Escape to Willow Cottage: The brilliant, laugh-out-loud romcom you need to read in autumn 2018. Bella Osborne
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Jack was eyeing her as if awaiting an explanation for her actions.
‘It’s a very big dog, and dogs …’ she knew they were all waiting for her to say the word ‘bite’. ‘… dogs can be unpredictable. So, no, I’m sorry but I don’t think so.’
‘Shame. That means she’ll have to spend the day in her cage,’ said Jack, looking forlornly at Doris who was happily bashing her tail against his leg.
‘A cage?’ Leo looked outraged. Beth looked a little shocked too.
‘It’s okay, it’s to stop her wrecking the house.’ The expressions of alarm didn’t change. ‘Seriously, she’s an English mastiff, she’ll eat her way through a wall if I leave her on her own!’
‘But still. Putting her in a cage?’ said Beth, eyeing the behemoth of a dog.
‘It’s a proper extra-large dog cage but she’d rather be with me, obviously.’ Jack pulled a sad clown face.
‘Fine, bring her along,’ relented Beth, and Leo whooped his delight.
‘You’ll grow to love her,’ said Jack, as he patted Doris’s flank and the dog promptly wiped her slobbery jowl down the side of Beth’s jeans as she passed. Beth recoiled in disgust.
‘I doubt it,’ she muttered.
A large estate car was parked outside with a ladder strapped to the roof bars. Doris leaped into the boot and Jack jumped in the driver’s seat.
‘See you there,’ he shouted as he pulled away.
‘Fine,’ said Beth. She didn’t need a lift – she could almost see the willow tree from the B&B, but it would have been nice to be offered one. She put on her sunglasses and took Leo’s reluctant hand.
When they got to the cottage, Leo checked to see if Ernie was under the willow tree but he wasn’t. Jack already had his toolbox out and was studying the boards that covered the windows and the door.
‘Galvanized bolts,’ he said, nodding. ‘That’s good. It means they won’t have rusted. I’ve got just the thing for those.’ He pulled a large spanner from the toolbox and set to work.
‘Let’s get these off and see what we’re dealing with,’ said Jack. Beth wasn’t comfortable with Jack dishing out the instructions but she agreed as she didn’t have a better idea.
As he undid the last bolt Beth stood and took the weight of the large sheet of ply board. At the last second the board slipped in her grasp but Jack stopped it from falling.
‘Ow,’ complained Beth, checking her hands – splinters and a broken nail. She breathed out hard; this was starting to look less and less like her kind of thing. Lifting down the board revealed the window. There had once been white paint on the wooden frame but now most of it had peeled off. However, the sight of the series of perfect little square panes in the windows brought a smile to both their faces.
‘Georgian windows,’ said Jack, helping Beth to put down the board and lean it against the wall.
‘They’re lovely,’ said Beth leaning closer, ‘but not exactly good for keeping the cold out. I expect they’ll need swapping for double-glazed ones.’
‘No!’ said Jack crossly. ‘These are a thing of beauty. I’ll put some linseed oil on to protect them until you can get around to painting them but trust me they’ll keep the cold out. It’s the gaps round the edges that you’ll need to sort.’ He indicated where someone’s attempt at filling the gaps was already crumbling away.
‘Right,’ said Beth, feeling further out of her depth.
‘Flemish bond,’ he said, nodding at the brickwork.
‘Is he? I’m not really into films,’ said Beth, distractedly.
Leo and Doris played fetch with the ball until Doris put a large hole in it. Beth and Jack removed the other three boards and thankfully all but two of the small panes of glass were intact. Jack expertly taped some plastic over the broken ones so that they didn’t let in any rain. They both stared at the largest piece of board covering the front door, which itself was also covered by the sprawling ivy and white flowering plant.
Jack disappeared to the car boot. ‘Shall we?’ he said as he produced two large pairs of loppers.
‘Can I help?’ asked Leo.
‘Sorry, mate, these are a bit deadly but you can pull down as much of that traveller’s joy as you can.’ He pointed at the greenery covered in pretty white flowers and threw him some gloves.
Leo shoved his hands into the gloves. ‘They fit!’
Beth looked surprised. ‘They’re only those very stretchy ones; I thought they might come in handy,’ Jack said, setting to work with the loppers. Beth stood and watched. She wondered what she was doing. She couldn’t help – she’d never used loppers before and had no idea where to start, they were quite heavy and unwieldy. Every time she lifted them up they seemed to sway off to the right like some kind of giant magnet was pulling them. She put them down. The whole project was looking more and more ridiculous. Doris came up behind her and rested her heavy head against Beth’s hand, her droopy eyes making her look as forlorn as Beth felt. Beth sidestepped away from the drooling creature hoping Jack hadn’t noticed. She picked up the loppers again and tried in vain to control them as she snipped wildly at the air around the plants.
Thanks to Jack and Leo’s concerted efforts a little while later they were ready for the big front door reveal. The first thing Beth saw was more peeling paint but this time in a shade of bright pink.
‘Wow!’ exclaimed Leo.
‘I’m glad I’m wearing my sunglasses,’ said Beth.
‘It’s not all bad. It’s a pleasant style and the glass is a nice touch.’ Jack pointed to the four small panes that made a bigger square at head height. It was going to take a bit more to convince Beth.
Jack soon had the boards off the windows at the back of the house and loaded them into the boot of his car.
They grabbed two takeaway coffees and a squash from Rhonda and then set about the inside. Beth wasn’t sure if it looked better or worse now that the windows were letting in light. They both stood sipping their coffees while Leo sat on the bottom step of the stairs playing games on Beth’s iPhone.
‘Okay, boss. What are you thinking?’ asked Jack. Beth was sure she could sense derision in his voice. She was actually thinking ‘Oh shit, I’ve well and truly cocked up here’ but instead she said,
‘Number one priority is to make sure it’s watertight.’ She was pleased with the conviction in her words, she almost sounded like she knew what she was doing.
‘Lovely summer we’re having, hasn’t been any rain for weeks. How about you check upstairs for any obvious signs of leaks and damp patches and I’ll be back shortly.’
Beth didn’t have time to query what he was planning to do as he had already left, so she carefully went upstairs and started looking around. It was very difficult to identify damp patches under