murmured.
He frowned, realizing he’d heard her say that a long time ago. It had been six years since they’d broken up, yet there was so much he could still remember about Carolyn. She’d been important to him in a way no one else had ever been. Maybe the innocence of youth had deepened the level of understanding between them. Tightened their connection.
It had been difficult to come here today, to face the woman he’d loved so deeply. No man willingly sought out a woman who’d rejected him. Avoiding pain was what a man did best. He would never have married Marissa if he hadn’t been running from his shattered emotions. But his mother seemed to think Carolyn could help Lucy. Heaven only knew, what he was going to ask of her was impossible. Unthinkable.
Carolyn was a woman, not a savior.
“In the hospital, Mom revealed to me that I’d had a twin. She gave birth to two children, both boys.” He swallowed. It still felt strange to repeat his mother’s incredible words. “The other child—“ he couldn’t say my brother “-was stillborn, according to the nurse who attended her.”
Carolyn’s hand flew to make a notation, then her gaze met his again. He saw calm in her eyes, none of the raging fear and panic he felt. Her acceptance of his pronouncement allowed him to continue.
“At the time Mom delivered, apparently a black market baby ring was in operation in Texas, ghastly as that sounds. Newborns have always fetched top dollar. Mom had two, and she believes that one of them may have been…stolen.”
“But if one was stillborn, then why would the baby have been stolen?”
“Mom believes she heard the cry of another infant in the room. Two babies crying, but only for a few seconds. She was groggy from medication—even then women were often put to sleep to have children.”
“I know. My mother said it was wonderful to wake up and be handed a baby.”
He nodded. “Mom says she was already coming out of the anaesthesia when she heard the crying. But when she was told that one of her children had been stillborn, she didn’t suspect that anyone would lie to her about it. She was young, seventeen, and my father was away at a farmer’s market in Fort Worth, and…”
“She was overwhelmed and frightened. And too young to question what she’d heard.”
“Right.” A sigh escaped him. “I won’t tell you that I embraced this story of hers when she told me. I know Mom was desperate to find a bone marrow match for Lucy, and at a success rate of one in three million, we’d need an angel to guide us in finding one.”
Carolyn made no comment, didn’t raise an eyebrow in disbelief. He’d gotten past the hard parts without rejection. She seemed to take in every word he said with complete empathy.
“Mom was rambling at the end somewhat, and this could easily be the wishful thinking of a dying woman. I know wishful thinking is more my companion every day, but even I know how implausible this sounds.”
“I’m sure you and Marissa have run through both sides of your family tree for possibilities?”
“Of course.”
Carolyn held his gaze for a second before looking at her notes. He had the feeling she was deep in thought. Her green eyes were alert, her posture erect. She’d always had a curvaceous, knock-out body, but the coral suit she wore gave her a professional demeanor. He liked the fact that the body he remembered so well was hidden beneath a jacket, knee-length skirt and gauzy blouse—a secret he would have preferred to keep his alone.
Pushing back auburn-tinted, rich brown hair, Carolyn met his gaze again. His heart stilled as he realized she was about to pronounce the time, dollars and energy this search would require.
“Ben, there are records which can be searched easily enough to get us started. It is true that long-lost relatives have been found as a result of searches by loved ones who suspect exactly what your mother did. But the outcome is a long shot, and I’m sure you know that.”
He nodded.
“Still, it’s not unthinkable.”
“You’ll do it, then?” The relief that swept through him was a crashing ocean wave flinging him onto a beach of hope.
“I’ll present your case file to Lily and Dylan Garrett. They’re better equipped to assist you. Lily has experience as a forensics expert for the FBI, and Dylan worked as an undercover detective. Actually, he was instrumental in breaking that baby-selling ring last spring. We’ve also started to refer cases to Budnicki-Morales Private Investigations in Midland-Odessa. Jennifer Rodriguez works there, and she is top-notch at locating missing persons.”
“While I appreciate your advice to put my case in experienced hands, you said yourself that records could be easily searched to start the ball rolling. That’s something you can do yourself, isn’t it?”
She nodded. “Yes, but—”
“Where are the Garretts right now?”
Her expressive emerald eyes widened. “Lily is getting married, so she’s tied up with wedding details, and Dylan is out of town handling some of her caseload.”
“So, they’re otherwise occupied and not likely to give top priority to this case.”
“The Garretts are thorough in their attention—”
“I know. My point is that my daughter is very ill with acute lymphocytic leukemia. I don’t have the luxury of time. You said yourself the research process could easily be started. In fact, I’m here because of Carolyn St. Clair, not the Garretts. I trust you, and I know you well enough to know that you’ll use all your energy to tear into the facts like a tenacious bull, Carolyn.”
“Thanks, I think,” she murmured.
He reached to touch her chin with his finger, so that she’d meet his eyes. “I need you for this, Carolyn. Mom sent me here with her last breath, to find you and ask you for your help. She knew you loved her…knew you’d fall in love with Lucy.”
Knew you’d loved me. He didn’t say it, but the words hung between them, implied and poignant. For whatever reason she’d left him—and that was a mystery he’d never unlock now—he knew in his heart that when Carolyn St. Clair loved someone, she loved with all her soul.
He was counting on that for Lucy.
CHAPTER TWO
WHEN BEN LOOKED at her like that, with his eyes full of hope that she’d say yes, Carolyn put her personal reservations aside for the moment. “Tell me everything your mother told you. Anything you can remember she said before she died.”
“The doctor who delivered me was Douglas Benton. He worked with his wife, Vivian—she assisted him in a midwife capacity.”
“Your mother didn’t go to a hospital?”
“No. For one thing, she was from tough country stock. Her mother’s children were born at home, and Mom didn’t know there was another way to do it. Also, she and Dad simply didn’t have the cash to go to a hospital. Remember, back then a person paid medical
