar-face.” Simeon stopped briefly in front of Joshua. “A loving heart. Pah, what a joke, I heard he hit your mother black and blue.” He made a strange grimace and hurried out of the synagogue with his pals. They would probably use the next hours for their weapon games. They didn’t think of anything else anymore. But Joshua for once had to agree with Simeon. His father should not have said that bit about a ‚loving heart’. Joshua felt as if he had turned to stone.
“You are not feeling well today, or?” Jesus had sat down next to Joshua.
“I hate my father. I hate him and I am afraid of him. You know what he did to my mother. I will never forgive him that.”
“Yes, it is horrible. But try to give these bad feeling sup to God, our loving father. Then he can carry the burden which would otherwise crush you at some point, and then you will feel lighter around your loving heart.”
“That is easy for you to say, Jesus. But I can not do that.”
“The main thing is that you remember my words for the future. If my father had done that to my mother, I would feel just the same.” Jesus put his hand on Joshua’s shoulder. Joshua could tell that Jesus wanted to distract him and get him to think of something happier.
“Joshua, in a few days I might be allowed to accompany my half-brothers and Joseph to Sepphoris. Would you like to join us?”
Joshua’s eyes beamed with joy before they were filled with sadness again abruptly.
“I think my father would not allow it.”
“But I am sure that you would enjoy it.”
“Yes, I love stories. It sure would be nice.”
“Joshua, trust me.” Suddenly the face of Jesus took on an otherworldly quality and his eyes shone even brighter than usual. “Our father in heaven is all-powerful. He makes it possible. There will be a way, even if you can not see it now.”
The blue eyes which gazed deep into him peered down into the depths of his soul. He felt recognized. He felt loved. He felt at peace. Everything else around him disappeared into a mist and all he saw were these smiling blue eyes which he never ever wanted to forget again.
“Joshua, my son“, he heard a voice say, “brighten your heart. Forgive Samuel, for he does not know what it is that he does.”
In these moments Joshua felt happier than ever before. He felt Jesus gently brush his arm as he stood up and left the synagogue. A few teardrops ran down his cheeks. He felt so sheltered, and it was completely normal for him in this instant that Jesus addressed him as a son. It fit into the holiness of the moment.
Joshua made his way back to his mother. On his way across the courtyard he briefly watched his sisters who were baking some bread. Before he reached the doorway of the entrance he heard an unknown voice that was speaking with his father. Both of the men were seated at a table and speaking excitedly when Joshua entered.
“Joshua, come over here. I want to introduce you to an important man from Jerusalem.” Samuel smiled proudly. “Bealja, this is my son. He will enter upon the same path later on. He is very talented and can already read at his young age.”
“Joshua, I am pleased to meet you.”
“My pleasure as well, sir.”
Joshua went over to his mother who was cutting bread in the room next door and preparing a salad with herbs for the guest.
“Mother, how are you?”
“Don’t worry, Joshua. I will always be there for you. I will protect you and your sisters, even if we have go to another country.”
“Is it really true that we have to go away?”
“Yes, my son, it is. We will journey to a Greek city, to Ephesus. It is supposed to be a large city in which many people live.”
“Mother, I do not want to go away from here.”
“I know, but there is no alternative to it. We are bound by a duty of loyalty to your father and he has to take on an important task there. In a couple of weeks the time will come for the move. This man said earlier that we will hear about it early on.” His mother gently stroked his hair. “Joshua, Ephesus is supposed to be a town of the arts. There is supposedly a theater there and also private libraries. And I know how much you like old writings.”
Though that was a glimmer of light on the horizon, Joshua still did not want to leave. He wanted to remain with his friend Rachel. And he especially did not want to leave Jesus, for he loved his beautiful blue eyes.
Sarah brought both the men the salad and the bread and then