A Cure for All Diseases. Reginald Hill

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really my interest is purely professional – Ive given men up – remember!

      Finally I got him talking about himself – fascinating – though as far as my research is concerned I soon realized Franny doesnt fit in at all. His thing is 3rd Thought – have you heard of it? I recall in my 1st year at uni going to a talk given by a guy called Frere Jacques – in dads terms very much a daft bugger! – who founded the movement. Lots in it about modern living making us lose touch with death – the need to establish a hospice of the mind – & a lot of similar gobbledygook which us smart 1st year psych students all rubbished like mad – but the guy himself was gorgeous – had an aura – & a lovely ass. Frannys the same – except his aura aint pure white like Frere Js – more shot silk – changing & mysterious – & I didnt get the chance to check out his ass! Anyway – thing is – with 3rd Thought theres no physical therapy involved – no taking up your bed & walking – not surprising really – guy in a wheelchair isnt likely to get far promising miracle cures. So – nothing here for me – except – I really enjoyed talking to him – & including him in my research gives me a good excuse for doing it again! So we ended by exchanging mobile nos & email addresses before he went off to Big Bums.

      Anyway thats it for now. Spent the afternoon – after a sandwich in the pub – meeting the rest of the inhabitants of Sandytown – every single one of them it felt like! – then back here to Kyoto. Quiet night in – reading – & hammering the kids at snap! Make sure you answer this one sis. Dont see why you should get the details of my wild life in Sandytown while all I get from you is a pregnant (?) silence. So – no prevarications – I want dirt – I want dimensions!

      Love

      Charley xxx

FROM: [email protected]
TO: [email protected]
SUBJECT: camomile tea!

      Hi! Still no word. Working on the Headbanger principle that the only thing that travels faster than bad news is crap through a goose – Ive not started worrying – yet!

      Here excitement piles on excitement – not sure if Ill be able to bear much more!

      Thats called irony by the way – just in case youve completely forgotten everything Mr big-Dickenson at the comp taught you in English – though I dont suppose you heard much of what he said – above the roar of your randy hormones!

      First – Toms sister Diana turned up! None of the strong hints Id had about her oddness prepared me for the reality. Not bad looking – small & trim – full of words & fuller of energy – or so it seemed to me – though by her own – & Toms – account – she spends so much time lying at deaths door – she must be a real hindrance to his milkman!

      Death must be on hold today – way she came bursting in at Kyoto like a small tornado.

      – I am just arrived – she proclaimed – let me sit down – (which she did) – your raw sea air – a tonic I know for some – is too savage for my weak constitution. Where are the dear children – (jumping out of her chair) – I must see them at once – & this is Miss Heywood – I know you from Toms letters – my dear – its true Tom – a fine complexion – no trouble with your circulation – Tom – how is your ankle? – let me see – (here she knelt & pulled up her brothers trouser leg & folded down his sock) – looks fine to me – very little swelling – (not surprising as she was looking at the wrong ankle) – you say the Willingdene healer played a part? – an interesting acquisition – too late for me of course – years of misdiagnosis by incompetent MDs have put me beyond hope of healing – but I work tirelessly for others –

      As I listened to Diana rattling on – I began to understand Toms preoccupation with alternative medicine. In his beloved sisters eyes – alternative was mainstream – she was into alternatives to the alternatives!

      Finally Tom got a word in – asking where her luggage was – assuming she would be staying at Kyoto – causing Mary to wince before the polite smile formed – but relief was on its way.

      – such was of course my intention – said Di – but as you know I have been ever industrious in singing the praises of Sandytown – Tom – & as you may have noticed – I have been instrumental in persuading a friend of mine – seeking a holiday destination for herself & her teenage neices – to choose Sandytown rather than one of the less salubrious resorts – so I thought I would drop in on her at Seaview Terrace to check that all was as perfect as I had promised –

      – & was it? – asked Tom.

      – alas no – she said – Unfortunately one of her neices had slipped while scrambling over some rocks on the shore – damaging her leg – not too seriously – but sufficient for her to wish to recuperate at home – & naturally her sibling went with her. I found Sandy – that is my freind – Mrs Griffiths – undecided whether to follow their example – or stay on by herself. Seeing the danger that her early return might start a rumour that Sandytown beach was unsafe – whereas the truth is – as you know Tom – we have some of the least slippery rocks on the east coast – I immediately offered my services – both as co-tenant – & as a conduit into the best circles of the district – both of which offers Mrs Griffiths – that is – Sandy – was delighted to accept. Beleive me – only my sense of responsibility for the good name of Sandytown – & by implication of yourself – Tom – would make me inflict this disappointment on you & Mary –

      She looked for applause – which Tom gave her – while Mary managed to murmur something about typical kindness – & all I could think was – unaccountable officiousness!

      Tom – full of brotherly concern for her frail constitution – insisted on driving her back down to the Terrace – with me invited along too – I suspect in my capacity of St J Ambulance trained physician – in case the shock of the sea air brought on a seizure!

      Sandy Griffiths – even though introduced as a ‘vegan warrior’! – had no outward signs of the kind of dottiness I suspect must be a precondition of chumming up with Deaths Door Di. 40 something – strong handsome face – with a peculiarly disturbing stare – I thought she looked pretty good for someone who presumably existed on sprout fricassees & nut cutlets. She made us v welcome. Tea was produced – camomile for Diana – of course! – Typhoo for the rest of us – plus some v nice cream cakes – which Di thrust aside with shudder – declaring that one bite would be the death of her. All the more for me! I noticed that Sandy G had a nibble too – so not a total vegan! Nor – it seemed to me – a particularly close buddy of Dianas – which made me wonder how shed let herself be manoeuvred into having Di as her live-in guide. Tried some subtle probing – but Sandy G fixed me with her stare – so I backed off. Maybe being called Sandy makes her feel as proprietorial about Sandytown as Diana clearly does!

      Tom clearly sees nothing but his sisters good points. He really is a sweetie. I find Im becoming as anxious as Mary that some people might be tempted to take advantage of his good-nature.

      2 more excitements – then Im done. I dont want to risk over-stimulating you!

      After we left the Terrace – driving back through the town – we saw Franny Roote hauling himself into his car. The ease with which he did it – reaching out to fold up his wheelchair & swing it

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