was anxious to hear what his doctor had told him about the fatigue he couldn’t shake.
Her father, Zachariah Swartzentruber, had always been a big man. He stood six feet tall, but she hadn’t noticed until this moment how his clothes seemed to hang on his frame now or how bent he was becoming. He moved slowly, as if his actions were painful or difficult as he got out of the buggy. She hoped the English doctor had discovered what was wrong and prescribed some medicine to make her father better.
She held open the door as he came up the walk. “How was your trip, Daed?”
“It was a long way. The traffic gets worse every time I must go into town. The foolish Englisch rush past without a care in their big cars.”
Their little Amish community of Bowmans Crossing was more than five miles off the state highway. Even so, the traffic in the area was increasing, as were the accidents involving buggies and cars.
She waited until her father took a seat at the kitchen table. “What did the doctor have to say?”
“Is there any kaffi?”
“Ja, I made a pot about an hour ago.” Going to the stove, she pulled a brown mug from the shelf overhead and filled it to the brim with the strong brew from her coffeepot.
“Danki.” He accepted the cup from her hand and stirred in a heaping spoonful of sugar. He sat staring into the liquid, stirring slowly.
Fear crept into Emma’s heart. It wasn’t like her father to be so quiet. Something was wrong. “What did the doctor have to say, Daed?”
Her father took a sip of coffee. “This is goot. You always could make good kaffi. Not like your mother. Her kaffi was always weak as dishwater.”
Emma swallowed hard. It was unusual for her father to speak about his deceased wife. The Amish rarely talked about loved ones who had passed on. Her worry spiked, but she knew better than to keep pressing him. When he was ready, he would tell her what the doctor had discovered.
She poured herself a cup and carried it to the table. “Mamm was a frugal woman. She could stretch a nickel into a dime and give you two cents change.”
A tiny smiled lifted the corner of his lip. “That she could. I think sometimes she used the same grounds for three days in a row.”
“I like my coffee stout. I would rather save on other things.”
He looked at her then. “You need a new dress. I would not have you looking so shabby.”
The front of her everyday dress was stained and the cuffs were getting thin, but it had at least another year of use before it went into the rag bag. “I can’t wear a good dress to do laundry and scrub floors. This one will do for a little longer. My other workday dress is not so worn, and I have a nice Sunday dress. I don’t need anything else.”
“If a fella was to come courting, you’d want to look nice. We can afford the material.”
They couldn’t, but that wasn’t the point. She saw her father had something serious on his mind. “No one is coming to court me. What’s wrong, Daed?”
“Wayne Hochstetler intends to ask you out.”
She sat back in surprise. “Wayne? How do you know this?”
Wayne was a widower and the eldest son of their neighbor to the west. He and his family belonged to a different church group, one that was more conservative, but Wayne was known as a stalwart member of the Amish faith and a good farmer. His father was the bishop of their church district.
“I spoke with his father. Wayne is looking for a wife. He has a young daughter who needs a mother.”
“I hope he finds one, but what makes you think I would be interested in going out with him?”
“Because it’s time you married. It’s past time. You will be thirty soon. That is old enough to be settled.”
“I’m barely twenty-five, Daed.”
“That is still plenty old enough. I want you to seriously consider Wayne as a husband. His father and I are good friends. This would make us happy.”
“I thought marriage was a question of who would make me happy.” She once believed Luke Bowman was that man, but she had been mistaken. Sadly mistaken.
“Love can grow from friendship and mutual respect. If there is someone else, dochder, please tell me now.”
“I have enough to do taking care of you and the boys. There isn’t anyone I’m interested in.”
“Goot, then you will consider Wayne?”
“Not until you give me a better reason than my age and your friendship with his father. What’s this about? Why this sudden interest in seeing me married off? I have plenty of time to meet the right man and fall in love.”
He sighed heavily. “You may have the time, but I do not. The news from the doctor was not goot, but it was what I have been expecting.”
Her heart pounded painfully, stealing her breath. “You are frightening me. What did he say?”
“I have inherited the same disease that took my father when you were but a small child. My kidneys are failing. The doctor thinks I have a year, maybe two, before it is my time to stand before God and be judged.”
She stared at him in disbelief. “Is the doctor sure? Can’t there be some mistake? I know you’ve been ill, but you’ll get better. You can see another doctor.”
He reached across the table and took her hand in his. “I knew this was coming when I started having the same type of pain that wore down my father. I can only pray that God has chosen to spare my sons.”
“And me? Can this disease come to me and my children?”
“You forget. You are my stepdaughter. I married your mother when you were only a babe. Your father died in a farming accident. This disease I inherited cannot come to you.”
It was true. She always forgot that Zachariah wasn’t her real father. “You have been a father to me in every sense of the word save that one small thing. I could not love you more if we were bound by blood.”
“You are a true child of my heart, Emma, but I won’t be able to care for you and the boys for much longer. I need to know someone will look after the lot of you when I’m gone. It falls to you now. The boys are too young.”
“I don’t have to be married to take care of my brothers. You know I will always do that. The church will help us.”
“Wayne has a prosperous farm. Combined with my land, it will be more than enough. You will not be dependent on the charity of others. Do not mistake me—there’s nothing wrong with accepting charity when you need it, but it is much better not to need it. I’m not afraid to face death but I am afraid of leaving you and your brothers without a secure future. Can you understand that?”
“Ja, I do. I can’t believe this is happening.” She didn’t
